As I always say, the theory and reality of manifesting can be worlds apart. One of the ‘realities’ we may be contending with energetically is resisting the changes we consciously want because a part of us believes the unwanted and our struggles are actually good for us in some way.
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Podcast #116: Law of Attraction: How is the Unwanted in Your Life Serving You?
Wow! I’ve become aware of my resistance to a relationship due a belief that I will lose myself/freedom in a relationship. This audio came along at the perfect time…
Hi Margaret! So nice to see you on here…I was actually thinking about you and wondering how you were. I am glad the content was timely. The interesting thing about the blocks is they can often seem very cliched and obvious, and it is easy to dismiss them for that reason. But the most pressing issues tend to be these more universal things, not more complicated, complex hidden ‘stuff.’ When we manifest a relationship from that ‘cleaner’ energy, and realize we can manifest one on our own terms, these sorts of worries tend to fade because we know the relationship doesn’t have to contain these unwanted elements.
Your posts are like spiritual treats. Thank you for covering very imp point here. Many times we forget to think about this.
Many times I feel that do I ‘really’ want something or I just ‘think’ I want. Am I really going to be fine with all the changes that thing will bring in my life or i am wanting to feed my ego.
I am going through very good change of life. Whatever energies I been working on are really giving me results and when I have least expected. Best thing happen to me is that now maximum times I am aware about my thoughts. I was totally depressed once but now I hardly get angry. I started recording incidents when I am feeling negative emotions on daily basis. And for my surprise I have changed a lot.
The moment I stopped pushing against life and just started paying attention towards my inner word things started to move faster. It feels crazy sometimes the way manifestations unfold. But it’s all good. Feels wonderful. Thank you so much for all the insights you share and most importantly for sending uplifting energy.
Hi Rhea
Thanks so much for your lovely comment and sharing such great insights as usual. I love what you said about when you stopped pushing against, things really turned around. That ‘pushing against’ makes sense with our action-oriented approach to change because that dissatisfaction is what drives the action, it is what motivates us. But that is a really hard way to go things and it can be easier. When we work from a space of consciously managing energy, it becomes very clear pretty quickly that this ‘pushing against’ doesn’t offer the same benefit.
Once again, Kelli is on target! So insightful. But what to do? I see it, I know it, but it’s gridlock…one part of me holding on for dear life based on an accumulation of experiences. Formerly a risk taker, now I refuse to take the jump. Real me wants to, to move forward. The other part of me is totally dug in. I’ve seen it for a while but have no good response to myself, because who knows really, what’s on the other side. Gutsy all my life, I’ve run out of guts. And sure enough….nothing moves in my life.
So, what do we do.
Hi Eva
Thanks so much for your comment and I am glad you found the podcast helpful. In my experience, the more ‘stuck’ I feel, the more I am really resisting something that I am not admitting to, resisting a change I really know I need to make,etc… My mind will convince me I don’t know what the problem is, but I actually do. Also, I would say that relief can come, you can get things moving in a new direction even if it is a smaller change. It doesn’t necessarily have to be some big, bold move that requires a lot of courage,etc… When it comes to changing our reality by way of changing our energy and focusing differently, even small things can make a big difference.
This has popped up a couple times for me recently so I’m taking notice… I realized if I start going after my career goals, my free time and therefor comfort will be threatened. So I’m thankful for that epiphany… but what now? Do I force myself out of my comfort zone? That seems like going against the grain. Is just an awareness of it enough?
Hi Caitlin
Awareness of these beliefs and feelings alone can change our energy as simply setting an intention to transform them and release them already gets the ball rolling on it. The thing that will be most helpful is exploring the beliefs you have about pursuing your career goals that feel badly to you. For example, you might think you must work really hard to get what you want and that doesn’t feel good. When we realize it is our energy that creates our experience, we see that we can pursue the things we want on our own terms, we don’t have to play bu the ‘rules’ that are based on limiting, fear-based thinking,etc… Most of the things we really want lie outside our comfort zone so doing things that feel scary and what not is usually going to be part of the journey. The key is honoring your energy now and not doing anything that will cause so much resistance it will consume you and undermine any attempts to focus and feel in a way that serves you better. For example, if someone has severe money anxiety, just quitting their job immediately with barely any money in the bank might not be the best idea. Just focus on how you want to feel, how you want that journey to feel and once you activate that vibe more strongly, you can then see what you feel inspired to do from there.
This is so true. I studied it in a behavioral science class with regards to habits and changing behavior. A person needs to want to change, believe they can change, and believe they should.
I want a different story but I am afraid of ruffling feathers. I know who other people want me to be and it feels like I have to completely leave everyone behind in order to be myself. And I don’t want to be alone in my struggles or triumphs.
I listen to a lot of Abraham Hicks and I think they would tell me I have let it go. At least if I do what I really want I’m more likely to find people to celebrate with on my path.
Hi Charlotte
Thanks for your comment and sharing your experience. Your fear is very understandable and I think very common…though many of us might not realize it until we explore our energy a bit more deeply. Whether or not you have to leave people behind is not something that can be known from the outset–would really depend on the individual circumstances, such as the change someone is seeking and the exact conflicts with others. It is always a possibility but often not as inevitable as people think. Even if others may not understand our choices and perspectives, even if they are not on the same ‘journey’ it doesn’t mean they wouldn’t be able to be in our life at all. I for example, maintain plenty of good relationships with people who aren’t interested in these topics or personal growth in general, lead very different lives than I do, etc…and things are just fine. And you are right…you WILL ABSOLUTELY meet people who are on your wavelength, who will understand and support. Sometimes it may not be the people we want it to be, but over time, we learn to deal with that.
Thanks Kelli. Its true, I have been meeting people and even found jobs that were directly aligned to who I am. God is always sending me songs and hints that I’m on the right path but deep set notions are difficult to uproot. I’ve been trying to do more work on releasing my personal blocks with the realization that so much of my life has been split between being who I am but stopping short of alienating people who aren’t interested in or ready for my authentic self. My core belief about my family and my belief about my obligation to them is keeping me from living an abundant life. I’m even realizing now that “abundance” in this sense is having a rich community that I feel connected to and supported by.
Looking back at my first comment its like “no wonder this isn’t working out for me! Why would I want option B if I’ve internalized it as losing everything in option A?” Definitely could stand to shift that story.
Hi Charlotte
Thanks for your comment and sharing your experience. You seem to be a very insightful person an aware of your motivations and what is holding you back. That is actually most of the battle as once we discover these fears and other kinks, it basically comes down to deciding to let them go in favor of what will serve us. The more genuine our willingness to do this, the easier it is. When we hold back from who we really are because we don’t want to make waves with other people, it can surely make things easier in one sense since we may be avoiding judgment, conflict,etc…but we pay a high price for it. Being ourselves is not always easy but in my experience, I would rather take the ‘problems’ that come with that because at least we are doing things that make us happy, we are not experiencing the immense ‘ick’ that builds up from not living authentically, and over time we make peace with any issues our family or others close to us might have about our choices.