Law of Attraction: What Makes a ‘Good’ Manifestor?

I’m just wondering, what would you say are the important characteristics for a successful manifestor to have. Like, the ability to embody what you want, (like feel it in your body), to let go of “how,” and to believe it can and will happen? Just wondering what you would say, my LoA guru!

I loved this question because it allows me to talk about one of the things I love talking about most, which are the misconceptions about this teaching, the misunderstandings we tend to have about what ‘manifesting’ is, what is ‘required’ of us, what actually creates the energetic shifts that lead to changes in our external experience. 

The good news is, this whole ‘manifesting’ thing isn’t as hard or mysterious as we tend to think it is. 

Can’t Do It Right or Wrong

‘Manifesting’ isn’t an action. There is no ‘skill’ to it. It is not something one person can be more adept at than another. There aren’t different strategies you must employ. There aren’t ways to do it ‘faster’ or more ‘effectively’ than another. There aren’t tools or techniques that work better than others. 

Because it is not something based on action, on skill, etc…it is not something that can be done ‘right’ or ‘wrong.’ Because it is not an action, a set of skills, there is nothing to learn. We are always asking ‘how’ to do it, but there is no ‘how’ to it. 

The way the teaching is often described, we get the impression it is some sort of action-based process, something you weren’t ‘doing’ before, which is why you didn’t have the stuff you wanted, and now you can ‘use’ the law of attraction to improve things. 

It becomes synonymous with saying affirmations, making vision boards and other types of ‘doing,’ again, creating the impression it is an action-based process. And we get preoccupied with things like whether we are saying affirmations ‘correctly,’ saying them enough, whether our visualizations have enough detail, the right kind of details. 

We make general personal growth way too action-oriented in my opinion, and it’s even worse for ‘manifesting’ in particular. We get way too hung up on tools and techniques. We plow through program after program about manifesting this thing, or that thing, that tend to be very heavy on specific routines and rituals that have no power in and of themselves.

We try everything under the sun and nothing ‘works’ and we are left feeling like we must be doing something ‘wrong,’ like we must be missing something, like we must not be ‘good’ at it. And we often end up feeling worse than we did before we knew about all this stuff because we let ourselves hope, and get excited, that things may be different, and talk about a let down. 

And to top it off, we have stirred up all sorts of emotional shit we don’t know how to deal with, that we try to avoid dealing with. And the attachment to the manifestations becomes even more intense because we see it as the ticket to making it all go back dormant again. 

Got a bit off topic there, but back to the main point–you can’t be a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ manifestor in the way your mind is probably thinking. Again, you can’t do it ‘right’ or ‘wrong.’ 

If we want to think in these terms of being ‘good’ at it, I think there are just two things —yes, just two things— with which we need to concern ourselves. I think there are merely two characteristics of ‘good’ manifestors.

Characteristic One

I always like to say words like ‘vibration’ and ‘energy’ are just fancy words for feelings, so the key to being a ‘good’ manifestor’, is tending to your emotional health, prioritizing its cultivation for its own sake, over simply trying to ‘raise your vibe’ so you can attract what you don’t have.

As I see it, there are only two things we really need to focus on to feel better, and be a happier person, that will also naturally ‘benefit’ the pursuits of our ego/personality self–don’t worry, you still get to have your stuff!

The first thing we need to ‘do’ is consciously choose our belief system, the root of our feelings. They don’t come out of nowhere–they come from what we believe, how we see ourselves, how we see the world, the narratives the mind is telling about our past and present circumstances, especially as they relate to the future. 

So a ‘good’ manifestor will choose to believe things that feel good, trusting our emotional responses to different beliefs and perspectives is a way to evaluate their validity. The formula is simple–things that feel good are true and things that feel badly are false. They reject the ego thought system and embrace the ‘God, Spirit, Universe’ thought system.

A few examples of what a ‘good’ manifestor would believe: 

Everything that happens serves us, and is a great opportunity for growth ,and aligning more deeply with our more desired circumstances, by giving us a chance to explore, and release, beliefs and emotions that don’t serve us.

The Universe/God/whatever other term you like is a benevolent force that is always arranging things for the highest good

Having trust and faith everything works out exactly as it is supposed to

Our sheer existence–and not anything we do or contribute–makes us worthy and deserving

Our circumstances aren’t responsible for our feelings and we can start feeling better any time we choose

Our past experience has no bearing on what is possible for the future since it was all just energy and we can change that. 

The manifestations aren’t the answer to our emotional problems so we shouldn’t feel so attached to getting them

If you believed these sorts of things, how would you feel overall? If you believed these sorts of things, how would you feel about yourself? If you believed these sorts of things, how would you feel about past and present circumstances your mind may not like?

If you believed these sorts of things, you would probably feel pretty good most of the time, and if your point of attraction is your dominant emotional state, that would bode well for your ‘manifesting.’ 

Characteristic Two

A ‘good’ manifestor is absolutely committed to dealing with her emotional shit. And the more this is motivated by improving emotional health overall, and not just as a means to an end, yet another ‘tool’ your mind thinks you can use to get your ‘stuff’ the ‘better’ a manifestor you will be. 

So why is it so important to deal with your feelings? Because bad feelings feel badly and again, if ‘vibration’ and ‘energy’ are just fancy words for feelings, they will pose a number of issues for the conscious creator. 

Remember, manifesting isn’t an action. It’s not vision boards, affirmations, letters to the Universe asking for your stuff, gratitude lists and so on. Manifesting may be a verb but it’s not an action. Manifesting is about what we are ‘being.’ The point of all that stuff is to help transform your ‘being.’

The mind doesn’t get that and thinks the performing of these various tools is the point–do enough and eventually you’ll see some movement. But that isn’t how it goes with energy work, but I digress. 

You have always been ‘creating’ by way of your dominant energetic state–you just didn’t know it. So long as you are living and breathing, you are sending out some sort of energetic ‘signature’ into the world and receiving accordingly. 

The reason so many people struggle with changing their circumstances by way of energetic ‘shifting’ is because nothing has changed energetically. All the emotional crap that was dominating their ‘vibe’ is still there. The very energies that contributed to your financial problems, weight gain, bad relationships, familial conflicts,etc…are still going strong. 

Everyone is so busy trying to just ‘get happy’ and ‘raise’ their vibe, not paying a lick of attention to the energy they brought to the table. Don’t get me wrong–there is certainly value in trying to adopt more positive perspectives,etc…but this actually won’t be the core of the work for most of us.

These little ‘wisps’ of positive energy we may cultivate here and there don’t stand a chance against these other deeply ingrained energies that have a shit ton of momentum behind them. 

When we don’t deal with the bad feelings that are almost certainly making us want what we want, we get stuck ‘manifesting’ from ‘pain-minimizing’ mode which just makes us more focused on the pain, that just amplifies it. 

Truly feeling a sense of detachment from the money, the boyfriend, or whatever else, will forever feel elusive because the mind believes you can’t be happy unless things change. How can you ever feel detached from something, feel at peace with where you are now, when you truly believe all this pain will never go away unless things change? 

The only way to be in that detached state, the only way to truly start feeling better ,now no matter what is happening, the only way to enter into that state of trust, faith and surrender, is dealing with the feelings, seeing where they are really coming from. 

We have to understand the way we feel right now really isn’t about what we have or don’t have. There is something else at play here. We aren’t upset about not having a boyfriend, not having the money, not having the better job, about the struggle with our weight; we are upset because there is a story our mind is telling about these circumstances that hurts like a bitch. 

And if we just get that thing, then these bad things we think about ourselves will not be true. If we just get these things, all these additional things we worry about happening if we don’t, won’t happen. 

If you want to be a ‘good’ manifestor, the type that has all those magical seeming experiences where things happen truly effortlessly, that feel ‘miraculous,’ you have to get serious about dealing with your pain. If you want to truly be happy, which is the only thing you actually care about, this is a non-negotiable. 

When you get at the root of why you feel the way you feel, and you see it actually has nothing to do with your circumstances, this burning sense of ‘need’  you may feel now for X, Y or Z fades away. The ‘need’ transforms into a mere ‘preference’ which is much easier to allow in. 

Again, if ‘energy’ and ‘vibration’ are just fancy words for feelings, imagine the type of ‘signature’ you are putting out into the world when it is not weighed down by all the suppressed emotion we have been working so hard to keep stuffed down? Imagine letting go of the bitterness, anger, resentment, fear, anxiety? Imagine what it would feel like to give up the absolutely exhausting task of avoiding your feelings constantly and pretending you are fine when you aren’t? What do you think that would do for your ‘vibration?’

Imagine the type of ‘signature’ you are putting out into the world when you no longer look to the outside to make yourself happy, when you are no longer waiting on things to change before giving yourself permission to feel better? You dealt with all the pain ,and transformed all the beliefs, that freed you from the delusion that getting a new boyfriend, making more money ,or losing 20 pounds, would make any iota of difference in your level of happiness, in how you viewed yourself.

Imagine the type of ‘signature’ you are putting out into the world when you are no longer in a state of resistance to ‘what is’ right now? You accept the moment as it is, let it teach you what it needs to teach you, knowing it is serving you in some way. You release on expectations, and specific outcomes, knowing if something didn’t work out the way you wanted it to, doesn’t mean anything went wrong. You just shake that shit off and move on.

If you are willing to go to those icky places inside ,and deal with all those bad feelings, I promise you, you will be njot just a ‘good’ manifestor, but one of the ‘best.’ 

Supporting These two tasks

So, we have seen the crux of ‘successful’ manifesting really only consists of tending to the two things that impact your feeling state, which is your point of attraction–consciously choosing the beliefs that create ‘good’ feelings and dealing with the ‘bad’ ones. 

How we support ourselves in doing that is a very individual thing. Technically we don’t have to ‘do’ anything. 

Our belief system is nothing more than choice, and we don’t need anything outside of us to help us choose. 

We don’t really need anything outside of us to help us feel our feelings. Again, it kind of boils down to choice–we choose to suppress them or deal with them. We don’t need anything to facilitate crying or any other sort of emotional release.

But most of us probably do need to ‘do’ various things that support our emotional health, that put us in a frame of mind that makes it easier to choose in favor of the beliefs that serve us, that make it easier to maintain a perspective on a situation we don’t like, that will serve us. We may need help managing the various stresses of life.

It’s just important to see these various activities for what they are, to understand the role they play. They are meant as a source of support for our inner transformation, not the source of the inner transformation. 

If something makes you feel good, whether it be affirmations, meditating, exercise, journaling or whatever else, then make use of it. If you find a program or workbook that contains exercises and helpful action steps, awesome. Dive in. 

Our mind is powerful, and our focus, and intention, is powerful; so when we try to evoke positive energy around a  relationship, money or whatever else, it can have value for sure. But we often dilute the power of the various tools and techniques we use for such purposes by not cleaning up the ‘icky’ energy that has tended to dominate around these subjects. We aren’t actually feeling any better, and again, that is the purpose of doing all that stuff. 

When I realized I didn’t have to do all that, I was really relieved because I didn’t like doing it. It didn’t take very long before it all felt very forced and tedious. 

This isn’t to say I never engage in any of these sorts of tools any longer. Sometimes I feel inspired to do something specific and I go with it, but it tends to be for short periods or sometimes even just a one-off. 

The more I shifted from ‘being’ to ‘doing’ in this work, the more easily and quickly things showed up, which was a pleasant surprise. 

The more I focused on my well-being for the sake of it, and not just doing everything in the context of ‘manifesting’ and trying to change the outside in some way, the more amazingly the outside changed without much input from me. 

The more I focused on just living my life, and doing what I could to enjoy the moment ,and what was already there, the more easily everything flowed. 

Something Important to Remember

Switching gears like this–focusing on well-being rather than the ‘stuff’– doesn’t mean abandoning these ‘wants’. 

Again, so long as you are breathing and living in this body, you will be ‘manifesting.’ Stuff can’t help but happen, things can’t help but show up. But we start feeling differently about all these ego wants and pursuits. 

Some we may abandon completely because we realize it isn’t what we actually want. But as for the things we continue to want, and care about, to some degree–they will come, no reason not to.

But how we feel about these things, the value we place on them, the role we see them playing in our life, how we pursue goals–that all changes in a way that will be very beneficial for us. Not only will these things show up more easily, we will enjoy them much more when they do. 

So don’t be afraid to shift that focus, don’t be afraid to prioritize your well-being and detach from worldly pursuits. Feeling better will have no downside to your ‘manifesting’, trust me. Feeling attached to something, and like you need it to be happy, does not make it more likely to come, nor does being detached make it less likely

All you want is to be happy and feel good–the ‘best’ manifestors understand that and make that the priority. 

Would love to hear your comments below…

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4 thoughts on “Law of Attraction: What Makes a ‘Good’ Manifestor?

  1. hi kelli- love your posts and perspectives. i have an attachment to something and know why- i know what the ‘icky feeling’ is- but i don’t know what to do about it. i don’t know how to process it to release it. do you have any suggestions for that?

    1. Hi Camille

      Glad you find the content helpful…always nice to hear. If we explore the root of the feeling–which never comes out of nowhere–we will see the narrative, the story, the mind is layering on top of the circumstance. The attachment comes from thinking the only way to ‘negate’ this narrative is to get the thing, the only way to make the bad feeling go away is to get the thing. But as you explore the story, you see the feelings actually aren’t linked to the circumstance and you naturally feel less attached. The key to accepting this on a feeling level–where it becomes ‘true’ for us–is allowing the feelings up and there isn’t a particular strategy or set of steps to allow this. It is not an action-oriented process that you must master or you can be good or bad at. You just let the feelings up, you acknowledged them–most of the time it will involve some sort of expression of them like crying. And as you ‘unclog’ that drain, the perspectives that will allow for greater and greater detachment become more genuinely your own–they have space to ‘burrow’ more deeply into your being. We often overthink a lot of spiritual ‘work’ because we are so used to our action-based paradigm where we always seem to be ‘doing’ something to get a result.

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