Is there just so much you want to fix in your life you are not quite sure where to start? Does the idea of feeling good now, when there is so much you don’t like now, seem like a tall order?
Discovering how our reality really works, and who we really are, is literally life-changing. The idea we don’t have to put up with what we don’t want, and we can mold things just to our liking, can make us feel pretty great.
We feel a lightness and a sense of hope. It is exciting to think all the desires that have been relegated to nothing more than fantasy or ‘pie in the sky’ can actually come to fruition.
We can experience a huge sense of relief knowing we are not trapped.
But, as many of us come to know when we start consciously creating our reality, the theory of law of attraction and actually putting it into practice can be worlds apart.
Something that is supposed to be so simple feels incredibly difficult.
And, this becomes even more obvious if we are mired down in all forms of crap, and want to change a lot of things about our life.
We may start to feel anxious. We don’t know where to focus our energy. We may not even know what we want fully, we just know we don’t like what we have now.
Knowing what we know now about how reality is created, even if we don’t fully buy into it 1 million percent on a level of feeling, can quickly make us less tolerant of our current situation.
It is one thing to think you have to put up with a bunch of shit you don’t like, but really don’t think you can change, but discovering you don’t have to?
That can amplify the pain and unhappiness that was already there, but was being suppressed.
So, if you are one of those people who is just hating everything, and wants to give your life a complete overhaul by consciously applying the principles of attraction, here are some insights that should make the journey a whole lot easier.
Know Nothing Needs to Happen Right Now to Start Feeling Better
Since our outer experience is a mirror of our inner world, we have to start on the inside. Nothing needs to change on the outside first to start feeling better. You don’t have to worry about making any bold decisions, or taking any sort of action right now.
Because we are so conditioned to act to make things happen, that urge can feel strong. But since there may not be much you can think to do right now, it creates a huge source of frustration, especially if you are unhappy with various elements of your current experience .
You hate your job, you hate your spouse, you hate where you live, you hate not having enough money, you hate your body, you just hate everything.
That’s a sucky spot to be in, and since we are so used to living from the outside in, naturally we are going to look to how we can change the outside, hoping it will make us feel better inside.
But, as you become more familiar with how law of attraction works, you realize that isn’t the most effective strategy.
Sure, you may make certain changes that bring a temporary sense of relief, but it will be just that..temporary.
The energy that created such a clusterfuck is still there, and it will keep manifesting in some shape or form.
Now, this isn’t to say certain outside changes can’t help—eventually all sorts of changes will be made. But, you have to work on getting things right internally first, and then acting from that space.
That way is much easier and things will flow a lot more smoothly.
When you realize you can start feeling better now, without anything having to change to allow you to feel better, your life as it is now will seem much more manageable.
Sure, you still won’t like things, and want them to change, but it won’t seem as unbearable.
You have to start examining your feelings, thoughts and beliefs now to see what may have led things to manifest as they have.
Once you figure that out, you can work on shifting all of that. You don’t need to jump from despair to unbridled joy to start seeing changes, so don’t try to because you can’t anyway.
But if you take what I said to heart, you will start seeing all sorts of great manifestations that will help carve out the path. You will start realizing things don’t need to change all at once to start feeling better.
Focus on Just Feeling Better Overall
Again, since we are so oriented towards actions, we have a tendency to zero in on the problems and figure out how they can be solved. We have to dissect the issue and see what can be done.
Without doing that, things can’t possibly improve, right? And no matter how painful it is to think about, and how frustrating it is to not be able to see how things could be different, we insist on focusing on it, all the while feeling like crap.
This mode of operating is really sucky, and when you are doing this for multiple things that are really bothering you? Forget about it..it can feel like sheer torture.
But, this isn’t how it has to be. You don’t need to figure anything out right now. You don’t even really have to focus much on what is happening, though you probably won’t be able to do that consistently, and it’s fine.
Since our vibration is what creates our reality, raising that is the most effective way to start seeing improvements in our life.
You don’t need to get one million percent happy. You don’t have to go into denial and pretend to like things about your life you just don’t—you have preferences and that’s fine.
Though it is necessary to find a perspective that genuinely makes you feel better.
If you commit to finding ways to make yourself feel better overall, you will be amazed at what starts to happen. You will start getting all sorts of ideas and inspirations. You will attract solutions to problems.
You will be presented with opportunities. You will meet people who can help you in some way.
Seeing this ‘proof’ will lighten things up, and you won’t feel so terrible anymore, even if certain things haven’t changed significantly.
You will see manifestations that touch on all these areas you want to change, even if you haven’t put any focus on them specifically for any length of time,or even gave much thought to what you actually wanted.
So, what can you do now that will ease some of the stress or create some relief? Don’t discount even the smallest of changes because they add up, and can make a big difference.
Maybe it is making more time for a hobby, or dropping a commitment that is draining you.
Perhaps you just need some more alone time.
Do you have a pain in the ass client who takes up most of your time but makes up only a fraction of your income? Maybe you should think about ending that relationship.
Does the idea of taking a break from the job search or the endless meet ups from the dating website create a sense of relief? If so, do it.
I’m not gonna lie..your mind will fight you on this approach. It will constantly remind you how much you hate your life, and how many things are going wrong, and how you should be digging in and finding a way to make everything better.
There is just so much that needs to be tended to, and it is your job to fix all of it.
But, it really isn’t your job…the Universe can orchestrate things so much better than we can. We are no match for infinite possibilities and resources.
Sorry mind..you’re awesome and useful in so many ways, but this just isn’t your department.
Set Some General Intentions
If you have specific things you would like to manifest, that is great. Write them down, get some energy flowing towards them with some positive focus, and what have you.
But, when you are in a position where everything seems to be wrong, and you want a total life makeover, all this specific focus can sometimes work against you.
There is just so much you want to change, and so much that would need to be done. It feels overwhelming and discouraging.
You have probably read over and over again about the importance of getting super specific with what you want down to the last detail, and then constantly thinking about it.
And thinking you have to do that for 10 different things probably doesn’t feel that great, and all that visualizing, and focusing on such specific outcomes, won’t do much if there is no genuine good feeling behind it.
So, anyone in this position would probably really benefit from setting some more general intentions. You don’t need to worry about getting super-specific.
These more general intentions can help flesh out what you are really looking to accomplish, which is producing certain feelings.
Because as I have probably said a million times before on this good old blog—you are always after feelings. You just want to feel good.
So, think about the different areas of your life you want to improve. Write them all down, and then write out some intentions that illustrate what you are hoping to accomplish feeling-wise. Think of the bigger picture.
For example, if you are hoping to improve your money situation, don’t write intentions for creating a certain amount of money, getting a raise,etc… think about what you want to feel. Some intentions may be to feel like you have more than you need, secure, that you can do what you want without worrying whether you can pay for it, that you feel at ease meeting your financial obligations,etc…
If you want to change your job, think about what you would want to the work to make you feel like. Think about the type of environment you would enjoy working in.
These general intentions will help you get to the core of what you are really after, and will activate less resistance because you are not focusing on specific outcomes that you probably don’t feel are fully possible for you right now.
You are just focusing on the broader strokes, and in doing this, you open up the doors for these energies to start flowing to you. You open up the doors to specific manifestations that will produce these much desired feelings.
In Closing…
Like I have said many times before, law of attraction is an incredibly simple concept, but it can be a bit tricky at times to make things happen. Had we been raised to realize this is how reality works, and how powerful we are, manifesting would be easy peasy from the get-go
But, most of us aren’t raised like that. The ‘big’ us that is just that pure positive energy, and a manifesting machine, is so powerful, our higher selves thought it would be a fun challenge to come into this form and forget what we are capable of, and go about rediscovering it.
Those of you that are finally seeing what’s what are emerging from this fog, a fog that is thick with limiting beliefs, fears and all other sorts of yuck.
When we find ourselves in a position of a life overflowing with that which we don’t want, all of a sudden dropping all our shit is not likely to happen.
Deciding we want massive change in various respects is a great start, but as for getting from where you are now to where you want to be, that can seem daunting. It just seems like there is so much that needs to happen, so much to ‘figure out.’
I hope what I wrote here gave you something to chew on, and will help clear up some of the anxiety as to how to make such leaps, and how to focus your energy.
Follow your intuition. Follow your feelings and see where they lead you.
No matter what happens, remember every manifestation serves you. The obstacles show you are moving forward.
Learn to cultivate patience..it is something that will serve you well in this journey.
If you take what I said to heart, you will start seeing all sorts of great manifestations that will help carve out the path. You will start realizing things don’t need to change all at once to start feeling better.
Your Turn…
What did you think of this post? Are you someone who is trying to manifest a major overhaul of your life? What resonated with you most here as far as your own journey? Do you have any tips on working with LOA when you are feeling like nothing is right and you want to change it all? Looking forward to your thoughts as always.
I love the way you put it so simply Kelli. The more I read what you write the more parallels I see between LOA and NLP. I think the two could work well together.
Sandy
Hey Sandy
I am glad you enjoyed the post and found the explanations helpful. LOA is a very simple concept but working through our blocks and old ways of thinking and being can be a bit tricky and I try to give people the help they need to do that. I will have to read more about NLP..I know you have mentioned it before. I am sure I will find it interesting and useful.
[ Smiles ] Kelli, I like the part about dropping a hobby or a commitment that is draining us.
Also, when things don’t go our way and we give off hate, more of it returns to our lives in various forms; things like ill health or misfortune.
It is important that we keep our emotions in check; since they play a vital role in manifestation.
Hi Renard
I am glad that resonated with you…seeing ways we can free up our time from things we really don’t want to be doing can be a huge boost to our energy. It can be tricky though because it often involves saying ‘no’ to people that might not like to hear it! It is like a boomerang effect, but not any sort of punishment. If people can realize that, they will realize the degree of control they have in shaping their experience, and that is really empowering. Thanks so much for your comments and great insights as always.
Hi Kelli,
Love your blog! I stumbled upon it this week while trying to figure out what is going on in my life. I’ve been a LOA believer for a long while, but like many of us, I sometimes forget to practice what I know to be the best things for manifesting what I want.
I live as an expat in Mexico, and recently I’ve been having money issues related to banks no longer wanting to allow debit card transactions here due to money laundering and fraud. This one issue has impacted so many areas of my life; it’s made people who don’t really understand the situation angry and frustrated with me, and it’s taken time away from my work–which only makes my money woes worse! This came on the heels of kind of a shitstorm in my life, where my car got rear ended, my previous landlord (I moved) was extorting money from me, my phone stopped working, my computer is on its last legs… I thought with the move I could at least catch my breath and recover a bit, so this hit me out of the blue.
When these cycles hit me, I have a tendency to ask why and focus on what I’ve done to deserve (Catholic upbringing lol) or manifest this. I have come to the conclusion that while some of it is certainly self-manifested, albeit subconsciously, some of it could be due to other forces in play about which I know nothing. I think when we make the agreement to come here in our physical bodies, we agree to a certain set of circumstances that we will face–a mission of sorts, or life lesson. That is to me the definition of karma that gets written out of the LOA, because most people think of karma as a punitive element either within one lifetime or over multiple lifetimes.
And then we are also players in other people’s scenarios and manifestations. So while we think, “Why is this happening to ME?” it could be really all about someone else even more. It seems to me we live at the nexus of our own life purpose (which is to some small degree pre-destined), our own manifestations, and the random crap of the universe that stems from other manifestations and larger scenarios (like the 9/11 disaster–clearly those victims didn’t all manifest that–there was something larger involved).
Anyway, I guess that’s the long way of saying sometimes we just have to say there are things we can control and things we can’t, so be easy on yourself. Let something go, as you say, and just focus on feeling better, which is what we can control. Like Abraham says, reach for the best feeling thought you can, and let that boost you to the next rung on the ladder.
After a horribly frustrating day (again!) on Sunday, I did that, and by Monday evening things were already better. My landlord signed up for Paypal, so I can pay him without need to get cash. I landed two new writing clients, and when I looked in my cupboards, I realized I had enough food for the week, when before I was panicking about running out and not having money to buy groceries. My dogs suddenly started behaving (because I wasn’t a nervous wreck), and my sleep improved.
You know why I think people resist this strategy, myself included? It’s because we confuse feeling better with being okay with or grateful for our life circumstances. I personally get bristly when I’m having a problem and someone says, “You should just be grateful you (fill in anything here).” Well, of course, gratitude is nice. But when you’re whole life is crap, that doesn’t really bring relief or change your vibration. A better response from others or your own mind is something like, “Yes, this DOES suck, but it’s not going to last forever. Give yourself some credit for surviving so far, and go eat a bowl of spaghetti without feeling guilty, or take a couple of hours off work to enjoy the sunset. Forget mopping the floor, and go meditate for an hour. You deserve it!”
I think that’s why gallows humor is so effective sometimes, because it acknowledges the horribleness of a situation (without the sanctimonious “you shouldn’t be complaining” overtones) and gives people a straw to grasp at to improve their vibration through laughter.
Sorry for the long ramble, but your post was very timely, and got me thinking about a lot of stuff! Thank you!
Hey Patricia
I am so glad you enjoy the blog, and don’t apologize for the long comment at all. I enjoy when readers share their experiences and insights. It sounds like you had a lot going on, and I think it is a common thought to wonder what we did to’deserve’ something. It is pretty ingrained that something outside of us is running the show and doling out punishment and reward. But, all that sort of stuff is of the human realm, and the energy is just neutral and our experience is mere feedback.
I too agree that we come here to explore certain themes and that does shape our life experience to some degree, but I always like to remind people that every theme can be explored fully and we are not just meant to experience things that suck. For example, someone who came into a situation of poverty can also experience the full spectrum of the money experience by rising above that and finding a way to be financially prosperous.
Large-scale events like 9/11 were certainly a mass manifestation that reflected the energy of humanity as a whole, but any experience that makes its way into an individual’s orbit did so because they were a match for that experience personally. How are people a match to those types of experiences? I really don’t know, and it would be hard to discern.
You are right about not being able to control everything..the only thing we can control is our focus, and you are so right about going easier on ourselves. I think it is helpful to look at what we can appreciate about our own live now when we are feeling down, but I agree with you that sometimes that is not the best tack and it is just annoying! It’s okay to be dissatisfied with our life as it is now..that sense of contrast helps us figure out what we want. The key is how we go about shifting our mindset so we can become a better match to what we want.
Money situations are stressful, but it sounds like you are already starting to turn things around. It is good you are willing to acknowledge how you feel..that is an important step that people can miss because they think they have to ‘get happy’ immediately and stay in that space for anything good to happen. But, if we are feeling shitty, it’s best to face it.
You sound like you have a pretty good grasp on this whole thing and I am sure you will get some great insights into these manifestations and start to turn things around in that department. Hope to ‘see’ you around more and hear more your insights and experiences.
Hi KC,
Letting go the stuff you need to let go vibes with me.
Firing folks, or letting go worn out relationships, makes room for good feeling matches.
Your mind may fight you but in the end, your mind is NOT you. Control it. Beat it down a bit, let go and grow into a happier way of living.
Spot on points here per usual.
Tweeting from 2 feet next to you, in Bali.
Ryan
Hi Ryan
You are right about getting rid of what no longer serves us to make room for what does. When we realize that is how it works, it is easier to let go of things we are holding onto out of a sense of fear what we really want won’t find its way to us.
Hi Kelli,
I was just talking about this with Adrienne Smith yesterday; about letting go of all emotions, feelings, and anything else that holds us back. You put it so well and clearly and make it sound simple but when we are in the throws of it, it’s sometimes hard to focus on making the change or shifting our mind and emotions to the right set. Great posts and so clearly explained. Great info Kelli.
Have a great week.
Barbara
Hey Barbara
You are right that when we are in the moment, all of this is easier said than done. That is why it is best to just do things gradually instead of trying to force an emotional state that is just too far from where we are now. We can technically make such a shift, but in reality, it tends to be a bit more incremental. Being aware of what is happening and resolving to change it is very powerful within itself, and can get things moving along nicely in the feeling department. As we begin to feel better, we start seeing a different way of being is possible, and even if we aren’t there 100 percent, we know we can get there, and that makes all the difference. Things become lighter.
Hi Kelli
A wonderful post as per usual from you
I received an e-mail from you about your live phone personal coaching sessions and your great offer of participation.
I would to be considered for this please!
My personal problem with manifestation in the LOA is to do with Finance and my inability to gain much more money other than to exist. I have everything that I need but what is lacking is what I want thus my blockage or barrier seem to be with manifesting large amounts of cash.
Now I have tried everything to seek out what is this blockage but without success so far and as you know I am a very positive person and I am happy within. I have manifested many things that I am so grateful but as I already stated the problem is with large amounts of money.
However, I do believe this will happen and for this eventuality I have set everything in place with 3 books published and knocking on the doors of production companies with my TV Scripts; and like I posted to you previously I conned the analogy of this being like creating a snowball and rolling it up a mountainous hill and now it is ready to run down gathering momentum while increasing in size as it goes. But it just needs that final nudge to begin this process and I am hoping that perhaps through you Kelli, I can find how to nudge it successfully.
Yours as always
Dominic
Ireland
Hi Dominic
Money issues are rampant and most of us have some hangups, hence the challenge of manifesting it. I can tell you are making great strides and we can discuss that more in depth on your call.
That analogy is a great one, and perfectly describes the process.
I just read your post again Kelli to centre myself and it made me feel a lot better. As you may remember we are having some slight (read: gigantic) financial problems and I have been successful at translating my panic into ‘it’ll be ok’ but sometimes something sets me off. Like tonight my dad called and offered to help us out financially, as I mentioned yesterday that we were in a spot of bother. I had some huge resistance around that obviously, because I felt really bad after that. I HATE borrowing or taking money from people especially my father because he is on a pension, and it kind of reminded me of how bad things were. Then I started to freak a bit. I had to meditate and release my resistance around that and I read your post. Then I reminded myself of a few things that made me feel better: my payslip came through on email right at that minute (even though it’s a holiday, don’t know how that happened), I got a free parking meter space today (because it ‘s a holiday), my tutoring student paid me for the next two lessons without me asking, and my dad offered to help (which is a good thing really, because I have help if I need it even though I don’t want to take it). Focusing on the positives made me feel a whole lot better and I’d like to think that they are signs that things really will be ok.
Hi Bunny
I am glad the post was helpful. Going back to information that reinforces our more positive perspectives and beliefs can be really helpful, and I highly recommend that to people as a means of overcoming their old conditioning. I do remember you mentioning that was one of your biggest challenges right now…I have been there, and it’s rough terrain for sure. I can relate to that feeling okay and then having a triggering moment that shows that we are still not quite stable. It happens to everyone.
I think a lot of people would feel uncomfortable about taking money in that scenario, and it is a perfect example of how we can get attached to how our manifestations must come, or not valuing certain ones as highly because we didn’t fully ‘create’ it ourselves. But, him offering that money shows your vibration is changing and you are letting in more financial prosperity. Those other situations clearly illustrate that as well.
These are most definitely signs things will be okay. Make sure you celebrate these manifestations and realize YOU are the one who created that with your focus. It can take time to trust the positive manifestations as much as the negative ones, but once that starts building, it gets easier to let things in.
You have a great outlook and a great understanding of LOA and I can tell you are just going to go up and up from here.
Kelli, I found your photo a lot of time on Ryan’s blog and other pro blogger. However, this is the first time that I stayed right here, and read you post.
Honestly, this is life education article that those above tips educated me a lot about how to make better life and life.
Actually, I have did long of things wrong in my whole life. Especially, in last 2 years.
I remembers, I got problem with my wife, women that I really love her. I got divorced, and quite my job. I became a jobless because I feel like I did something wrong with my wife. I gave a lot of job opportunity and staying alone at home.
I feel suck with my life, and every experiences are the nightmare to me.
Some friends advised me to feel better and change to positive thinking. I agree and looking for some ways to change my though. I want to feel better, and I tried to think positive but I could do that because every things not change from the inside.
Thanks for sharing, you teach me a lot about life and living. I will strive my best to feel better and make completely change.
Hi Kimsea
Nice to see you over here at Life Made to Order! Thanks so much for your comment and for sharing your experience. I am so glad you found the article helpful.
I am sorry to hear you are having a hard time. I have experienced times like that when everything was going wrong, and it can be hard to feel better.
Changing your thoughts is good. But, before trying to be more positive, it is okay to say you are not feeling happy now and express your bad feelings. That will make it easier. Just think about what you want to feel like and focus on that. Don’t worry about figuring out specifics right now..that will come to you.
Kelli, thanks for responding and your advise.
Actually, I’m not yet looking for some ways to configure out the problem. However, I’m trying my best to find out what I want to and reach out my goal. I want to response to my life, and my parent.
Right now, I ‘m currently a jobless and looking for some job. However, I could make some few dollar for supporting my coffee cup.
Thanks your advise. I feel like a big motivation, after reading this..! 🙂