So, as some of you may know from my list email or the post I put up last week, I took a bit of a break from blogging because I had a good friend visiting me from New Jersey. My usual routine was shook up, in a good way, and I felt it best to just pull back.
I’ll admit, even though my intuition was telling me that it was the right move, and it felt right, my good old mind was still putting in its two cents, as it’s wont to do with pretty much everything.
Though as you can see from the title of the post, I didn’t totally stop doing everything. I responded to comments, checked email, did some writing work for clients and a few other things. But, I was out and about much more, and did a heck of a lot less than I normally do.
To be honest, I am not usually in any sort of ass-busting mode, but there are a variety of activities I typically occupy myself with.
We went away for a couple of days to another part of the island, and I didn’t even bring my computer. That was big for me. I was really proud of myself.
The core of attraction is how we feel, and not the actions we are taking. But the need to take action and control things is pretty deeply ingrained, and this is one aspect of the process we can really struggle with, myself included.
Over time, I have gotten a lot more comfortable with doing less, but as I keep moving forward, new things pop up that have to be dealt with. Anytime we set our sights on a particular desire, there will be that urge to take certain actions. We may believe we have to do certain things to achieve these goals.
And then we have to engage in a bit of ‘retraining.’ It doesn’t mean you have regressed, it is just part of the process, a process that really doesn’t have an end point.
From the time my last post was published to the day I planned on publishing this one, it would be about two weeks. Considering I post three days a week for the most part, that seemed like a long time to not publish anything, and a lot of content not being written.
New, fresh content is what keeps people coming back right? What if I didn’t get any new readers to my blog because no new posts were being sent to my list or being promoted through the various channels I use?
What if I got lazy, and then had a hard time going back to writing?
Considering the amount of time I took off, these sorts of questions might seem silly, but as we all know, most of our ‘stuff’ is not rational. It often seems silly, but that doesn’t change the fact these concerns are very real, and we must examine them.
I have had enough experience in my personal and professional life to know there really is something to being able to get more by doing less, that it really is about how we feel and not what we are doing.
I highly recommend it, but it isn’t always easy.
Here are a few thoughts I want to share about this aspect of the attraction process and I hope you find it helpful for your own manifesting journey.
Pulling Back from Action is Best in Degrees
We are very ingrained to take lots of action to get the things we want. We always hear about all the things people did to get the things they wanted, all the hard work, all the strategies employed.
So, a concept like law of attraction, which states we actually can get the things we want by becoming an energetic match to them, without really needing to take any sort of action, sounds nice. But going all in is probably not going to happen.
The paradigm of no pain, no gain is pretty entrenched.
Our mind sees doing nothing as being lazy.
So, taking less action is something we usually need to do in degrees to get any real benefit.
The process of stepping fully into an LOA-friendly mindset is just that..a process. It is incremental. And like I always make sure to remind you—incremental does not mean slow.
So, when it comes to pulling back from action, most of us probably won’t be able to go from control freaks and workaholics, to easy breezy manifestors who just let everything they want flow to them, while in a complete state of trust.
We won’t go from hard work, forcing and manipulating to solely actions that are fully inspired, and feel light and effortless, and never anything less.
So, when committing to taking less action, and working more on aligning with what you want on a level of feeling, and building trust, don’t step too far outside your comfort zone.
For example, if you are spending 8 stress-fueled hours a day trying to build your online business, all of a sudden spending one hour a day online will probably be way too big a leap, and will feel way too uncomfortable. Feeling genuinely good about that will probably not happen, and you won’t bank too much positive momentum.
So, you might experiment with cutting it down at first, or be willing to pull back from activities that don’t make you feel as good but you think you have to do, and spend more time doing the things you actually enjoy doing, and feel easier.
For example, maybe you love networking and commenting on other people’s blogs, but are not loving publishing a post five times a week. Experiment with doing more of the former, and changing up the latter.
If you commit to pulling back in a certain way, but you fall off the wagon, don’t get too hard on yourself. Congratulate yourself on the effort and know it can take a bit.
Sometimes the urge to act will just feel too strong. You KNOW you shouldn’t be acting from this space, but you just can’t resist. Things aren’t happening and your mind will convince you that you must get back in the driver’s seat and make shit happen.
It is what it is.
Again, it’s a process and you just have to work on moving forward step by step, not becoming perfect.
Don’t Just Look for Outer Manifestations
And now we come to one of the biggest issues we face when working consciously with law of attraction—not looking to the outside for ‘proof’ what we are doing is working.
This tendency of ours is completely understandable. We got into this whole manifesting thing to create certain things in our reality, so naturally we are waiting on said things to show up.
Manifestations that show us we are on the right track can really boost our trust, and help us ‘keep it up’ energetically speaking.
But, we all know what can result when we look at our current experience, and things still aren’t to our liking.
Because we have our doubts about this whole reduced action part of the equation, we may be doubly on the lookout for outside manifestations. We are looking for the Universe to ‘prove’ to us this is how it actually works.
I definitely had some great manifestations happen over this period, and I definitely think my relaxed attitude towards ‘doing stuff’ played a big role.
But, I certainly wasn’t being bombarded with one awesome thing after another to the point I couldn’t catch my breath.
I realize there were certain things I was hoping would happen but didn’t—good old attachment and expectations at play. I am not immune to this.
But, I also realized that a lot more happened than I was noticing. I manifested lots of things that really gave me clarity and lots of other goodies on a level of energy, thought and feeling.
During this time, I found it easier to remain in a positive line of thinking, and had less ‘negative’ chatter. I felt more trust. Not taking action in certain areas felt a lot more comfortable. I just felt a greater sense of everything being taken care of and the Universe having my back. I was more relaxed.
It is easy to forget that feeling better on a more consistent basis, and getting a better handle on effectively working with attraction, is a manifestation just like anything else. All of this is a reflection of our energy raising, and the ‘muck’ loosening its grip.
And that is where all the magic happens. We are making big ass shifts here in this work and these are victories to be celebrated.
Don’t ever discount your changing mindset ,and overall belief system, as insignificant because your ‘stuff’ still isn’t here.
Discomfort Will Pop Up, But If You Stick with It, You’ll Do Lots of Clearing
Nothing will bring up your blocks, fears, lack of trust and the old way of thinking like deliberately pulling back from action, and not doing things you are convinced you ‘must’ or ‘should’ do to bring about a certain manifestation.
Doing a lot less felt pretty good overall, but there were certainly uncomfortable moments that popped up here and there.
Like anyone else, my mind can mess with me, and I realized there were lots of attachments, expectations, judgments and what have you that I either didn’t really know I had, or that were still a lot stronger than I thought.
We all have our triggers.
That’s the thing about doing this work..you are really never ‘done.’ As your understanding deepens, your trust builds, and you move further down the path, stuff is going to pop up as you keep going for more and more.
You may have done lots of clearing in one area of your life, but when you set your sights on a manifestation in a different area , you may find yourself dealing with some of those same beliefs, but with a different angle.
Or you will discover a whole new set of limiting beliefs that weren’t being triggered with other desires.
Or, as you reach for bigger and bolder things, you will have to do some more clearing to become a better match to these grander aspirations, things you probably never thought possible for you before.
If you can withstand the discomfort, and not just run right back to action, no matter how badly or ineffective it feels, because it will quell the discomfort and make you feel more in control, oh the insights to be gained, and the clearing to be done.
You will be given an opportunity to really see what has been blocking what you want, and formulate a ‘plan of attack’ to deal with it.
You will get a clearer idea of what you really want, and it may not be what you have been thinking this whole time, and that can be a game-changer as for how you move about your day, where you focus your energy, and what specific manifestations you set your sights on.
Make Sure You Have Some Feel-Good Stuff to Keep You Occupied
Like I mentioned earlier, the reason I pulled back a lot and was not doing much of anything was because I had a friend visiting me. So, everyday I was out and about, showing her the sights, and getting back in touch with why I love it here so much. Sometimes I am guilty of forgetting how awesome what I am doing is.
I had plenty of feel-good stuff to keep me busy. This particular friend and I have really good conversations and can talk about anything and everything for hours on end.
I was in a really high-vibe much of the time. I was having lots of fun.
I wasn’t just sitting around twiddling my thumbs, and looking for a way to fill my time.
Technically we don’t have to find any way to fill our time. We could just sit around basking in the glow of knowing the good old Universe will take care of us.
But, with that monkey mind of ours, and our lack of complete trust in the process, it would behoove us to have some ideas on hand as far as things to do that make us feel good.
This is a very individual thing. Do whatever works for you. It can be any activity, whether walking in the park or binge watching a TV series on Netflix. If it makes you feel happy, less stressed, relaxed, joyful or any other warm fuzzy, it’s a go.
In Closing…
This period of reduced activity was very interesting. I manifested some cool stuff, and I learned a lot. I felt like I reached a new level of trust and made some interesting and extremely helpful realizations.
I got lots of inspirations and intuitive nudges, and I look forward to implementing them.
I know a lot of people may be afraid that if they pull back and stop doing as much, they will eventually stop doing anything, and what they want won’t come. But, the Universe knows what we want..it is written all over our vibrations.
And, you will probably end up taking all sorts of actions, but they will be coming from a different space. They will feel good and right. They won’t feel hard and like you are swimming upstream.
You will get more accomplished while doing less. You will attract all sorts of things without the manifestation having any direct correlation to a specific action.
If you have been acting from a space of doubt, fear, force, control or manipulation, be willing to work on pulling back.
When you feel compelled to take certain actions, examine the motivating force before proceeding.
Set an intention that you will start to trust more, and inspired action will come,.
Your Turn…
What did you think of the post? Did anything in particular resonate with you? What drives your uninspired actions? Do you have any tips for navigating this aspect of attraction? What are your favorite actions for getting into a better feeling space?
Hi Kelli,
Glad you are back, I’ve really missed your posts.
I’ve been feeling pretty shitty for the past few days as a result of taking an action that at the time seemed “inspired” but, on reflection, just came from a need to control and manipulate a situation to get a specific result. I won’t get into the specifics, it’s a complicated story, but suffice to say that this action didn’t get me the result I hoped for, quite the opposite actually! And now I’m feeling quite upset thinking I’ve messed this up and my manifestation won’t show up, ever. I’ve messed up that badly, believe me!
I guess my question is, can an “uninspired” action derail a manifestation permanently? Is it best to just move on? I have seriously considered giving up, things were going very well, but I really do feel that my action was the final nail in the coffin for my manifestation. I’m sorry I must sound terribly over-dramatic and immature haha, but this is the place where I’m at now. I would really appreciate any feedback you might have.
Thank you!
Hi Noa
We really can’t ever mess anything up, so don’t worry about that. All the results we get are merely ‘vibrational feedback’ and there is always something to be gained from the manifestation. We can always get what we want, but it may not always look like we think it should or be the exact manifestation we have our sights set on–such as dating a specific person or getting a specific job.
Just pay attention to whatever it is you are feeling as a result of this manifestation–that will clue you in to what may have led you to take this action and what still needs to be cleaned up a bit. You seem to already have some insight as to why you acted that way, and that will be very helpful.
We are always moving towards what we want–buying into that premise is key obviously, or else anything unwanted would just totally derail us each and every time and we wouldn’t be able to let the thing in. Without knowing the specifics of what you are trying to manifest, I can’t really say whether you should give up or move on….chances are, you may have set your sights on one channel of getting what you want and you want to realize there are infinite ways to get what you want. And in the case of relationships–there is never just one person who fits the bill and is the only path to a happy relationship if that is the issue at hand.
You don’t sound dramatic or immature at all..you are just being honest with how you feel, and that is key to working through it, and getting unstuck.
Remember that what you want is a feeling, and whatever you have your sights set on now is just one representation of that energy.
Thank you very much Kelli.
Without going into specifics, a man I deeply cared for (and who I thought cared for me) has rejected me in quite a cruel, heartless way. I used the law of attraction to manifest him and everything was going very smoothly, I was happy and confident, I felt good about myself, my limiting beliefs were melting away nicely, but out of nowhere he just disappeared on me with no word or explanation, and I just don’t understand what I did wrong.
I think I need to step away from law of attraction work and “lick my wounds” so to speak. I’m feeling emotionally exhausted and my self-esteem (not to mention my pride as a woman) has taken a severe blow. He was my life. I hope I can get back into law of attraction at some point, but I really am feeling utterly useless at it, I gave it a real, honest go, but ultimately I failed and got the nastiest cruellest result you can imagine. What’s up with that? Was it all my fault?
Sorry to put such a downer on things, but I am hurting so badly… thank you again for all your help.
Hi Noa
Relationships are tough when it comes to the attraction process because we have a really hard time detaching from outcomes–i.e the specific people as being the ‘one.’ and not seeing them for what else they may represent in helping us manifest a great relationship.
You see yourself as ‘failing’ because in your mind you manifested him to be the person you would have this wonderful relationship with, and it didn’t work out that way, but this manifestation was clearly to show you something else. We can never fail or do anything wrong..everything that happens to us is purely vibrational feedback and nothing more.
Like pretty much everyone, your happiness and view of yourself improved because someone else seemed to see something good in you, and anytime we get those outside boosts, they really can’t last because the shift really didnt come from within. Our vibration and belief system may get a bit of a boost because of the situation but ultimately it can’t be sustained because that is not how we really feel about ourselves, at least predominantly (we all have self-esteem/self-worth issues to some degree.) So, eventually, the ‘yuck’ will get mirrored back to us in some way.
It may feel too painful to really dissect what happened now from an energy perspective, and that’s okay But, when you feel ready, pay attention to how this situation makes you feel, any memories that surface–they are of the same energy and beliefs so they are very relevant, and you will get a clearer idea of why you manifested this, and use that information to move forward and find a better match. It could even be this person, but I suspect there is someone better for you, and this was a major manifestation to clear out some big ‘stuff’ in the romance department.
If it feels good to you to step away from doing the ‘work’ honor that feeling because we always want to follow what makes us feel better. You won’t stop attracting–that includes the good stuff–as LOA is always working and always has been, well before we were aware this was how our reality actually operated. Manifesting something unwanted is par for the course and part of the process for getting what we actually want..you are not useless at it by a long shot. In fact, such a monster manifestation shows there is a lot of energy flowing, but you just need to get it going in a better direction. That you are aware of attraction puts you in a very good position to turn things around as most people have no idea why their life is the way it is and they just keep creating completely unconsciously.
You didn’t fail at anything..believe me. You just got really attached to a specific outcome. I too have had that sort of broken heart and I was convinced I would never get over that person. But, I met my husband who is a million times better match than this person could ever be. That situation gave me a lot of clarity and was a major catalyst in manifesting this great relationship.
Like you said, go lick your wounds and let yourself feel all the feelings, especially any anger (not at yourself). That emotion in particular can really get us stuck energetically when we suppress it.
I know you feel like shit now, but this manifestation has huge potential to help you get what you really want, which isn’t him…your mind will fight you on that one, but try to remember that.
It made me feel good, Kelli, that you also get these “I’m not doing enough” feelings! I also like to take some time off on the weekends and sometimes I worry about getting enough done. The ‘monkey mind’ can get to me sometimes. It’s good to know to this beginner that you also get similar thoughts and feelings.
Thanks for sharing them!
Sue
Hi Sue
I certainly do! It is good you take that time to pull back. It really is the best thing we can do, but as you know, the mind will fight it. We are very conditioned to think succeeding involves lots of suffering and hard work, and that it somehow makes us more ‘deserving’ of the end result. We will act, but it always doesn’t have to be from a space of feeling stressed or overwhelmed. Getting aligned with what we want on a level of feeling can cut back the physical effort considerably.
Hello Kelly,
I haven’t wrote in my blog in a minute. I am going to get back to it but I have been doing other things. The not doing enough is something that I really resonate with. Sometimes, I just shut the computer down and be like that is all I am done for the day. This really helps.
You are right we always feel like we have to do something. Because we are told that you don’t get something for nothing at a young age and you have to work your butt off to get it. I know that we have to reverse this way of thinking. Not saying that we don’t have to work but do your work and trust that Allah (God) will take care of the rest.
Thanks for sharing this with us! I really enjoy reading your blog posts they are always very inspiring and they always come at the right time. 🙂
Hi Maketta
It is great you are able to pull back when you feel the urge to do so. It is easy to get sucked into the idea that we must keep pushing through, and while that may net us some good results eventually, it usually isn’t the most effective or enjoyable way. Doing this work with attraction in some ways can slow progress because we have some stuff to clear out, but I prefer that to getting faster results from working super super hard and not enjoying any of it.
That trust we are being supported is very helpful in acting more effectively and from a space of inspiration, and cultivating that is a very worthwhile use of our time.
I am so glad you enjoy the posts and you find them helpful. It always makes me so happy to hear that.
Hi Kelli,
You questions don’t seem silly at all. When you get used to doing something or attribute it to getting to a certain level, you start to wonder how things would be if you stopped. Even the littlest thing could have a profound impact.
Whenever I don’t notice too much change outside I look within. Typically because at the point I’m wondering if anything is happening and it usually is. No matter how little I acknowledge it.
~Lea
Hi Lea
Thanks..it is funny what our mind comes up with. You are right about looking within to see what might be affecting our outside results.After all, the outer world is simply a mirror of all of that. Thanks for your insights.
Hi KC,
Happy you saw it through 😉
The inner shift is oh so key; glad you noted that.
Letting go helps me change my feelings so I need not SEE anything to feel good.
It’s like an inside-out deal instead of an outside-in deal.
Fab post, super break, and of course, tweeting from Bali.
Ryan
Hi Ryan
Feeling good despite not seeing anything outside ‘happening’ is a challenge for sure, but as our trust builds, it becomes easier to do that because we know what we want will come in perfect time. We also know anything that seems contrary to our desire is there to serve us and help move us long.
Hi Kelli
After looking the title of the post, I was thinking about the content because you are talking about the insights by doing nothing.
But, I am completely surprised by your insights. It’s great that you enjoyed your trip without any computer.
I think that we can learn a lot from doing nothing. In this process, we understand things in broad manner. As you have taken away some intuitive nuggets from your trip, we all must take a break.
I completely agree with your wagon point. We don’t need to be hard on ourselves. Otherwise, we won’t develop a connection with our work. Then everything looks dull.
We don’t need to rush in because we won’t get anything in return.
Thanks for providing this wonderful post. Looking forward to your future post also.
Hi Yatin
So glad you enjoyed the post. I agree we can learn a lot by pulling back. Like you said, we can get a better grasp of the bigger picture. I like the title of your post in the Comluv..I look forward to checking it out to see what you have to say.
Thanks for appreciating the title of the post. I also look forward to your wonderful thoughts on the blog.
Hey
Just read it and left a comment. Great post!
Hi Kelli
I really missed your posts so I am glad you are back. It was really good that you had the time off to spend with your friend and get away from your routine. Loved this post, it gives me lots to think about. It demonstrated how ‘going with the flow’ as I like to call it, manifests some great stuff that you didn’t expect. That’s one of my mottos lately, no matter what happens, don’t fight it, just go with it, find something good and positive about it and just get into the habit of doing that. Yesterday I got on the wrong bus home, I freaked a bit, but then I thought, don’t fight it just go with where it takes me. I don’t know why I manifested that, but in the end it wasn’t a big deal and where I got off my husband just came and picked me up after I called him.
Tonight I lay down to meditate and I used my white light visualisation to wash away the negativity from the day, and guess what? I realised (after A LOT of time and practice getting to this point) that I actually DID NOT have a negative thought or experience ALL DAY. I could hardly believe it. I have been actively grateful for everything in my life and my outer reality is reflecting that. I feel great when I get up in the morning, my new colleagues are all fantastic, my day just flows, I have had some great ideas….I feel great about everything. And when I get home my husband who insisted for years that he would NEVER cook, was cooking dinner and had done all the shopping and housework – a miracle in itself that once I never dreamed would happen! The perfect day!!
Hi Bunny
I am so glad you enjoyed the post. You have such a great attitude towards things and that bus manifestation is a perfect example of how we can keep our energy stable if we just see the situation for what it is….yeah, it’s annoying but it wasn’t the end of the world and you just called your husband for a ride. Getting better at handling those types of snafus can make a big difference in our energy throughout the day. That is quite the feat and you should be proud of that.
Isnt it amazing how our internal energy shifts can impact other people’s behavior even though we really aren’t directly doing anything to make them act that way? One of the oft-forgotten benefits of working with LOA. We are so focused on getting out ‘stuff’ we forget about those kinds of manifestations. I am excited to keep hearing about all your great manifestations..you are really moving along quite nicely!
Hi Kelli, I enjoyed your post. It can feel really hard to just do nothing sometimes, you get scared that it means you’ll stall your manifestations or stop them all together. But sometimes the right thing to do is to take a break. I think your suggestion of cutting down on actions is a good one.
I’m glad to hear that you enjoyed your break. And it’s nice that you’re back, I’m going to go and read your other new posts in a minute. 🙂
Hi there
I am so glad you liked it. You are right that it can feel a bit uncomfortable because of that fear. It is so ingrained that we must always be taking action, but when that action is not feeling good, it is kind of counterproductive. We may get some results but our fruits don’t have to be that hard won. That is why I suggested the incremental nature of doing less so we can get comfortable with it. And when we take those breaks,inspired actions tend to strike and that works to appease our mind in a sense.
Hey Kelli,
Just loved the post it was a powerful post on attracting what You want yet it may manifest in a totally different direction from where You expected. That was such when dating before met own wife, who came from unexpected source on its own. From the same means as another relationship yet the person was someone totally different from those who had meet. Today we are married.
Also allowing a routine to be interrupted at times yes it can be a learning curve as will be own honeymoon coming up in a few weeks, where will be away for 4 weeks. The longest will have been away, yet those demons do come out and start attempting to gain control. As own friends say its taking control of them pushing those fears aside and saying this is what I am going to do.
Have an amazing day,
Ben
Hi Ben
So glad you liked the post. It is so interesting to see how certain people and situations came into our lives from out of nowhere and we couldn’t have figured it out with our mind. It can be uncomfortable when we step away from things for awhile because we worry what may happen if we aren’t constantly monitoring, taking action,etc…but this break will be a great thing for you. Lots of insights and inspirations will come and you’ll see how things don’t just fall apart if we step away for a bit. Have fun on your honeymoon!