One of the biggest misconceptions about the law of attraction is you are being encouraged to be in complete denial about your circumstances, and just hope some happy thoughts will fix it all.
Denying won’t get you very far. But, a willingness to shift focus from what may be in front of your face now, and see through to the infinite possibilities that lay beyond is an absolute must.
The only moment we truly ever have is NOW, so no matter what is happening, there has to be some sort of shift energetically in order to unleash some new energy, open up possibilities that were closed off before and truly become a co-creator with the Universe, who is just dying to lend us a hand, but can’t defy our vibration.
As a fellow human, I get how this can seem easier said than done. We have all sorts of conditioning that resists this sort of teaching and way of looking at the world. We are very accustomed to looking at all that is wrong in our life and all the reasons why things can’t get better, all the reasons why we can’t have what we want. As miserable as we may be, we are very comfortable operating from this space because it is familiar.
Sometimes our current reality is really doing a number on us and it can seem next to impossible to extract ourselves from it. Severe financial troubles are affecting every nook and cranny of your existence. The symptoms of a health issue are all-consuming, and it seems like your illness dictates every facet of your existence. You are convinced your ultimate desire is contingent upon several other things manifesting first, and can’t possibly see how any of those things can happen, leaving you dejected and hopeless.
But no matter what is happening, there is always a way, trust me. So I wanted to give you a few core suggestions to set the foundation for getting the ball rolling on energetic transformation in even these most challenging of circumstances.
You Are Being Presented with a Massive Opportunity
This is the type of stuff your mind resists big-time. This idea of these challenging circumstances being some kind of ‘gift’ can really get your blood boiling. I get that because I too have had similar reactions when dealing with some of my own personal shit storms that were particularly uncomfortable.
But if you can get beyond that initial reaction and really ponder this for a moment, it can be life-changing for what you are going through now. The more difficult a circumstance we are in, the bigger the energy behind these manifestations.
There was stuff building for some time and because it wasn’t addressed, the manifestations got ‘bigger.’ You are now at a point where it cannot be ignored anymore–it is just too painful, it is affecting you too deeply. I’ve often referred to this as the Universe kind of ‘forcing your hand.’
And the more energy you are being served up to deal with, the more there is to release. Allowing yourself to really dive into it can bring massive change into your life. It can allow for massive healing of the various energetic ‘wounds’ that are actually the true source of your discontent–not the external problems you are facing. They are just a manifestation of that.
In order to get the most out of this opportunity, you are going to have to really dive into some shit here. You have to come to terms with how you really feel about your life and yourself. You have to be brutally honest about your belief system, the things you fear, the doubts you have, the pain you are feeling.
I won’t lie–this can be uncomfortable as shit. One good cry or anger release probably isn’t going to get the job done. You might feel kind of crappy for awhile but that doesn’t mean feeling crappy every single second.
While you may not be able to manifest a whole new reality overnight, while it can take a bit to get into alignment with your preferred circumstances, it is important to remember that even the smallest shifts in energy can create new possibilities and you can manifest something good at any moment. It doesn’t need to take a long time to see change, but the positive improvement may not look like your mind thinks it has to look.
Consistent Engagement with Your Energy is Crucial
When you are really in the thick of some shitty circumstances, consistent engagement with your energy is crucial. This doesn’t mean spending hours a day on your personal growth and vibration management. This doesn’t mean falling into the trap of making manifesting all about the tools and techniques. This doesn’t mean constantly analyzing every thought and feeling.
But if you really want to build some momentum behind the energies that will serve you, there has to be some effort there. It is kind of like exercise–you can’t build up muscle or better stamina unless you regularly engage in physical activity.
The trick is finding things that resonate with you personally and doing your best to keep it simple. Don’t create some elaborate routine that you will have trouble sticking with.
The more you ‘do’ the more you are going to make manifesting all about ‘action’ and you will start feeling tremendous pressure to make sure you are doing it ‘right.’ If things don’t change as fast as your mind wants them to, you will start getting all pissed off that things are not happening even though you are ‘doing’ all this stuff.
The whole idea of enough ‘effort’ eventually producing some sort of result doesn’t apply to creating change on an energetic level. Your mind really doesn’t understand that though.
Sometimes you are not going to be feeling it and you’ll skip out–that’s cool. But only you can truly know when it is good to take a pass altogether or when you may not be feeling so great but ultimately know doing something will help shift energy and focus.
Anything that Makes You Feel Better Is a Good Use of Your Time
When we embrace a teaching such as the law of attraction and give this whole conscious creation thing a whirl, we may worry if we aren’t constantly focusing on what we want and engaging in some sort of specific tool or technique to bring it about, nothing is going to change.
Again, we make manifesting all about ‘doing’ forgetting it is actually about what we are ‘being.’
This whole idea of just trying to feel ‘good’ or at least ‘better’ sounds nice in theory and we intellectually understand it based on what we now know about energy and how our reality is truly created.
But as for really applying this in our lives, it is not so easy. We may feel like we are being ‘lazy.’ There is that part of us that believes this really isn’t how it works–after all, isn’t suffering, sacrifice and hard work what really creates change, what really makes us deserving of the good stuff?
We have really big problems on our hands–aren’t we supposed to wrack our brains trying to figure out a solution?
But again, the energy-oriented approach towards change is very, very different than the action-oriented approach. This doesn’t mean you’ll never take any action or make a variety of decisions. That is likely going to be part of the process.
But true change doesn’t come on the level of action, it comes on the level of energy. So anything that shifts our energy into a better place is going to be very helpful in this journey.
Anything you can do to feel better is going to serve you well, and I truly mean anything. When we are feeling good, or at least better, our vibration is in a different place and since it is our vibration that dictates our reality, a ‘higher’ vibration will lend itself to better things happening.
You’ll be creating some space for these things to show up, whether it is the end manifestation, or some sort of idea, inspiration, solution, encounter or opportunity that will help get you there.
So let yourself do anything that makes you feel better–whether it is somehow related to the manifestation is completely irrelevant. It might be watching a funny movie, taking your dog for a long walk, finally making time for that yoga class, spending time in nature….again, it really truly doesn’t matter and there are no right or wrong activities, or one that is better than another.
And on a related note, give some thought to things you are doing now that might not be feeling so great, things that seem like a relief to give up or at least take a break from.
Maybe you are feeling really frustrated with your blogging efforts and it feels great to think of taking a couple of weeks off–do it. Maybe you want to block off a couple of weeks from your coaching or consultation business to just focus on you.
Maybe there is a commitment you need to extract yourself from because you never really wanted to do it in the first place. Maybe you are long overdue for establishing some boundaries with certain people in your life.
If you are in a really painful situation now, it is highly likely that subtracting certain things from your experience now is required in addition to any enhancements.
So that’s my thoughts on that. If you can consider these core ideas you are well on your way to making some meaningful energetic shifts and uncovering loads of insights that will help you along the path.
Your Turn…
What did you think of the post? Anything resonate in particular? Do you have any suggestions for dealing with these challenging circumstances and successfully looking beyond them to what is possible? Looking forward to your comments as always.
If you are interested in taking your manifesting to the next level, be sure to check out my new teleclass series starting September 4th:
Beyond Tools, Techniques and Positive Thinking: Uncovering the True Roots of Manifesting Success
great article thanks:) I’m one of those “toilers” who equate hard slog with getting ahead so am consciously switching to easier modes of living, and this article is a timely reminder….so thankyou. My bit of joy is getting a massage:)
Hi Mary
Thanks for your comment. Glad it had some timely insights for you. That shift is definitely a process for everyone…certainly some deep conditioning there. That you are conscious of it is more than ‘half the battle’ so you’re doing great.
I think you’re a prophet. That’s all.
The ego part of me finds that very flattering but alas I am just someone who may have a knack for explaining things we all know to be true inside on some level. We just need some outside assistance sometimes in connecting with the information.
I said a great big THANK YOU to the universe when I saw this post show up in my news feed today. Oh, how good the universe is and I know the universe 100% has my back. No joke, Kelli, I came to your blog yesterday and used the search feature to look for blog posts on this very topic!!! (Of course, there’s always encouraging stuff even if it’s not exactly what I’m looking for.) Gosh, this was so encouraging and a perfect way to start my day and week. I’ve done a lot of “work” the past 6 weeks, not work in the mentality of trying to “make stuff happen,” but the necessary work to delve into the roots of my limiting beliefs, etc, etc. It’s been truly amazing and the shifts that I’ve experienced have been life-changing. Without these energetic shifts, I think I’d be in a totally different place with some of the practical details of my current circumstances. In fact, I think I can safely say that without these energetic shifts, I’d probably feel totally paralyzed and depressed right now. But you know what…I don’t! I can recall a number of times even from the past few days when I’ve made choices to do things that bring me joy (even with my grumpy kid(s) along for the ride and believe me, that positive vibration helped me stay cool and calm when they weren’t, haha!).
I am changing my life and my reality, co-partnering with the universe. In the past, I would’ve said that wasn’t possible. But now today, right this very moment, not only do I know it’s possible, I know without a shadow of a doubt that it’s happening.
Thank you for the reminders and encouragement to keep focusing on my energy, keep doing the sometimes uncomfortable stuff involved with my past and my limiting beliefs, and to keep focused on things that bring me joy.
Love and light to you today, Kelli and Ryan. 🙂
Hi Sarah
Thanks so much for your comment and sharing your experience. I can feel a great energy coming from just reading the words–it is clear there is a true energetic shift. Like you have seen from your experience, it might not always be so comfortable to look at what is happening but what can take place on the other side of it is truly remarkable. When we see that, facing that stuff or feeling badly as we process doesn’t seem so scary or like something to be avoided at all costs. Much love and light to you as well!
Hi Kelly, first time I’m leaving my comment in your blog
Have always been the “passive reader” ?
Awesome posts as always with your other articles which I mostly relate and resonate with
I believe it’s the universe bringing me your post timely in response to some “temporary unpleasant” situation I have in my life currently
Thanks again!
Hi Peggy
Thanks so much for your comment. I am so glad you enjoyed the post and found something helpful in dealing with a current challenge. When we are open and believe it is so, we will always get what we need when we need it.
hey,
I couldn’t agree more, that nailed it. Trying to explain this can be hard to others at times. It’s a hard pill to swallow, especially if they need to take time away from things they can’t let go of in the 1st place. But that shift will take you closer to where you want to be.
Thank you for another amazing post.
Lots of love to you & ryan
zaira
Hi Zaira
Thanks for your comment and so glad you enjoyed the post. You are right that this way of looking at things might not resonate with everyone. For those that do feel that resonance, hopefully these insights can help them get unstuck from where they are now.
Hey Kelli, wonderful article . I loved the simplicity of your writing. I relate to this very much when I started working on my energy shift. Yes u r very right we just have to roll in the emotional flow which tells us where we r from time to time. There is nothing to ‘do’ but to take care of emotions. I have a baby and because of that I can’t fix timings for my medications or set some specific routine. I have to work around baby’s time. Before it was very frustrating and tiring but since I purposely started to feel good and just do what makes me happy things have gone lot better. I changed my perspective and everything changed for good.
Now I just feel physical tiredness but no negative feelings. Within a month I came out of severe postpartum depression, extreme anger and constant frustration. After purposely shifting my energy towards good feelings from time to time I started feeling so peaceful and happy.
Yes universe does help u if u want to help yourself. Thank you so much for sharing insights. You exactly know where most of us struggle. Thanks for the audio clips. Those r great to listen while enjoying cup of tea. Love 🙂
Rhea
Hi Rhea
Thanks so much for your comment and sharing your personal experience and insights. Like you said, our emotions are merely messengers that help us know what’s going on within and the information they can give is invaluable. Having a new baby is extremely stressful and your story is a great testament to the power of focus and inner shifts, and if we are consistent with it, even the bleakest most challenging situations can transform, along with our perceptions and responses to what happens. Sounds like you are doing great.
As far as I can see you have the most succinct, practical, helpful, no frills, insightfully accurate take I’ve seen anywhere on what is, in essence, needed to consciously create.. Thank you for that., and, as you say: “”When we are open and believe it is so, we will always get what we need when we need it.”” – we just need to get to that state of being.= and I am glad that your website is such a supportive resource to keep reminding us.
Hi Sue
Thanks so much for your comment and I am so glad you enjoy the content–I aim to make it as ‘user-friendly’ as possible.
You say here: “it is our vibration that dictates our reality…” but in other article you said “we can’t control reality, it is not all up to us to make it happen” So what? Is it up to us or not?
I appreciate your positive approach, which saves us from disappointment, but I feel that even YOU have a second guess in your heart when you write about ” infinite possibilities that lay beyond…”
Is universe full of possibilities? For example if someone (like myself) wants more money, are there ENDLESS possibilities for it? Of course not. There are few possible ways like inheriting or lottery or gift or job or new business… So WHAT ELSE, if none of it were my case?
The more genuinely believed in dreams, the worse broken heart, if not manifested . That’s where my “vibration and energy” is now. I feel I have been deceived by movie “the Secret”. I wish I hadn’t used the law of attraction, and enjoyed the few things I had. I was the loser, both physically and emotionally.
Life is too short, shorter than these long periods of time each one of us are supposed to try to be PATIENTLY HAPPY, as you wrote here, you agree ?
Hi Mohammad
I actually don’t see a contradiction there. Our vibration is what influences our reality, but that doesn’t mean we are able to dictate exactly what happens in our external reality exactly as our mind wants it. For example, a particular energy can lead to attracting love into our lives, more money or a new job. But we can’t make a particular person love us, a particular company hire us or force money through a specific channel. I suspect you are focusing more on ‘doing’ things to attract a different reality than ‘being’–common trap with the LOA. Based on this comment and a similar comment left recently on another post, it seems you are looking for some sort of answer to quell your doubts or are looking to be convinced of something you want to believe but maybe just don’t–I can’t provide that for you. This blog is the result of my own experience and insight and if you don’t resonate, you should find material that you do connect with. If this way of looking at the world doesn’t seem to be working for you, it may be time to try another approach.
Even though I got super upset at my job and cried my eyeballs out a week ago, I have been feeling more and more like something amazing is waiting for me, just around the corner. Sometimes I am not sure if this is delusion or actual feelings. But then, I have been noticing little things, the way that the Universe is taking care of me. Like, I’m in the wrong lane and don’t know if I can get over, and a space just so happens to open up. Or an extra long green light when I’m running just a bit late. Or blog posts that are super helpful and right on target with where I am just now. I am not really “trying” any more… I am just focusing on doing things that make me feel happy and fulfilled. And even though my job is stressful (I work with elementary kids) and at times I really don’t want to be there anymore, I still feel mostly good at the end of the day. At least all this stress is helping me to come to know myself better.
Now just ask me how I am feeling with 44 screaming kids around me tomorrow morning… lol.
Hi MJ
Thanks for your comment. That is definitely not a delusion but you just tapping into an intuitive nudge that your clearing is making space for something great to make its way in. All that purging is beneficial and why I always stress to people not to resist it or force themselves to get all happy. It literally creates a space in our energy field for new things to show up. I like what you said about these challenges helping you know yourself better–that is key to really creating the life we want because the more we know ourselves the more we know what works and doesn’t work for us personally. And god bless you for working with all those kids–I could never do it!
Hi Kelli,
Great post as always. I have been manifesting for about 3-4 months now and feeling good, and I’ve been pretty amazed at the signs I’ve been seeing from the universe. I think since I’ve been seeing signs but nothing has been happening, that limiting beliefs are starting to kick in. I’m trying to manifest a relationship, but seeing other people in one and me kind of feeling like a loner is causing me to overthink. It’s something that I really would like, but not something that I NEED. How do you suggest I let go of this want and wait for it to come to me? Not to mention a lot of my family members make me feel worse about being single, so that naturally causes me to worry that I won’t receive
Hi Brig
Thanks for your comment. That is common–we feel good, we see some outer ‘proof’ there may be something to this but our mind hasn’t gotten what it’s wanted yet so it starts freaking out a bit. We have to be shown our limitations or we can’t clear them so your current circumstances are just facilitating that–you no doubt have limiting beliefs because we ALL do so it’s okay. The key to manifesting a relationship is cultivating love for yourself and then you will attract more love to be mirrored back to you. As for your family members, it is important to take ownership of the feelings being triggered by their words–they are just stirring something up in you that is already there. This doesn’t mean they are not being dicks but a big part of manifesting is taking responsibility for our energy so we can better ‘protect’ it against other people. And their issues with your singleness are just reflections of their own blend of crap and have nothing to do with you. If you are interested in diving deeper into relationships specifically, I recommend checking out my Manifesting a Relationship program–that dives deeply into the various energetic issues surrounding this area of our life.
Brig. Every battle in life is a battle in the Mind. You must Master your Mind or your mind will master you.
You must Recondition your mind with the power of your words. The tongue is one of the smallest members of our bodies, but it is the most powerful. The power of Words is the ultimate step to Recondiioning your self limiting beliefs.
Write a list of all the things you do not want to experience in your life anymore, and then the next step is to write the opposite of what you just wrote, and begin each statement with:
“I AM”.
Words are very creative, and they are the the most creative thing on earth, as a matter of fact the world was created through the power of words.
I am a loner.
OPPOSITE: I am in a incredible relationship with the most incredible person!
I am single.
OPPOSITE: I AM happily engaged to the most beautiful person!
I am ugly.
OPPOSITE: I AM so gorgeous!
You must repeat these statements out loud with passion and excitement every single day, you cannot fall off the path that leads to more life. REPETITION will be KEY. Do it for 30 days straight.
Also, attach gratitude to each statement you say by being grateful for it in advance for that which is not there yet in the VISIBLE, but you know it is being created through your words, and they will take form and become VISIBLE things.
“I AM so happy and grateful now that I am in the most incredible relationship!”
Hi Kelly i love your blog and read it frequently. I discovered the law of attraction a few years ago and have read alot about it and have even manifested some things here and there. It is in terms of attracting a partner I see this concept popping up frequently…and its the whole you have to transform into your ideal partner…in order to attract them.
So lets say i want a man who is phsyically fit and does martial arts. Do I now have to become a fitter person and practice martial arts aswell?
I just wanted a bit more insight on this whole “you have to turn into the person you want to attract.” Thing.
I know its not really related to the post but i would really like your input on this concept as it has been confusing me for years.
Thank you so much for all that you have shared with us.
Hi Vanilda
Thanks for your comment and I am so glad you enjoy the blog. The first thing I would say is that you don’t have to transform yourself into anyone different than who you are–sure we all have our ‘stuff’ to work on but we don’t need to become someone else to be more lovable or more of an ideal partner. With that being said though, things we admire in other people can clue us into things that we might want to cultivate in ourselves. The key to attracting a relationship is making peace with being single and learning to love yourself first and foremost and then you will have that love mirrored back to you and multiplied in the form of a partnership. It also requires examining the parts of ourselves that may not want a relationship or feel ‘safer’ being single. As you do this inner work, you will certainly make changes in your life, who you are will change in a variety of ways but don’t look at it as trying to ‘fix’ yourself in any way. If you are interested in attracting a relationship specifically and want to dive deeper into the energetic component of that, I would recommend checking out my Manifesting a Relationship program. That covers a lot of stuff that may clear up your confusion and offer some insights into your current struggles.
As I read your article and contemplated things to “subtract” from my life right now, dating popped up in my mind immediately. I feel like there’s some deep diving and self work I want to do and even contemplating dating seems to be a distraction from that even though manifesting a significant other is at the top of my manifesting list (right under loving, tuning into, and taking care of myself and becoming my own best friend).
But then, there is this part of me that wonders am I just taking the easy road out. Then, I read your comment: “It also requires examining the parts of ourselves that may not want a relationship or feel ‘safer’ being single. ”
Can you guide me to knowing whether the sense of relief I feel when deciding to “shelve dating” is from a place of doing what’s right for me right now or avoiding and choosing the “safer” route of being single. We talked about this some in our session but I’m still waffling back and forth.
Hi Ben
Thanks for your comment. When your intuition is speaking to you like that, it is good to honor it. It obviously seems strange because like you said, it is one of the things you want to manifest most. But when we can remember that doing the inner work and clearing whatever needs to be cleared is the key to achieving true well-being, and manifesting the things we want from an ‘optimal energy’ that we aren’t focused on specific manifestations isn’t the problem it seems to be to our minds. You not focusing specifically on manifesting a relationship won’t stop a relationship from manifesting. A sense of relief is usually an indicator we have been putting a lot of pressure on ourselves to manifest a specific thing and that pressure usually doesn’t bode well for our ‘efforts’ anyway. Sure, there may be a part of you ‘copping out’ but I suspect the primary energy behind this is that you feel it is best to focus more generally on your overall vibe than working on one specific aspect.
Hi Kelli, I just read this now and found it encouraging, especially this part:
“While you may not be able to manifest a whole new reality overnight, while it can take a bit to get into alignment with your preferred circumstances, it is important to remember that even the smallest shifts in energy can create new possibilities and you can manifest something good at any moment. It doesn’t need to take a long time to see change, but the positive improvement may not look like your mind thinks it has to look.”
Sometimes it can be really hard to believe that things are shifting, especially if they don’t appear to be changing on the outside. But like you say, even little bits can help.
I also like what you said about doing things that make you feel good. Right now I’m listening to music because I enjoy that. Thanks for the post. 🙂
Hello there
You are right, it can be challenging because all our mind can see is what is right in front of us. It can’t see what is happening behind the scenes. It can’t see all the different ways things can come together. Listening to music is one of my favorite vibe boosters too.
Hi there its an awesome article.. It is simply a Blueprint of how my thoughts change from feeling what I want to what I see (my current reality) without me knowing about it and then I consciously bring my thoughts back so I am going to practise what you mentioned.. thanks..
Hi Rohit
Thanks so much for your comment and so glad you enjoyed the post. Like you said…it is all about consciously redirecting. As long as we make an effort to get off autopilot and more consciously engage our mind and inner world, we will find it much easier to make these changes and have them stick.