You know one of the reasons I love writing about law of attraction so much? Because just like anyone reading this, I have conditioning that I am working on stripping away, and much of what I write is a nice reminder for myself.
While I feel like I have a pretty good grasp on the concept, and have manifested many awesome things, I still run into resistance. It is certainly more subtle than it used to be, but still there at times.
I have set my sights on bigger and bolder things, and when we do that, new layers of ‘stuff’ get triggered that may have been laying dormant with previous manifesting efforts. I uncover beliefs that I never really knew I had, and then I work on shifting them. It really is a process, and if we can make peace with that, we are golden.
Anyway, once we start working consciously with our energy, and giving more mind to law of attraction, it is common for various sorts of discomfort to pop up. Being more aware of our role in shaping our reality, as well as what we are truly feeling and thinking, can make us a bit anxious. And this anxiety can certainly get in the way of manifesting with greater ease. Here are three of the more common anxieties that surface for many, and some insight on getting past them.
Feeling Like You Have to Figure Out Your Ultimate End Result Now
So, now you know you can create whatever reality you desire. Nothing is off limits, and there is no more lamenting you can’t have what you want. You are in the driver’s seat. Ask and it is given. Awesome, awesome, awesome.
Now all you have to do is set some intentions, gain some clarity and start building some momentum behind that more positive energy. You have to work on focusing on what you want instead of what you don’t. Simple enough.
But, then a bit of anxiety may creep in. You may not be exactly sure what it is you want, or you have a pretty clear idea but it seems like such a giant leap from where you are now, you can’t possibly see how you would manifest it.
You may feel some pressure to figure out how you want to live out the rest of your days on earth right in this moment. There are some ideas floating around, but nothing too concrete. It may make you reluctant to take any sort of action for fear of making the ‘wrong’ decision. You may feel a bit stuck and unsure of what to do. This can be really frustrating.
It’s okay if you are not fully sure of your vision. You don’t have to figure out how you want every aspect of your life to look. You don’t need to make any bold decisions that carry implications for the next two decades. You don’t need every piece of the puzzle to get moving.
Like I have said a million times before, you are after feelings, and nothing more. Everything we want is because we think it will make us feel good in some way. We want the peace, happiness, fulfillment, freedom and anything else that makes us feel all is right with the world.
So, when in doubt, follow your feelings. Figure out how you want to feel, and if something pops up that allows you to feel that way, go for it. You may keep going down that road or you may shift course and go down another one. Remember you are always moving towards what you want, and no matter what choices you make, they are going to serve you in some way. It’s all good..you can’t make any mistakes, you can’t be ‘wrong.’
So, pursue that different line of work if it feels right, even if you are not sure how it will work out. Sign up for that random class at the community college even if you are not sure right now if you would end up going back to school officially.
Remember we attract based on what we feel, and not our exact actions. So, if you pursue avenues that allow you to feel good now, you will attract more stuff that feels like that. You will become a better match to all sorts of ideas, opportunities, people and solutions that will keep you moving in the right direction, even if you aren’t quite sure where you will end up.
Being Convinced Certain Outside Elements Must Change First, Particularly Other People
Getting LOA in theory and actually believing it to the core are two different things. It can take awhile to really buy into certain concepts. Over time, we see how things change when we work with our energy, and the trust builds. The knowing deepens.
So, after learning a bit about law of attraction, you come to realize nothing can impact your reality in any real way besides your own energy. This means the bad economy can’t keep your business from succeeding. It means that no matter your race, religion, gender or sexual orientation, you can reach your fullest potential and no one can keep you down.
But, being we are so used to living reactively, and believing things outside of us, particularly other people, play a large role in the outcomes of our own lives, this is not something you will just release immediately.
You may have set your sights on certain things you want, but immediately put together a mental catalog of all the outside circumstances that would need to change to make your manifestation possible, or at least, make getting it a hell of a lot easier.
I get how challenging this can be. Based on the usual way of thinking, it is very easy to make a case that certain things can’t happen for you unless particular elements outside of you change.
Would it make for an easier journey if the things that were standing in your way somehow transformed more to your liking? Absolutely.
Should you focus your energy on trying to control things you can’t control, or pushing against what is and wishing it was different, rather than your own focus, which is where the magic really happens? Absolutely not.
You can take control, and it doesn’t matter what is happening outside of you, or what other people are or aren’t doing. Your reality is a mirror of what is happening inside of you, which means that all that is required to change said reality is shifting your thoughts, beliefs and feelings. That is pretty great if you ask me.
You may think you can’t possibly start feeling better about your job as long as your boss continues to be the giant dick face he has always been. You may be convinced you can’t change your financial situation so long as your spouse is anxiety-ridden about money. You blame your negative mother for always bringing you down and zapping you of your budding positivity. But, no one can create in your reality. Other people can only affect you in so far as you let them.
Their beliefs can only impact your manifestations to the degree you also believe these things as well. That is where that discomfort comes from—the part of you that still believes those things is being triggered. Their actions can only affect you if you decide they will.
Again, I get it. This way of being is really new and this version of us is fragile and fledgling. It is easier to feel good (or better) when we have fewer things challenging us, when things are more to our liking, when other people are not triggering us and throwing us out of whack energetically.
But, to really get your manifesting on, you have to take ownership of your feelings and what manifestations come into your life. You have to start building some momentum behind the belief that no one is calling the shots but you. This won’t happen overnight, but you would be surprised how quickly you can progress with some deliberate effort to focus on this truth.
Being Scared Feeling Better Now Will Keep Things as They Are Now
You want what you want, and the idea of feeling better even if you don’t have it,throws your mind into a bit of a tizzy. It likens it to deciding you actually don’t want this thing, and it doesn’t like this one bit. You really don’t like how things are now, and the idea of them staying this way,fills you with a sense of dread.
We get very attached to the things we want; the feeling of wanting something is very powerful, and just releasing on that can feel uncomfortable, even though the feeling of wanting something that we don’t have, kind of sucks actually.
We believe that feeling of want is necessary to bring this thing into our experience. If we stop wanting, won’t it cancel the order? Will the Universe decide we don’t want this thing anymore, and undo all the machinations it had been engaging in to get it to us?
The thing is, though, the Universe can only deliver that to which we are a match; it can’t just give us what we want simply because we want it, and we are a good person who is trying oh so hard. It can’t defy our vibration. It is a neutral force—input and output.
You have to remember the feeling of want is actually not conducive to getting whatever it is you intend to manifest because that feeling is one of lack, of it isn’t here. And that isn’t how you would feel if you had this thing already is it now? No, no it isn’t.
We have certain predominant feelings, and we attract experiences that feel just like these feelings. So, this means you want to do your best to feel now like you would if you already had this thing. When you think about your desire, there is a predominant feeling that it is coming, that it is already yours.
This does not mean giving up on what you want, it simply means removing that feeling of ‘need.’ It means not refusing to feel better until you have what you want. It means stepping into the feelings that lie behind what you want now—again, at the risk of sounding like a broken record, you are always after a feeling. You can create feelings at any time, whether through doing certain activities, or simply daydreaming.
One of the reasons this can bother people so much is the false belief feeling good about how things are now means all of a sudden, having to like things you don’t like, and then staying stuck with what you don’t want.
But, you don’t have to do that. You don’t have to start loving things you hate. It’s okay to have preferences, and want bigger and better things. We never want to settle for just good enough, or think as long as we don’t totally hate something, we should find a way to be okay with it.
What you do want is to focus in on the things in your life now that can actually evoke some positive emotion in you, and make you feel more hopeful and optimistic. Turn your attention towards the good things in your life as it is right in this moment
You want to celebrate the smaller manifestations that will start to pop up once you start aligning more closely with what you want. You want to cultivate the trust what you want can materialize.You want to really feel that the sense of relief that comes with knowing your current discontent is not permanent, and things will start changing as you start changing.
What we focus on expands, and the more you feel good, the more things that will come into your experience that feel good. That is just how it works. It’s the law.
Don’t get so attached to your specific desires manifesting as the only way you can feel happy—I know that is what your mind is telling you. Don’t worry, you’ll get what you want. It may not look exactly the same, or it may not come in the exact way you picture it, but whatever it is, it will be all good. Whatever it is you want now is just the tip of the iceberg, and when you are open to just feeling good without a sense of attachment to how things have to look, you can let in so much more.
In Closing…
Now that you have opened yourself up to new possibilities and living more consciously, the fear that things won’t work out can be strong. It was one thing to not like your life and think you really couldn’t do much, and another to realize you can do quite a bit, but then struggle to see your desired results.
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Be willing to take things one step at a time, rather than making huge leaps that you really can’t buy into fully on an energetic level. Just trust things will come together as best you can, and follow your intuition. Be in the moment, and work on making each day great. When you’re not feeling good, it’s okay. Don’t push against it, or it will just intensify and drag on longer. Don’t forget to look for the good you have already created.
Your Turn…
What did you think of the post? Can you relate to any of these anxieties? Did any piece of advice particularly resonate with you? Has your work with LOA triggered any other anxieties you might add to this list? What tips do you have for dealing with the discomfort that pops up as you shift your energy? Looking forward to your awesome comments as always!
Oh this is awesome! 🙂
#2 is my biggest issue. I keep thinking that if only certain outside circumstances would change, I could have what I want. I have a bit of a problem with the first one as well. I have been focusing on being more grounded and living in the “here and now” the last couple of days. During a meditation last night, I actually got a message (from where, who knows?).
Last year I did lots of visualizing, lots of affirmations, lots of focusing on what I wanted, vision boards, the whole nine. It all felt so good. I was kind of living in the future for a while, but I still wasn’t seeing results. I went through a bit of anxiety over the past few weeks and then I got that wonderful message.
It told me it was time to let go and let the Universe do its thing. It knows what I want. I don’t have to keep “reminding” it. It said I needed to focus on the here and now and start enjoying my life as the way it is now in any way I can. I got some awesome ideas on things I can start doing to accomplish this (including a recording from Steve G Jones about living in the here and now that I got for $1 – Thanks for letting us know about that Kelli. I loaded up! 🙂 )
It’s so funny to see this post today as my meditation last night focused a lot on these very three things. The synchronicities are coming back. YAY! I just love this stuff!
Here’s to reaching the next level! 🙂
Hey Summer
Thanks for sharing your experience. I think you had one of those moments when we realize we were trying to control the situation more than we had been aware of, and perhaps not focusing as positively as we thought. Sometimes the energy underlying our ‘work’ is one of pushing against what is, or actually stating what we don’t want. It can be really subtle sometimes. That sounds like a powerful message and I suspect a big shift will be coming as a result. It can take awhile to really put our minds at ease about this whole thing and not try to be center stage of the creating process. Definitely do whatever came to you in that moment of clarity as those activities are perfect for you at this point in time.
I loaded up too..I think I bought like 40 or something!
To leveling up!
Great post, Kelli. I found your blog by way of Melody Fletcher’s site. It was very comforting to read that we don’t have to have things all figured out NOW (I know I want some good things, but I can keep an open mind towards what the result looks like). It’s always helpful to be reminded to find the positive in your current experience and to especially “celebrate” the smaller manifestations.
Hi Melanie
Isn’t it a comforting feeling? Our mind wants to figure stuff out and then decide how to get everything into place.That not knowing and just trusting can feel really uncomfortable sometimes. It will pop up here and there, and when it does, just don’t fight it. Let your mind know everything is going to be okay. It means well most of the time, but can really get in the way of this LOA stuff! Just set some more general intentions if you don’t have anything specific and really just think about how you want to feel. Your intuition will guide you, and you will start attracting things that will give you clarity.
There usually is at least a couple of things we can feel good about now in our lives currently, and shoring up that positive energy will be easier when we can look at concrete things we have now that are good, but we may have just been dismissing because we are used to having these things or because the pull of negative emotions regarding what we don’t can suck us in good.
A great blog post. Wow. I have so many feelings about LOA at the moment I can’t even begin to describe how I feel. I feel as though I have unlocked the secret of life. There is no reason to feel afraid about anything and I can have anything I want in life. As long as I actively work every day to feel good and release resistance things just get better and better and I am shown new things to help me feel good and get where I want. I can dream as big as I like and know that I will get there. But it’s more than getting material things, it’s spiritual and I feel as though I am getting closer to the Source. When you feel this good you just want to love everyone!
I have found that the more you feel good, and go with what feels good (or your instincts) then the more great stuff comes along. Then it goes along from there to get even better. It’s kind of exponential because the closer you move to feeling good, the further away you get from feeling bad. Also the more evidence you see the more you trust in LOA. And the more you trust, the more you can manifest. It’s like a big maze that gets better and better and I just want to see where it all ends. Do you have similar feelings Kelli?
Hi Bunny
Thanks so much. So glad you liked it. What you wrote is so beautiful, and I feel just like you do. When you really start seeing that ‘proof’ in your experience, it just gets so much easier to enter that state of surrender. Like you said, it truly is like unlocking the secret to life. When you realize what we truly are, things like anxiety, depression, worry and so many other negative emotions just start to weaken because the root of them is a sense of powerlessness, and lack of control, and we come to see this is not true at all.
As that trust grows, the sky really is the limit and we start allowing ourselves to want things we never would have even entertained previously.
Some good tips, Kelli. I’ve thought, before, “If I ease up on actively working on my desire then I won’t get what I want” but the more I learn about LOA, the more I see that you’re always moving towards it. Sometimes it’s good to have a rest and focus on other things.
Hi Ms. Moonsparkle
There is that part of us that feels like we must actively participate in some way, and if we don’t need to take action, then it must be thinking about what we want at all times. When it feels good, awesome, but when it doesn’t, we definitely want to note what comes up, deal with anything that seems ‘big’ and just put our focus elsewhere. Just always think back to the things you attracted that you really didn’t focus on at all..that always helps me.
Hi Kelli, thanks for your reply. It really does me help to focus on the things that came easily as well.
It really does. It is easy to forget all of our good manifestations the second we start focusing on something we don’t have yet. Not only is this remembering good for lifting our spirits, it reminds our brain that this worked once and it can work again. Giving it that ‘proof’ is very, very helpful.
I have a list of things I’ve manifested and also a “Dreams come true” list. The second one was suggested on Good Vibe Blog and I’ve also listed dreams that came true before I knew about LOA.
That dreams come true list is great…nothing can lift our spirits more than tuning into all the times our work with LOA actually got us results.
Wow, you are reading my mind!!! I came here to ask some questions and found this! How lovely. And I love the pic from Bali!
So, does this explain why dumb people make money and smart people do not? It must. The answer is their vibration. Maybe they just don’t get sad about anything and feel that they are the center of the universe, while a smart person would beat themselves up and writhe with pain from the regret. A regret is like the grieving process. The response is very similar, but some never forgive themselves because the mistake was too grave. Even though, as you very well state, it does not matter. Nothing really does, does it? Not only because, to the universe, it is all the same, as long as you are experiencing stuff and adding to its expansion, but you are right, you eventually end up where you need to be, so it does not matter if you take the scenic route so to speak. Maybe we needed to learn appreciation because we took things for granted before. This is my case, by the way. But, all could have been prevented had you just took the opportunity when it came, just like that. You said, “You have to remember the feeling of want is actually not conducive to getting whatever it is you intend to manifest because that feeling is one of lack, of it isn’t here. ” So, when we do not care about something, it just shows up. Really. When we do care and fret and all that, we push it even more out of our reach. Maybe cool nonchalance is the way to go.
Maybe dumb people just do not care, and everything goes well for them. Remember Mr Magoo? He did not even see and never got in trouble. I do not remember the details of the cartoon exactly, but he got out of a lot of jams from what I remember. Maybe we should be “blind” in the sense that we see what we want to and set the intention and it will come to pass. Like setting our own dial and following that.
HI K, me again. I sometimes wonder too why the ‘dumb’ (or insensitive, unkind, etc) people often get rich. I mean there are plenty of nice rich people but maybe we notice the dumb ones more because it gets our goat. Anyway, there is someone in my husband’s family who is loaded. Nice house, nice cars, nice holidays. They are not very smart, but more than that, they aren’t that nice. We are struggling and their way of dealing with it is to distance themselves. My husband says if it were the other way around he couldn’t live with himself if he behaved like that. Anyway I guess because they distance themselves from money problems that’s perhaps why they don’t have any. When it all seems too unfair, I always remember what Jesus said (I”m not religious but I believe Jesus was a bit LOA practitioner lol) “the meek shall inherit the earth”. It’s time for the sensitive people who care about others and the world to rise up and we will be running the show soon enough. Perhaps because we have learned how to use LOA?
Hey Bunny
It can get our goat to see people who have money who don’t ‘deserve’ it, but as we know from studying LOA, deserving doesn’t factor in since there is no judgment on a Universal level. On the human level, that is another story! I think the money issue is big because a lot of people try to attract it to add to their sense of happiness and well-being, and since that is what money represents to them, that is a state they must achieve to get around the blocks. But for other people, money may represent something completely different, and actually be a source of great distress in one form or another. And since we are doing this whole LOA thing because we want to be happy, we realize that we don’t want to be like those people who are unhappy but have money. It can be hard to draw our attention away from other people’s manifestations, and it is natural to question why other people attract what they do, but most times, that just takes us down an unproductive path. Us in the ‘know’ just need to keep our eye towards getting all shiny and happy, and as for the rest, it doesn’t matter!
Yes, Kelli, you are right and thanks for reminding me to just focus on myself and not on others. It just gets to me at times, but I let it all out and them feel better. These are the enigmas of life, right?
Cool as a cucumber is a nice model to live by.
Bunny,
Thank you so much for your examples and input. I really do appreciate them.
I had read that the Jesus quote meant something like “those who do not trouble themselves with stuff” or something along those lines. Those are the “meek” he meant; I think it was in an LOA post where I read it. So, in essence, even if we are sensitive, which is a blessing, we should not trouble our minds and hearts with crap and take care of ourselves and preserve ourselves that way. Cool as a cucumber.
I do agree with you. I think sensitive people are more evolved and should be running things period, and can’t wait for the shift to take place already.
Hi K
Thanks so much. So glad you enjoyed the post. As far as other people go, and what they manifest, it is always helpful to remember that we have no idea what is in other people’s vibrations, and what their manifestations mean to them. For example, money could be an amplifier for some sort of negative belief and attracting it is actually problematic for them in some way. When we start working consciously with law of attraction, it is common to begin wondering how some people manifest the things they do, but you will be better off if you just turn your attention towards yourself. It is challenging enough to figure out what our own manifestations mean to us personally let alone other people’s!
You are right that nothing matters in the sense there is no judgment and there is no inherent meaning in anything..we decide whether we think something is good or bad.
I love that..cool nonchalance…a great way to go about manifesting with greater ease. It’s tough sometimes, especially when it comes to things we really want or think we ‘need.’
You may have a point about the Mr. Magoos of the world..if there isn’t too much going on upstairs, less mental blocks to get in the way 🙂
Hi Kelli,
“No one can create in your reality.” I love that. I learned that also when I started to learn more about LOA. We always blame others for our feelings and actions but the reality is you’re giving them the power. Your happiness and achievements do not have to be dependent upon another person.
You always have a choice. Surrendering is also a choice.
~Lea
Hi Lea
It is a great realization to have..makes everything seem so much more possible when we think no one can jack things up for us if we decide they won’t! YOU are so right about giving away our power when we do that. We’re emotional beings, and naturally sometimes we are going to let other people affect us, but the more we can remember this, the weaker that tendency is, and when it does happen, it doesn’t last as long. We always do have a choice, don’t we? It’s wonderful!
Hi Kelli! I found your blog by way of Melody Fletcher’s site (a comment you left, with a link to this post.) And I have to say, I really love the way you communicate, and the way you articulate emotionally, just reading your post raised my vibration! And this post really hit home for me, and reminded me of so much important stuff. My journey as of late has been rough and traumatic, in so many ways. And it’s left me feeling exhausted mentally and emotionally at times. Me and my mother are recently homeless, though we are in a shelter now, previously we were riding the train, and sleeping in hospital waiting rooms. That situation alone was a scary one to say the least. Looking back, it’s still hard to believe we made it through that. The only thing I could do was keep telling myself that this pain and difficulty was transient, that I am not trapped in this forever. And I believed every bit of it, though it took some work. This mindset did make it easier to go forth with all of what it situation called for, even though I was scared. I wish I could say It made the situation more comfortable, but I can say that it made it easier to not be so attached to those negative emotions, as we so often do. For me, and for a lot of people, I think, it’s not so much about focusing on feeling bad, as it is not putting the right amount of perspective on those emotions, and realizing that it won’t be that way forever. Right now, I can say that things are getting considerably better for myself and my mother, though there are aspects of our current place that can get nerve racking, like financial stresses. I just try to not let it get me down for too long, not get wrapped up in it, and remember that just as our time of being out on the street didn’t last forever, that these hard times won’t last forever, either. This post reminded me to take things day to day. So thanks so much for posting this, and I think I’ll be sticking around your blog for awhile!
Hi Aminah
Wow…reading about your experience and how you are handling it really blew my mind. There is so much wisdom in your words, and for you to be able to do what you are doing from such a set of circumstances, you are setting yourself up for some top-notch manifestations. Perspective is everything, and the most amazing people who do the most amazing things often went through these sorts of challenges. This experience, while certainly trying at times, is presenting a huge gift in terms of growth. I can feel your awesome energy through cyberspace.
Aw, thanks Kelli! Yes, I have to say that while this experience has been so trying, I’ve learned patience, and so many other valuable lessons that I can’t say I regret this situation at all. Also, going through this has opened my eyes to all the little, day to day manifestations that I would otherwise overlook due to stress or frustration. That’s why posts like these are a hit with most of us, we all just have to remember, once we take conscious control of our reality, and decide to be happy, it’s ALL good!
Hi Aminah
Again, your perspective is truly amazing, and with everything you are learning from it, and all the energetic shifting you will be able to do as a result,there is no way you can ever regret it, even if at times, it is upsetting. That is normal as you are human after all! I am so glad you mentioned the smaller manifestations–that is proof you are lining up with your more desired reality. It is easy to dismiss them because we still may not fully be where we are, but they are the indicators we are getting there. That you have patience will serve you well! Things can turn around at any moment, and I have no doubt you will end up more than okay.
Hi Kelli;
I found your post by chance and I feel like I was lead right to it. Your way of communicating is really clear and easy to make sense of. I feel more joyful just reading it and am excited about all the possibilities. I feel like I just had a big hug from the Universe! Thank you!
Hi Vanessa
Thanks so much. Isn’t it great how LOA works? Lead right to something that helps you feel better in the moment. I am glad you find my writing style pleasing to your mind..that is always an important component of resonating with material and digesting it. There are oh so many possibilities, and just acknowledging them, even if you aren’t fully sure how this LOA stuff works, or how things will unfold exactly, is a very powerful first step, and is enough to get some energy moving in a more positive direction.
WOW Kelli, if this was the last blog post I could EVER read again this would be the one! It still blows my mind how what you write just resonates with my soul so deeply and I get it, I really do. You put it all in such a way that it really hits home and helps me on deeper levels. I truly can’t express my gratitude enough for what you do, what you write and who you are in this world. You’re changing lives for the better. Thank you for that.
Corin
Hi Corin
Wow, that comment made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I started this blog because I just wanted to share all the things I learned that helped me change my life, and to see it is actually helping others, means more to me than I can express in words. I am so glad that my content resonates with you on such a deep level..when we find those types of materials, we can really get into the groove of making the changes we want to make because we are getting information that is perfect for us in that moment.
Hello! Kelli!
Thanks for the post!
What do you think about self-love?
When I make mistakes while applying LOA to my reality, I regret, beat myself up and get self-critical. If I stop doing it, I know I will be in much better place. How can I be more generous about myself making mistakes and get back up?
Hi Emily
I am so glad you enjoyed it. You are certainly not alone in that..we all do it to some degree. Learning we are in complete control of our experience is very empowering for sure, but then on the flipside, that can lead us to be overly critical of ourselves and really put a lot of pressure on ourselves to manifest and get things ‘right.’
One of the things that helps me most is to look back on all the things I did manifest in the past…that reminds me of my power. It is easy to get hyper focused on a particular manifestation with which we are struggling, and totally forget that we have done this with success before. I also try to view myself how I would view a friend sharing their same struggles and experiences, and I would never ever criticize and judge them the way I would myself.
Also remember that you are now operating in a way that is still quite unfamiliar compared to years upon years living in a totally different reality. To just master it right out the gate is possible in theory I suppose, but in practice, it will take a bit of work to undo the conditioning and build the trust. None of us are perfect, and we don’t have to be to be able to create all sorts of awesome!