So I have a question that is a bit hard to explain. If feeling better is the key, than rather than giving up something that makes us feel bad, can we simply work on changing perspective and feeling better. For example lets say you have a certain person that you feel like you should stop talking to, but rather than following through with that can I just instead work on my energy around it and stay in connection with him? Or, instead of eating healthier can I simply change perception about junk food and keep eating the way I am and loose the weight? I hope this makes sense!
There really isn’t a simple yes or no answer to this question…it really depends on the ‘bad’ situation and actions. But in the context of the examples she gave, it leans more towards ‘no.’ You probably can’t keep doing that stuff for a variety of reasons; it’s probably having a very recognizable effect on you, and you know something needs to change. The fact this person is even asking shows she probably already knows the answer! Part of what I write here will address some of the underlying energies and what not that make us ponder such things.
It’s not so much what we’re doing, it’s why that matters in terms of evaluating the impact, whether or not it’s ‘bad,’ and how this may all be affecting our energy.
And for the times when the answer is ‘yes’ you’ll recognize that a shift in perspective can do the trick. So long as you are always honestly assessing what is happening inside, the answers to these sorts of questions aren’t as elusive as they seem; the confusion we feel is not really necessary.
All this usually comes when we’re not being honest. Honesty will be a conscious creator’s best friend–our energy is whatever it is, and there will be no ‘work around’ for manifesting changes in your life if what’s happening inside is not lending itself to them. We have to recognize when this is the case so we can tweak what needs to be tweaked.
Things Probably Won’t Change Unless We Do
If our reality is influenced by the contents of our inner world, if on the physical level, our experience day- to- day is shaped by the sum of our habits, choices, behaviors, actions and the like, if we’re not where we want to be, if we’re experiencing ‘problems,’ it’s very unlikely we can see any real change in our lives if we stay basically the same.
If most of us are honest, if we could find a way to get all the stuff we wanted without having to change ourselves or our lives in any way, we’d be down in a second. Totally get that.
But all this personal growth work starts to reveal one very core nugget of wisdom–nothing outside of us will ever make us happy, nothing outside of us will heal our wounds or fix our inside in any way.
Accepting this is life-changing. We want to do this work or else we’ll never enjoy anything that shows up; each manifestation would be nothing more than temporary relief of the ‘ick’ which will surface again sooner than later. We’ll never enjoy our life in any real way since the present moment will always be relegated to creating something even better in the future, a new thing to take the pain away. Nothing will ever be enough. We’ll never enjoy the journey, and like you have probably heard countless times before…that’s all there is.
But I digress….
It’s been said countless times that perspective is the cause of our feelings, not what’s happening. There is no true objective meaning to any experience, and we simply layer some sort of story on top, usually a story that feels really badly in 10 different ways.
So changing perspective is a core element of energy work, of healing pain from the past and all that jazz. And in some cases, that alone can be sufficient for a particular situation. We may be viewing things in a way that isn’t totally accurate and as our beliefs change, we see things in a different light. So many views we saw as objective ‘fact’ are anything but.
You may really dislike someone for example, but then you do some inner work, see what’s really going on, and start feeling totally different about this person; you relate to them completely differently; you take responsibility for your shit ,and your emotional reactions, realizing it was never about them.
You may not become friends, you still may not like them as a person, but you can now be around them without any issue. It’s not necessary to stop attending gatherings where they are, or having any discussion with them about how you feel , the nature of your relationship or anything like that. Whatever buttons they were pushing were addressed and this person is no longer of any significance in your world.
But sometimes, this change of perspective isn’t sufficient, we know on some level, we need to make certain changes in our lives, we need to do things differently, we need to spend less time around certain people or let them go.
The good news is, as we realize all that lies behind what’s going on inside, the reluctance to make them lessens, they usually don’t feel as hard as we think they would be now; they may still feel uncomfortable at the time, but we’ll deal with it much better. We know it’s the best course of action.
You’ve gone through a break-up, and you’re trying to be ‘friends,’ for example. But you’re really struggling emotionally, feeling hurt, rejected,etc… Could you change perspective on this situation, seeing that whatever happened was supposed to happen, that however the person treated you had nothing to do with you, that whatever painful stories your mind is telling you about it, are untrue?
Could you be thankful for the experience, could you thank your ex for playing such a helpful role in your growth and then be BFF’s? Yeah, sure.
But unless that’s how you’re TRULY feeling right now, being around this person, keeping them in your life, trying to be ‘friends’, probably isn’t the best tack for your healing.
If you’re at a point where you’re open to dating again, starting another relationship, it will be very hard because energetically, there is no ‘space’ for these people to show up. You can’t fully process the situation because the ‘wounds’ basically fully reopen every time you speak. All your mental and emotional energy is on this person and again, no space.
Certain changes in our life are just necessary. And this brings me to my next point…
Sometimes This Stuff is Hard
Do we have to suffer to earn our happiness? Are we only worthy of the good stuff if we make all sorts of sacrifices? Is this journey inherently supposed to be hard?
The answer to all these questions is ‘no.’ BUT, sometimes this journey will be hard, it will be really hard. But if we accept that, it makes the hard parts a lot easier to deal with. We won’t suffer nearly as much as we do. Things feel less hard when we recognize them as such.
We have to understand we’re the ones that make it hard, but it’s just par for the course, that we’ll have tendencies, and what not, that are certainly going to get in the way, and we have to deal with it.
We have all sorts of conditioning that is working against us big-time and breaking free of it does take some conscious effort.
Our mind’s whole MO is based on fear, and it is the space from which we have been living our whole lives, from which we make pretty much every decision. Moving out of a space that has led us to act against our own best interest at pretty much every turn is no small task emotionally speaking.
The dysfunction of our mind manifests countless ways in our life, and it is the root of all our vibrational ‘discord. And once we see this, we have to stop doing things its way, we have to stop seeing things its way, we have to stop letting it convince us the way it wants to do things is best for us.
That’s not easy…all the changes we’re being asked to make in our belief system, how we focus, how we view the world and ourselves ,are seen as a direct threat to its survival. So it puts up quite the fight.
We have lots of emotional ‘shit’ that needs to be unloaded if we want to change our vibe in any real way, if we actually want to be happier. Nothing outside is going to fix this, and this can be a really sobering, unsettling realization. These feelings suck and we don’t want to feel them. We don’t want to make changes that are going to trigger them, force us to deal with them.
There are lots of changes we’ll have to make that will feel hard or uncomfortable in some way, and our mind is really good at convincing us that this alone is a valid reason not to make them. But it’s not. Yeah, it’s hard to not talk to your ex anymore, it’s hard to set boundaries, it’s hard to learn new skills that will advance your career, it’s hard to build your solo venture when you’re still working full-time.
But if that’s our reasoning for not doing them, we have to realize all the problems that stem from this are on us. If we keep doing things we know are bad because it’s hard not to, we have to accept the consequences of that.
We can’t manifest significant lasting change in our life, we can’t solve all our problems unless we change inside what needs to be changed.
We probably won’t become much different unless we actively try to be different.
We probably just won’t magically develop certain desirable qualities unless we practice them, consciously try to cultivate them. We probably just won’t all of a sudden become ‘patient’ for example. We become that way by consciously trying to be that way in situations where we would normally react with ‘impatience.’
We can’t manifest the amazing boyfriend, the large sums of money and all that if we’re not ‘being’ the person who is a match to them. And achieving this ‘being’ usually requires some ‘doing’ in the way of this inner exploration and ‘work.’
Honoring Our ‘Limitations’ in Thinking
The question of whether you can lose weight while still eating junk food is a good example since it deals with the physical body, an area where we often have a harder time seeing the link between energy, and what happens with it, an area where we may have a harder time believing any exists in the first place.
There are countless stories of people doing things that don’t affect their physical body the way it ‘should’ given what we understand about the body, how it functions, its ‘limits,’ etc…
Indian gurus who have been observed not eating or drinking anything for extended periods of time yet are perfectly healthy; people who have exposed their bodies to extremely cold temperatures that would be considered deadly, that would cause all sorts of harm to the body, and nothing; running marathons in the desert with no hydration. People who are deeply devoted to certain spiritual and energetic practices , and literally look decades younger than they are, whose bodies are in a state that just shouldn’t be possible given the aging process.
So if all this is possible, it’s probably possible to lose weight regardless of what you eat.
The thing about these sorts of people though is they have developed their mind and mental conditioning in a way that the average person probably wouldn’t be interested in; The beliefs they have about the body are on a level most of us are lacking.
Many of these people have been able to achieve this sort of energy because they have largely detached from the ‘worldly’ life and all that comes with it, including the desire for many of the things the average person cares about getting, and probably will always care about.
We have a lot of conditioning and strong belief around what influences our weight, what sorts of foods are ‘good’ and ‘bad’ and all that.
The amount of mental work to overcome that conditioning is probably a lot harder than just accepting these beliefs and working with them in your effort to lose weight.
Certain ‘limiting’ beliefs can be helpful in that they help create positive expectation, abiding by them makes you believe you’ll get where you want to be, achieve some desired result.
I had a period a few years back where I gained a lot of weight, and my journey showed me it really was energy above all else, as far as what led to gaining and losing it .
Same goes for keeping it off since during the time of actively losing it, and after it came off, I’ve probably been more ‘lax’ with my diet than I was even during the period I put it all on. But do these sorts of foods comprise the majority of what I eat? Not even close. But when I want to eat them, I do without any energetic conflict.
I really don’t want to eat that way all the time anyway, so it’s not a problem . Very few people eat that way because of a true love of that type of food…there’s usually something going on.
I like eating healthy…I do believe it makes a positive contribution and I’ve eaten pretty healthy most of my adult life. I enjoy these types of foods, I feel better when I eat them. Same line of thinking for exercise. Incorporating this ‘belief’ is not hard, it doesn’t feel like a sacrifice, it’s welcome.
If money is just energy, then it’s obviously possible to manifest it without even having a source of income. But how many of us could feel SO clear on this, we would just quit our jobs, have no plans to start our own business, and have total faith the money would come? That we believe we need to take some sort of ‘action’ to earn money is technically a ‘limiting’ belief but it’s not necessarily a ‘bad’ one.
If physical illness is just a manifestation of various kinds of energetic ‘discord,’ repressed emotions and the like, then that ‘inner work’ is all that would be necessary to heal. But many of us have faith in external remedies, conventional and alternative.
To completely abandon all that would probably be very uncomfortable. If you believe certain supplements or diet changes would help, then incorporating them is a good thing, without putting too much faith in anything outside. This was my experience when healing a health issue I had a few years back.
Essentially, the perspectives we would need to adopt to see certain changes, the level of ‘belief’ we would need to achieve CONSISTENTLY, without addressing issues ,or making changes, we have been led to believe are absolutely essential, or at least, important, are ones we may have a hard time buying into 1000 percent without a doubt.
Your Turn
What did you think of the post? Anything resonate in particular? Have you had any experience with this issue? Looking forward to your comments as always.
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So…how do you move through and past all of these things that are probably limiting us…even understanding what they are…real vs. contrived….sounds like a life journey to me…lol….
Hi Rebecca
Yes a life journey for sure! The core thing that helps us make this transition is our willingness to trust our intuitive/emotional resonance with these new beliefs and perspectives we start learning about, means something, that it is our way to recognize and connect with these truths. Once we have that foundation, everything that doesn’t fall in line with these ideas goes in the ‘reject’ pile. And this leads to energetic shifts that get mirrored back to us, and this ‘proof’ just strengthens the belief. We get stuck when we keep trying to do this all at the level of the mind and intellect because we try to evaluate the info in a way that it can’t really be evaluated, we look for explanations and ‘proof’ to satisfy the mind, and it just never seems to happen.