Law of Attraction: I Can’t Stop Thinking about What I Don’t Want to Happen

This habit of the mind with which we are all too familiar never feels good, but once you get a whiff of conscious creation, this tendency causes even greater anxiety.  We are trying our damnedest to be ‘positive’ so we can get what we want; we are trying so hard to think more about what we want rather than what we don’t.

If our inner world creates our outer, if what we focus on expands, we know thinking a lot about what we don’t want is not the best idea. But how to break such a deeply ingrained habit?

The good news is, just like our host of other tendencies that aren’t exactly law-of-attraction-friendly, we don’t have to eradicate it completely. We just have to make it less dominant.

There is no concrete set of steps, that if followed properly, will end with you being able to control your thoughts perfectly.

This is one of those questions that won’t be able to be answered the way our mind wants it answered because there is no thing you can ‘do’ to make yourself stop doing something like this, other than just choosing to make your best effort to focus in a different way.

And yes, that really is a choice available to you. But to get into the space where you make that choice for real, you have to examine what is there now energetically and emotionally. Pain in the ass I know, but this is your best bet.

A lot of people have asked me about this lately so thought it made sense to make it my next post.

Exact Thoughts Don’t Create Reality

When it comes to conscious creation, there is a lot of talk about your thoughts creating reality, thinking ‘positively,’etc…and this wording can give the impression that we will manifest exactly what we think about. Sometimes this is true with both the wanted and unwanted, but often, this isn’t the case. This isn’t something that is absolute.

I am sure there have been many times in your life where you worried about very specific scenarios, maybe quite a bit, and they never materialized.

To me, it seems there is some other ‘force’ that influences what we think about, there is another layer of ‘energy’ underneath, that is more ‘general’ or ‘broad,’ more on the level of feeling. And this energy gets translated into more specific ‘stuff’ in terms of our desires, fears and the like. This energy is what influences the words and pictures in our head. 

That more ‘base’ energy will determine what we attract into our life; we will attract things that feel just like the feelings we feel.

So if you worry about certain things happening, it doesn’t necessarily mean those exact situations will manifest.  

But whatever energy is prompting this resistance, this fear, will likely be mirrored back to you in different ways in your physical reality. And these experiences will FEEL a similar way as the fear or unwanted outcome in question.

So even if these outcomes are not guaranteed to happen simply because you think about them, you still want to do the energetic ‘work,’ to see where the fear and the resistance is stemming from.  

Don’t use this little nugget of manifesting insight to give yourself permission to keep focusing in ways that don’t serve you because you no longer worry there will be any consequences to it.

This is especially important if you are worrying a lot, if you are having a strong emotional reaction to the situation. That means there’s more energy present, and therefore more likely to manifest in some way sooner or later.

Plus, it doesn’t feel very good to think about things that scare us, make us angry,etc…so I imagine you would want to do something about that.

So an important question to ask yourself is…

What’s Really Going On?

Everything always comes down to feelings. We like the things we like because they make us feel good. We want certain things we don’t have now because we think having them will make us feel good.

We don’t like what we don’t like in our life now because these situations and problems make us feel badly. We resist certain possible future outcomes, we have so much fear about not getting what we want, because we believe these scenarios will make us feel badly.

So what are you really worried about? What is making you feel so resistant to this situation? What fears do you have about it?

The fear and resistance to these experiences likely run deeper than obvious surface reasons, like being afraid of getting sick because you don’t want to experience physical pain, or being afraid of not having enough money because you won’t be able to pay your bills on time.

These deeper, more ‘general’ issues are being channeled into more specific situations.

You may fear illness because it represents a loss of freedom to you. Your fear of another driver causing an accident with you may be a deeper fear of things happening outside your control. You may worry losing money means losing someone’s love.

Along a similar vein, it is important to consider what meaning, what sort of story you are telling yourself about this situation. It is usually a shitty one.

Some of these deeper issues, these stories, may make a lot of sense to you, and some of the connections may seem a bit strange. Don’t dismiss any of the latter.

If something is coming into your mind, it’s important, it’s relevant. The part of our mind that harbors all this fear ,and jacked-up thinking, doesn’t make a hell of a lot of sense the overwhelming majority of the time.

Would You Be Down for It All?

Would you be willing to accept this unwanted outcome, this thing manifesting, or any other potentially unwanted scenario? Before you answer with a resounding ‘hell no,’ hear me out.

All of the resistance we have surrounding the things we want–pushing against what is now, worrying about what we don’t want to happen, taking action in hopes we can mold circumstances to our liking,etc….

How is that working out? Does it tend to lead to what we want? No. Does it seem to keep the things we don’t want from happening? No. Does it seem to offer us any sort of benefit? No. Does the constant worry about what might happen feel good? No.

So, wouldn’t it make sense to experiment with dropping the resistance, giving up the fight, making peace with what is and what may be? This will not make this thing more likely to happen, believe me. It is just the opposite because resistance is a very powerful energy, and the more okay and accepting we are of something, the less resistance we feel around it, the less we are focusing on it.

When all that crap energy dies down, it is much easier to focus positively and build momentum; it doesn’t feel like such an effort because you are not trying to do it from a space of fighting against that more negative, fear-fueled energy. There is a more ‘neutral’ energetic base from which you are starting.

Would you even be willing to consider that maybe, just maybe, this unwanted thing happening could be the very experience that helps you get to where you want to be, can actually help you align with what you want even more powerfully?

Do you know what helped me change my money vibration most dramatically for the long-term? Being in a situation where I had none and was literally living off credit cards.

Do you know what situation helped me heal some of my deepest energetic wounds, and become way more physically and emotionally healthier? Experiencing a really scary, painful health issue.

This isn’t to say we must suffer greatly or experience extreme hardship to transform significantly. But the fact of the matter is, us humans tend to respond to certain types of situations in ways that do cause great suffering, and this does present us with a tremendous opportunity to grow and heal in more dramatic fashions.

This isn’t to say we can’t have our negative reactions–we certainly can, and allowing them is an important part of the process. But we get to assign the story, the meaning to our experiences. We can still have these human reactions, but at the same time, see how something that seems bad on the surface, may actually hold some sort of benefit, some sort of opportunity.

When we are down for anything, when we are willing to receive it all, all that energy that gets created from resisting, fighting, needing, controlling isn’t there as strongly. And in my experience, it is the lack of resistance that plugs us into possibility more readily than being super happy and high-energy all the time.

You Have a Choice

As mentioned earlier, the only thing you can really ‘do’ to stop yourself from thinking in this way is choosing to do so. Our mind presents really good arguments as to why we should worry, why we should focus negatively, why we should give our attention to the worst-case scenarios. As someone with a mind too, I  know exactly how those little fuckers operate!

But knowing what we know about conscious creation, and the role of energy in shaping our reality, buying in will pose quite the problem. If we choose to let our mind win out, to give into our fear and negative thinking, we have to take responsibility and own we are doing this of our own volition.

This will be a choice you will have to make over and over, and this is particularly true when it comes to situations that create a stronger emotional charge, where there is a greater amount of resistance and fear to the ‘thing.’

The tendency to think negatively, to fear the future, is nothing more than a deeply ingrained habit. And it is a habit we can break. And by this, I don’t mean totally eliminating fear and negative thinking. You’ll have those moments, those initial reactions to situations. You think tens of thousands of thoughts a day; your imagination will sometimes go astray, down lines of thinking that aren’t helpful.

But as for lingering in the negativity and the fear, as for that being your dominant way of thinking and feeling, that is something you can change for sure. You can still have the thoughts pop up, the fears arise, but you won’t get as emotionally invested in them, they will not be as consuming. They won’t have as much energy around them.

And without this strong ‘charge’ they won’t have as much power to influence your reality because the ‘charge’ is emotion, which is the true influence of your energy, not the words in your head.

Each time you make this choice, you build momentum of the energy that serves you, and break up the momentum of the energies that don’t. And it gets easier and easier.

Focus on Overall Energy

I can’t stress enough the importance of tending to your well-being overall to help get into a better head space, a better energy more consistently. I know we want specific things, and want to do this energetic ‘work’ to manifest them. I know we hope to achieve some sort of energy that will make us impervious to a variety of experiences that we have judged as ‘bad’ and ‘unwanted.’

I get we often have very specific goals and reasons for engaging with a teaching like this.

It’s okay if you are working on your energy as it relates to a particular area of your life, but don’t forget the huge benefit of general vibrational management. It will have a ripple effect throughout your entire life.

As you feel better overall, take better care of yourself, reduce your stress and anxiety, your perspective on everything will change to one that feels better. There is no ultimate, objective truth about any particular situation–it is all a matter of perception.

Any challenges you are dealing with now, any uncertainty, won’t trigger you so easily, you won’t automatically go to the worst-case scenario, you won’t be so pessimistic.

You might not just stop thinking about your problems altogether, but you will suffer less because your emotional response will be different. The thoughts won’t feel so heavy or intrusive.

That better-feeling state will make room to manifest solutions, opportunities, inspired actions, helpful information, assistance from people and anything else that will be of benefit somehow.

Your Turn

What did you think of the post? Anything resonate in particular? How do you deal with unwanted thoughts? Looking forward to your comment as always.

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