That damn law of attraction. We hear people tell us how easy it is. Ask and it is given–that’s all there is to it. But, when you start working consciously with the process, you may falter a bit. You get it in theory, but when you try to work with it in your own life, you feel like you are hitting a wall. Something that is supposed to be so simple feels anything but.
Like I have said in previous LOA posts, it really is quite simple. But, getting to the point where it feels easy, and really buying into it on the deepest levels can take a bit. You have been operating under some extremely powerful limiting beliefs; you are just discovering the true nature of reality and the power we have in shaping our lives.
So, you want to be patient. You want to cut yourself some slack here, and show a bit of compassion for yourself as you navigate a way of thinking and being that probably feels quite foreign to you. Our good old brains put up quite the fight–they mean well, but really slow things down.
Getting from where you are now vibrationally to where you want to be requires understanding certain things about LOA that are not really discussed in depth. Some of the teachings can be a bit vague. Just telling you to feel good or visualize what you want won’t be enough for most people. They need a bit more to sink their teeth into, and that is what I aim to do on my blog. I try to flesh out the process and provide insights and tips that will help people in cultivating those better feelings and beliefs. So, for your reading pleasure, my thoughts on three common issues that can really gum up the channels of receiving.
Not Enough Time Spent Feeling Good Just for the Sake of It
Once we stumble across information about law of attraction, it becomes glaringly obvious how we feel is the crux of the whole process. We attract situations that match the predominant feelings we currently have in our vibration. Sometimes this is exactly what we pictured and sometimes it is something completely different, and often times, even better than what we imagined…but I digress.
When doing this work, it is common to get caught up in always trying to feel good in relation to what we want. We always have our eye on manifesting one thing or another. And, yes, this is a good thing to do. We want to cultivate good vibes around our desires. We want to take inspired actions that make us feel good and that we are moving towards what we want. We want to engage in activities that help cultivate the feelings that lie behind what we intend to manifest.
But, with all this focus all the time in feeling and acting in certain ways, with the specific aim of getting a particular something, we can end up creating a lot of resistance around our desire. We become overly preoccupied with the whole process, and this is usually not in a good way. It is in a way that makes us feel pressure to act(which is just interference when it doesn’t feel good and light), leads us to start wondering ‘how’, activates worry and doubt and causes us to focus on the fact it isn’t here yet.
One of the best ways to counteract this problem is to just make it a point to focus on feeling good just for the sake of it. Don’t always be thinking about acting and feeling in terms of how it relates to getting what you want. So long as we are genuinely feeling good, regardless of the activity or motivation, our vibration will continue to clean itself up, and it will make a positive impact on all areas of our life.
So, if you are not feeling great about a particular manifestation, or are feeling pressure about working consciously with LOA, just step back and work on feeling good for the sake of it. Try to get into a happier space for no other reason than to simply feel better. You will be amazed at the changes you see from such a simple shift in focus.
Differentiating Between Denial and Actually Feeling Good about Your Current Situation
Our point of power in successfully working with the attraction process is now—this means we need to start feeling good now. We have to cultivate the feelings that lie behind our desires right now, regardless of what is going on. Thinking we won’t feel better until we get what we want, or deciding that certain external factors must be changed in order to adopt a more optimistic perspective, is just not an option, at least not if you want to get what you want with minimal pain and suffering, and maximum ease and enjoyment.
So, this means we need to feel good now. But, people can misunderstand this to mean trying to put a happy, shiny spin on things that are just pure crap. And, this is not what is to be done—trying to force yourself to feel better about a situation you just really don’t like or is causing you a lot of pain won’t work. Trying to cultivate warm and fuzzy feelings for someone you can’t stand probably won’t go over too well.
Expressing gratitude for all the good you have, and gaining some perspective by considering others who are going through much more challenging times is certainly helpful, but you don’t want to adopt an attitude of feeling okay with what you have because it ‘could be worse’ or you ‘don’t mind it.’ You don’t have to pretend to like things you don’t like—just work on drawing your attention away from them as much as possible.
Think about the aspects of your life that allow you to get into the feelings that lie behind whatever it is you want. Even if it is just a small thing, if it can get you into that feeling even just a few moments at a time, it is worthy of your attention. Think about changes you can make that would genuinely cultivate those feelings. If you are after a greater sense of ease in life, are there any commitments you can cut back on? If you are looking for a sense of fulfillment, perhaps you can start volunteering a few hours a week.
The key is to get in a space where you genuinely feel good, and begin to shore up that energy. As your focus expands, the good feelings will expand. Energy will start moving, and changes will start taking place.
Don’t force yourself to feel good about things you just don’t feel good about. Look for the little nuggets of good in your job and other aspects of life. Don’t deny your feelings—acknowledge them. Pushing them down and pretending they aren’t there will slow manifestations because these negative feelings and beliefs are still heavy in your vibration. Remember LOA is all about how we feel, not what we are thinking, saying or doing.
Worrying about Other People Messing Up Your Manifestations
Everything we experience is a mirror of what is percolating inside of us—the Universe is just picking up what we are throwing down, and reflecting it back to us. And this includes our interactions with people around us. It is very easy, and understandable, to blame other people for how we feel or certain problems we are experiencing. We think about situations we don’t like, and we conclude that for them to improve, things outside of us, namely other people, need to change. They must start doing things differently if we are to get what we want. We feel compelled to take actions to curry favor or get other people to do specific things or behave a particular way.
But, this is not how it works my friends, not by a long shot. Again, how we experience other people is always a manifestation of our energy. The only thoughts, feelings and actions relevant in a given situation are ours, not the other person’s. Other people can’t create in our reality; what other people do can only affect what we manifest in so far as we allow their energy, thoughts, beliefs, behavior, actions and feelings invade ours.
And just like other people can’t create in our reality, we can’t create in anyone else’s. So, don’t expend your energy trying to make other people act in a way that is more conducive to what you want to manifest. For example, if you and your partner are both trying to work consciously with LOA and you feel he isn’t doing it ‘right,’ don’t worry…he can’t mess things up for you. Don’t spend time criticizing—offer your guidance when you think it will be well-received, and do it in a positive manner. This is a pretty common worry amongst people in relationships, where your life is heavily intertwined with someone else’s.
If he is still grappling with limiting beliefs, fears and feelings, and expresses them, you can’t blame him when you start feeling badly. He didn’t cause anything, he simply activated the same ones in you that were already there. He is just mirroring back to you something already inside you.
So, when other people do and say things that throw us off vibrationally, we can’t blame them. We have to take complete ownership of our thoughts and feelings.
Don’t ever worry that other people will stand in the way of getting what you want—they can’t , it isn’t possible. Everything happens from the inside out, and changing the inside is the only thing that needs to happen to start changing the outside. Anytime we look towards the outside to create the changes we want, we give away our power. We are putting our focus on the wrong thing, and this will really slow our manifestations, or block them completely. You are the only thing that matters in creating your more desired reality..truly.
I hope you enjoyed the post and got a bit clearer on how to truly raise your vibration and feel good about getting what you want. Please let me know your thoughts in the comments. Did anything in particular stand out to you? What part resonated with you the most? Are you facing challenges in any of these areas? How is your manifesting going? Looking forward to hearing your thoughts and having a chat.
Hi Kelli
Another great post from you Kelli and Yes I needed to hear it – all of it!
It is not that I am stuck because I know my abundance is on the way to me I am happy within but some times other people just pish me off big time with their negativity. This does not concern me personally at all and I shouldn’t engage but I some times do and to my detriment as I feel crap afterwards. Gee I am such a sensitive wee man LOL
Now with the LOA I don’t know how it works but I know that it does but I was just wondering if I am responsible for it not manifesting when I want? I realise that everything takes time but if everything is in place that I can conceive what could be the hold up with me.
I am happy, I am positive, I have belief, I am already living the life of my dreams within my self so they are already created and are there, but my body is still here instead of travelling and my bank account does not look good in any sense of the word so would there be anything you can think of that could be holding this train up at the next station??
I was just wondering about your thoughts on this for me!
Your little Irish Buddha
Dominic
PS
I sent you the wrong link for my YouTube Video in my last correspondence to you so here is the correct link http://youtu.be/gfMyZHb76Os
Hey Dominic
So glad you liked the post! Don’t be too hard on yourself about letting other people get to you…I imagine there are few people in this world who have totally put up an impenetrable shield, and never are bothered by others! The best we can do is reflect a bit on what triggered it, and just accept it, then let it pass as quickly as possible.
One of the things with manifestation is like you said, things can take time to take shape, and I believe things come together when they should in the best way possible. How long that can take is not something we can know for sure, but it can feel frustrating when we think that everything is lined up. But, if there are strong feelings of resistance coming up around these things, it is good to take a look at it because it is possible there is still something in us that is interfering. I see you mentioned money specifically and that can be a real bugger as far as attraction goes–lots of weird energy around it, and we can have a hard time not focusing on the fact we don’t have it yet. One of the best things you can do is work on cultivating feelings of abundance and this does not necessarily have to focus on money in any way–you don’t have to pretend like you have a lot of money if you don’t. But, think of other things in your life that make you feel ‘wealthy’ like having good food to eat or whatever else makes you feel that sense of having plenty, no matter how small. It is also a good strategy to focus on all that you have manifested so far–this always gives our energy a nice boost and reminds us we have successfully applied LOA up until this point and will no doubt do it again.
Thanks Kelli
Kelli,
I love your point about not spending enough time feeling good just for the sake of it. It goes along with a note I just jotted down the other night for a post idea I had on the importance of ‘meaningless fun.’
We’re often unintentionally calculating – trying to piece everything together to get us closer to the result that we want. In my case, I find myself doing ‘fun’ activities because I think they might give me something interesting to write about….instead of doing things simply because they make me happy.
Ultimately, doing things that make me happy just for the sake of feeling good will make my writing more creative, passionate, and authentic, so I really just need to get out of my own way sometimes!
Over-thinking the process definitely doesn’t do me any favors. Haha
Thanks for the reminder – have a great week! 🙂
Hey Mandie
I’m so glad you liked the post and you found that little tidbit helpful. It is something I need to remind myself of at times too! I love that phrase-unintentionally calculating–I think that is a great way to describe what we tend to do a lot of the time. You are so right about doing things that just feel good helping your blogging. Some of my best ideas come when I am just hanging out, being relaxed and just enjoying the moment. And, actually, given the importance of feeling good in attracting good things, that ‘meaningless fun’ is actually quite meaningful when you think about it! I look forward to reading that post, I’m sure it will be great!
Thanks Kelli, it’s interesting what you mention about other people whose lives are intertwined with ours and their effect on our reality. What if your significant other is completely unaware of LOA and they have a poverty vibration and I develop a wealthy vibration, how does that work? How can I become wealthy while they stay poor (since we share everything)? Or do I drag his vibration up? Or do we have to split up?
Hi there
It can be challenging when our partners don’t share our same ‘enthusiasm’ for law of attraction. Our own belief system can be a bit fragile at times because of all our own ‘stuff’ and other people’s limiting beliefs just triggers all that, and it is typical for us to get all mad at them for messing with our vibe. But like I said in the post, they cannot impact our creation, as much as it would seem so ‘logically’ based on the fact that we are sharing a life together.
It is totally possible for two people to have a relationship while having totally different vibrations and beliefs. What happens often times is that the person who works on raising their vibration manages to tap into more ‘positive’ versions of their partner on a more consistent basis. Once that person starts seeing results, the other person can sometimes perk up a bit as well. But, then sometimes, the other person raises so high the lower person will gravitate out. That is not something that MUST happen, however. Ultimately, there are no easy answers to that question, and it will depend on your personal circumstances and the emotional feedback you are getting. No one knows the situation better than you. At some point, however, the situation will become clearer and you will know what needs to happen.
As for helping your partner with his own vibration, he can only improve if he wants to–as tempting as it is for those who practice LOA to help others ‘see the light’ all our wisdom will fall on deaf ears if the person is not ready to receive it. The best we can do is continue to live our life, keep manifesting awesomeness and as people take notice, they might become more amenable to exploring it.
Kelli,
How did you learn all these deep facets of the LOA? You must have read tons of books about it… or maybe there’s something in your nature that just GETS it. Thanks for sharing these tips with us.
I feel like all of these are things I know to some extent, but I still struggle with applying them as much as I’d like to.
I hope you had a FABULOUS birthday! Is there cake where you are?
Brittany
Hey Brittany
It was a combination of reading about it and just seeing what transpired with my own experience. It definitely unfolded over time though. I am sure you do know all of it..when we read about these different things, I think there is a level of us that knows this to be true, but we have a lot of conditioning to work through that tells us the exact opposite of all this, and that can be tough. I did have a great birthday and yes, lots of cake. The people we are renting our house from actually got me a birthday cake, which was so sweet of them!
You seem to be pretty happy with life so you are definitely doing better with LOA than you probably give yourself credit for!
Hi Kelli,
Once again a wonderful post from you which really made me realize a lot of things.. Thank you so much.. This post came just at the right time for me.. I really loved the part about feeling good just for the sake of feeling good.. But I have a query here.. Lets say my finance and health areas are not good and I am trying to raise my vibrations in these areas and also trying to make peace with my limiting beliefs in these areas.. But there is no improvement at all.. Now, if I stop thinking or working about these situations consciously.. If I just believe that one day or the other I am going to live the life of my dreams.. If I start feeling good just for the sake of feeling good and having fun and I don’t visualize or if I don’t work consciously on any of my desires, what will be the outcome in this situation? Would I still manifest my desires even if I don’t raise my vibration on that particular area? Would I still manifest my desires even if I don’t eliminate my limiting beliefs in that area? Just feeling good for the sake of feeling good is enough to manifest my dreams? Or do I have to spend some time in consciously working on my desires along with feeling good just for the sake of it? Your insights are always great and I am eagerly anticipating the same this time too..
Thanks.
Hey Melisa
Thanks so much for your comment and I am glad you found the post helpful. Technically we never have to actively think about anything we want to get it..once we have set intentions for something, it has been ‘activated.’ Now, for most of us, we are going to think about the things we want because well..we want them! And, like you said, if we have some limiting beliefs around it, they do need to be worked through. So, there will be some focus on it. Then we will have the times where we visualize either to get into a good feeling space or to help us identify our limiting beliefs–visualization is a great tool for doing that. Then sometimes things will happen that show us we are on track and we will feel really good and think about what we want in a really positive way. So, for most of us, the manifesting process will involve a lot of focus on what we want in some form or another.
As far as the feeling good just for the sake of it, I recommended this as a tool because when we are just trying to feel good just to feel good, our vibration naturally raises, and since that is what determines what we attract, it gets energy moving in a really good way. When our energy raises, our whole outside experience will begin to change, regardless of whether we are actively focusing on it. It is kind of like if I squeeze a drop of dye into a cup of water and mix it in–all of the water will change, not just some parts.
Now, the only exception to this would be if there were really large amounts of active resistance around a particular issue–then, that would need to be worked on because there are clear blocks there that aren’t just going to go away. Also, just feeling good for the sake of it is great for helping limiting beliefs just kind of wither away on their own because you will notice more good things happening for you, and that will strengthen your faith in LOA overall. And when this faith gets stronger, we are better able to overcome limiting beliefs of any kind because we know more and more how invalid they are, regardless of what they are specifically and what area of life they are in.
So, yes, there will likely be times of consciously focusing on what you want, and actively addressing limiting beliefs, but know that always thinking about what you want is not necessary. Unless you feel really good every time you think about what you want it is good to step back sometimes because chances are, there are a lot of feelings of lack and noticing its absence being activated. The Universe won’t forget what you want..I think we have a fear this will happen, so we feel compelled to always think about it.
Wow! I feel great after reading your response.. Love the way you always explain complex things and make it look simple and easy to understand even for a beginner.. Especially the analogy about drop of dye in a cup of water.. Genius! It just resonated with my heart and felt all warm and fuzzy.. Its just like I forgot something which my heart already knows and have forgotten for a while and I feel like after reading your words its remembering everything! I have already started practicing your tips in my life and feeling so relaxed and happy 🙂 But one thing is bugging me.. Its about the denial vs actually feeling good about current situation.. For example, I love my job, my co-workers and my boss and I am generally happy with my job. But there are certain other things about my job that irritates me or I am not quite happy with, like the job location or the transport facility. But I know I can attract and have a job which I am completely happy with and don’t have to settle with the current one since I am 90% happy with it and I know I can have 100% satisfaction and happiness with my job. So I intend to manifest my perfect job and trying to feel good about it. So in my current office, everyday I feel like this is my last day here and I am about to start my dream job since I have already manifested it. What I wanted to know here is whether this is denial of my current situation since I am imagining and feeling like this is my last day of work in my current job when it is actually not true? Or since it is somewhat like ‘acting-as-if’, am I moving in the direction to attract my dream job?
Hi Melisa
Thanks so much..I am glad you found my response helpful. You are so right about that..this is a truth we know on a deeper level, but it has been buried under a lot of ‘stuff.’ We just have to work on finding our way back to our natural state of being a powerful creator. I don’t think you are in denial about your situation. You seem to have aspects of your job that you actually do truly like and you seem to be focusing your attention on that, so that is what it is all about. If everything about our life was fine as it was, we wouldn’t feel the urge to have anything different, so it’s okay to feel an active dislike for certain things-that sense of contrast helps us figure out what we want. We just want to try and draw our attention away from those aspects. Just really tune into those moments you like about your job, like the fun times with co-workers or having pleasant interactions with your boss, and you will strengthen those good feelings that will usher in the more desired job.
Hi Kelli,
Thank you so much.. I am pretty much clear now.. This whole process makes more sense.. Thank you so much f or bringing such clarity..
Thanks.
My pleasure Melisa!
Hey Kelli,
I like this post about receiving. This reminds me of when I was teaching salsa dancing. There were quite a few people that use to ask me how to get on beat, or how to catch the rhythm of the music. I use to give them a generic answer and tell them they have to let go and feel the music. Of course they gave me a disappointed look. So just to help them out, I told them to listen to the clave or the bass, pick a beat, and go from there.
As you said, it depends on how you feel. You just do it for the sake of it. The feeling of happiness that you long for will just come if you do it without guidelines, it just is. It’s our natural state. You don’t have to focus on it or any other feeling you want for that matter. It just comes naturally which is weird. I notice this not only with salsa, but running, lift weights, playing piano and conga drums. It’s just amazing how we as humans are built, and the fact that we can attract anything we want by just going inside ourselves shows how special we are!
Thanks for sharing Kelli! Have a great one!
Hi Sherman
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your insights and experiences. That is such a great analogy..I really liked that! You are so right about people getting disappointed by ‘generic’ information but the keys to being happy or succeeding in life are quite simple, but it can be difficult to apply it so those little tips can give them something to focus on. You are so right about it being our natural state, but it is very easy for people to have a hard time buying into that. I know I did for awhile but I’m glad I saw the light! It is truly amazing how we have that capacity–it is just about getting back in touch with it. I really enjoyed your comment!
Hi Kellli, awesome article as always! This one particularly hits home with me as often when I’m feeling down I don’t see the good in my life. I know there are golden nuggets of happiness and things that make me joyful, but I don’t acknowledge them during my dark days. When I do, I feel better. So I’ve gotten into the habit of recognizing and acknowledging the good in my life even when I’m down. It’s remarkable how much quicker I feel better when I do that.
Hi Terezia
Thanks so much. I am so glad you liked it. You are certainly not alone in that..it is very easy to lose sight of the good when we are feeling down. Those negative emotions are quite strong and can really suck us in. We just need to find that balance between allowing ourselves to have these moments and showing compassion and trying to shift perspective. That is good your awareness has expanded around remembering to do that…that is a big step in the right direction, and one we can forget to take.
Just discovered your blog and I love it! I’ve been practicing law of attraction for 2 years now and the reason why I got into yoga and meditation! So glad I have something to read from now on!
Cheers!
Hi Kach
Thanks so much. I am so glad you like it. Hope you love what comes just as much! I am a huge fan of meditation and it can bring benefit to so many aspects of our life.