Of all the ‘skills’ worth developing in life, this one is right at the top.
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Links of Interest
Podcast #191: Getting More Comfortable with Uncomfortable Feelings
Podcast #191: Getting More Comfortable with Uncomfortable Feelings
Heartfelt condolences on the passing of your mother, Kelli. No matter what issues we may have had, if any, we only get one.
Thank you so much Joyce. You are right…there is only one. I felt very fortunate to have had a very loving one with whom I had a very good relationship.
I lost a brother to suicide and drugs three years ago and eventually my mom said death should be a celebration of the life that person did get to have and that we should look back on all the joy we got to experience with them. Your moms in a great place now and I’m sure you’ll get to see her again someday in some form
Hi Jaden
Thanks so much for your comment and sharing your experience. Your mom is certainly right about that. I am so sorry about the circumstances around your brother’s death. I think experiencing the death of people close to us is a particularly powerful opportunity to put into practice a lot of the wisdom we collect on this journey.
Hi Kelli.
I have also lost my mum 12 years ago. She was a manipulate narcissist and life was very stressful. Her death was a relief. Even though I am a mum myself, Mother’s Day for the next 10 years after she passed was just a yucky day (I actually hated mothers day with a passion). Too many mixed emotions. I had psychological counselling for 10 years on and off with several psychologists to handle what I’d been through.
But now, emotions have settled. I have enjoyed the last couple of Mother’s Days. Memories of mum are of more happier times.
It is definitely full on what a death can bring up.
Hi Joanne
Thank you for sharing your experience. I am sure a lot of people who had difficult relationships with their parents can relate to that feeling of relief. I feel fortunate I had a really good relationship with my mom but there were some elements of it that were stressful–after my dad died, she changed in a lot of ways that made me worry about her a lot and it was a big source of emotional ‘ick’ for me. So I’m sure in time, I will also feel that sort of relief. Anytime a stressful situation resolves itself, it is natural to feel that and it can cause a lot of guilt but it is nothing to feel guilty about. Life is complicated, relationships are complicated and all the feelings that creates are complicated too! I am glad to hear that you were able to find some healing and move past it. These sorts of experiences present tremendous opportunities for growth and if we are up for the challenge, it can transform us in so many ways we probably couldn’t imagine.
Memorial Day in the United States today. Not that war is desirable nor always acceptable but especially when you think of World War II and how astronomically high the stakes were at the time. Although there was much carnage and destruction, the outcome proved to be for the greatest good I believe. We know now what the outcome has been, but imagine the uncertainty people experienced at the time. D-Day, for example could not have been comfortable for the guys storming Omaha Beach but for the most part they we’re compelled to take that pivotal action. I think for a lot of us life can be pleasantly boring to routinely fun and exciting but then we face junctures where it becomes a matter of life or death and we are changed once again forever. Honestly I agree with you Kelly we just have to feel our feelings but at the same time it’s about putting one foot in front of the other. Life compels you to do it otherwise you wallow and get stuck in depression and gloom. Been there, done that. Much love to you Kelly everything you say resonates with what I feel and helps me to move forward too. Thank you and keep on walking.
Thank you so much for your insightful comment. I agree with everything you said. I think this is a great reminder too that in the past, the world went through many situations that were very scary and affected large amounts of people. That everything is getting worse in these days is not necessarily true. Sure we face many new challenges but I do think we will correct course as necessary over time.