Hi Kelli. I have been noticing a lot of awesome energy building in my life. It feels like I am juuuust on the verge of something. But I’ve been feeling that way for over a year. I always feel like I’m just on the edge of something huge and awesome happening, and then nothing amazing happens. I mean, I feel happier for a while, maybe more content, but nothing changes… basically I don’t get the “stuff” that I think I want. Am I missing something? Do I need to let go of this energy somehow, or pay more attention to signs from the universe? I’m sure I’m probably too attached to my “stuff”.
The ‘Problem’ With Excitement
Notice the quotations used. I don’t want to apply any sort of judgment here. It’s not a true ‘problem’ as in you are doing something wrong. But in most cases, our excitement isn’t pure excitement as in ‘I know the Universe has my back and I am supposed to manifest totally awesome things by nature.’
Our excitement is usually a bit ‘tainted’ with a variety of energies, like desperation, hope something unwanted will be transforming soon, attachment to specific channels through which our manifestation may come,etc…
We are doing all our manifesting ‘work’ and waiting for some sort of payoff, some sort of ‘proof’ it is working and that we do in fact create our own reality.
If we truly bought into a teaching like the law of attraction 1000 percent, if we fully bought into our true nature and our capabilities, there wouldn’t be too much to get ‘excited’ about. Anything we were looking to manifest would feel totally natural, and like the next step.
None of it would feel like a big deal. We wouldn’t be eagerly anticipating anything because we know it is coming without a doubt.
But the reality is we don’t buy in totally–we all have minds after all, we all have conditioning that runs very contrary to this sort of teaching; certain things do seem like a big deal because energetically, we may have a ways to go to get in alignment with them, and our past and current experience do not exactly provide much ‘evidence’ these things are possible.
We will get excited about things. While a life of total emotional neutrality would certainly cut down on all the suffering we experience due to the never-ending cycle of craving and aversion, most of us would find that sort of existence kind of boring and unsatisfying.
Most of us probably wouldn’t have the time or inclination to expend the sort of effort required to achieve a perfectly balanced mind. The idea of not wanting anything is pretty uncomfortable, and I imagine most of us aren’t looking to totally withdraw from a worldly life.
‘Amazing’ Might Not Fall Right Into Our Laps
In most cases, the things we want manifest in a progression. Now, don’t get me wrong–totally awesome things can happen at any moment. A perfect vibration and total trust every waking moment is not a requirement for the really big, mind-blowing stuff to happen.
But in many cases, there may be some stuff that transpires between the present moment, where our energy might be a bit screwy and needs some tweaks, and ‘amazing.’ We experience ‘stepping stone’ manifestations that show us our energy is aligning. They may not be super-sexy or exciting manifestations.
Our mind really doesn’t anticipate this though, and we do all our ‘work’ feeling good trying to manifest stuff we want, and when these big, super-exciting manifestations don’t make themselves known sooner than later, it gets harder to maintain our energetic ‘hard-ons’ if you will. The ‘stepping stones’ depending on exactly what they are, may give a boost here and there but it tends to be short-lived.
We are very accustomed to living outside in, and that is a habit that dies hard. When your mind isn’t being given ‘reasons’ to feel happy, it won’t be. We are not really working on being happier for the sake of being happier (which is all we want anyway) but as a means to an end. We are doing it to get something.
And this is okay; it just is what it is. We don’t like certain things in our life now, and we have a preference for different experiences and circumstances. It’s okay we want something different and it’s okay our motives for getting happier aren’t so ‘pure.’
Another reason the ‘amazing’ manifestations may not be showing up is most of us are usually manifesting from a space of trying to minimize pain and discomfort; we are in ‘fix it’ mode. And there really isn’t anything wrong with that but it will be a very different journey.
We are really struggling with money and want to improve our finances; we are lonely and want a relationship. We don’t like our job and we want a new one. Our life is just generally crappy and we are hoping for some better stuff to show up.
We are really resisting our current reality and we want something to show up to take away those bad feelings.
And again, nothing wrong with this. But manifesting from this space might not lend itself to the ‘amazing’ manifestations.
What tends materialize is really different than what does from the space of true openness to what shows up, being happy just for the sake of being happy, feeling whole and complete now, being detached, not insisting your mind knows best what you want, surrendering the need to control, and all that jazz.
Intellectually you understand it’s all the same to the Universe, and you can manifest the ‘big’ things as easily as the ‘little’ things. You set intentions to let the most awesome things in, but what is happening energetically, and what you are really focusing on, is usually very different.
You want to allow in large amounts of money, but what your mind is really wanting to attract is just enough to cover your bills. You want to manifest your soulmate, but what your mind really wants is just someone to fill the void, to ease the pain of your loneliness, and its standards are none too high.
You want to manifest your dream job, but what your mind is really focusing in on is any opportunity that will allow you to quit your current job that you hate.
We tend to still be really focused on our current reality and all that we are unhappy with now.
Our energy isn’t expansive enough for ‘amazing.’
Stop Waiting for a ‘Reason’ To Feel Better
Again, we are very used to our feelings being determined by what is happening outside us. Our emotions go up and down, all around, all over the place, as we are constantly reacting to our external environment. Like MJ said, she is feeling really good but then nothing happens so then the warm fuzzies don’t remain.
And as a fellow human who has always done this, and still continues to do this, I totally get it. Our mind is very adept at judging our reality, and our experiences, and labeling things as ‘good’ and ‘bad.’
We have preferences, and it’s okay to want different things, and to not want other things to happen. I had periods where I really struggled financially and I didn’t like it. I much prefer the reality where I have a much improved relationship with money. I struggled with a really scary health issue once, and certainly prefer a clean bill of health.
Our natural state is supposed to be one of health, happiness and prosperity, and to want to achieve that is totally understandable; that is something we should be ‘working’ on.
But that doesn’t change the fact we don’t have to let outside circumstances determine how we feel, that we can’t wait for something to happen first before we let ourselves be happier, feel better.
You don’t have to get manically joyful in the midst of turmoil or some great challenge in your life, but you can choose to not focus on those things so much, or use them as an excuse to be miserable. You can choose to look beyond those things, and zero in on the reality you prefer, acknowledge the truth and reject the illusion.
You get to have your reactions, and feel your feelings without a doubt, but you don’t have to remain stuck in them for prolonged periods. You get to have your moments of feeling frustrated things aren’t changing in the ways you would like them to, but then you can shake it off.
You get to have your moments of feeling really attached to certain things happening and buying into your mind’s insistence you can’t possibly be happy without them; but then you can move back to the truth of knowing the absence of this thing isn’t the problem but the meaning assigned to it,–you’re not good enough,etc…– and the true solution to your problem is healing whatever that ‘stuff’ is.
The misconceptions about a teaching like the law of attraction can be very detrimental to our well-being and hinder our natural manifesting capabilities. We get the impression we can control everything around us.
We are led to believe if we just ‘want’ something enough, if we do enough ‘work’ on our energy, if we affirm enough or visualize enough, we can get our ‘stuff.’ Our mind attaches to very specific manifestations believing it has some sort of power to make those very things happen, and when they don’t seem to be happening, it doesn’t feel very good.
Like I mentioned before, your mind views positive emotion as something is must cultivate in order to make something happen. It is a tool, a means to an end, when it should be the goal in and of itself. It’s like we don’t actually care about being truly happier, we just care about getting what we want, and that is just something we ‘must’ do to get it.
We get the impression we must be relentlessly positive and can’t entertain nary a negative thought or feeling lest we won’t get our ‘stuff.’ But we feel really badly about not having said ‘stuff’ and instead of diving into that, and working on transforming it in a meaningful way, we just ‘try’ even harder to manifest what we want because we view it as the solution to feeling better, to making all that stuff go away.
And this creates even more attachment to the ‘thing’ and more strongly solidifies your mind’s faulty argument that you need this thing to be happy, that you can’t feel better without it.
You get to want whatever you want; there is no reason not to have it. Being happier now without it, won’t cancel the ‘order.’ The Universe is responding to your energy, it is not responding to what you ‘want.’ It is not responding to your desperate pleas or constant asking or focus.
If that was the case, we would all get what we want automatically without having to do any sort of shifting in the energy department; we could be as miserable as we want all the live long day and we would still get whatever we wanted simply because we asked for it and were thinking about it all the time.
And I imagine most of you have figured out that it really doesn’t happen that way.
No matter what is happening now, I am sure there is the ability to make even a small shift in your overall state of mind and feeling state. Again, don’t have to reach for total bliss, but even just a little better is certainly possible.
Instead of seeing all that is ‘wrong’ or ‘missing’ in your life, focus on what’s there now that’s good. I am sure there is at least something. Appreciation is a powerful energy, and the more you cultivate, the more you will attract of which to feel appreciative.
Maybe you don’t like your job, but you have a great relationship. Maybe you are a bit lonely, but you have a great job. Maybe you’re not loving your job but it pays really well, and it’s nice to be financially comfortable.
Maybe you are lonely and want a relationship, but you have great friends and lots of hobbies you really enjoy. You see where I’m going with this.
And again, as a fellow human, I know what your mind is probably doing. It is thinking this is stupid. One aspect of your life has nothing to do with the other, so who cares about that good stuff?
Like so many other core foundations of having a happier life, being appreciative of what you already have is so cliche it has lost all meaning, and is dismissed with an eyeroll. We have ‘heard it all before’ and are waiting for some sort of ‘new’ information to aid our growth and help us get out ‘stuff.’
The thing that’s missing makes you feel badly, and that is where all your attention needs to be. You get to be unhappy; you SHOULD be unhappy, and can’t be anything else until something changes.
And as someone with free will who can choose how you feel ,and how you get to view life, you can totally take this tack. Your mind’s arguments for moving about life in this way is highly persuasive and it makes some great points. You can choose to agree for sure.
But realize in doing this, you are making a conscious choice–this unhappiness is not being foisted upon you without your consent.
You’re Always On the Verge
We are here to create. We are all creating in every moment, in our individual lives, and on a grander scale of humanity as a whole. You are always on the verge of something awesome–you can’t help but be if your energy game is ‘tight.’
But we have to exercise a bit of patience as we may not always be in alignment with the things we would like to see in our lives. We have to learn to be in the moment, in the now, not always looking to the future, eagerly anticipating some sort of change.
We have to be open to how the ‘awesome’ shows up; we have to be open to the fact the specific things and PEOPLE our mind wants may not be the best representation of what we truly desire, which is a certain type of feeling.
We have to stop thinking because the exact things our mind wants are not manifesting, that something must have gone wrong; we have to start recognizing the true nature of our control–our energy, not the ability to make anything outside of us happen in any specific way.
We have to let go of the need to control everything; we have to let go of the attachment, expectations and judgment, and surrender to the process.
We get to want whatever we want, and again, no reason not to have it, but must realize the ‘wanting’ is really not part of the equation.
We must choose not to put our happiness on hold until some point in the future when things are ‘better.’ There is no future, only a series of present moments, and NOW is the only time you have to cultivate a different energy. The energy of ‘now’ will impact the energy of the ‘nows’ to come. The present moment and how you feel in that moment is the true point of power.
That doesn’t mean feeling pressure to feel ‘good’ every moment. That isn’t necessary. There is a big difference between feeling your feelings, and acknowledging your resistance, in the context of healing and transformation, and just feeling badly, and feeling sorry for yourself, all the while maintaining a very sour outlook on life.
Whatever energy you are cultivating has to come back to you in some way, in the form of your manifestations; it can’t work any other way. We just need to work on cultivating that energy more from a space of it being its own reward, not as a means to an end.
We have to be open to how that energy manifests, and accept it might not be on our preferred time table, or through the particular opportunity, experience or PERSON on which our mind has set its sights.
You always get to have what you want, but you must realize what you truly want is to feel a certain way, and that is a choice available to you at any time. And again, your reality will have no choice but to mirror back that energy to you, and your experience will be full of stuff that makes you happy.
What did you think of the post? Anything resonate in particular? Looking forward to your comments as always.