My mind is always trying to jump ahead and figure things out. What can I do to live more in the present moment?
From an energetic perspective, living more in the present moment holds great power.
Ruminating and lamenting the past makes it hard to believe things can be different; we focus in ways that don’t come close to serving us. Going through the catalog of our past experiences reinforces all the crappy beliefs that keep us stuck where we are; it reinforces the shitty self-image we hold. It mires us down in regret and bitterness.
We think if we never broke up with our ex, if we just took that job, or did or didn’t do this thing or that thing, our life would be so much better now, when in reality, we have no idea how these choices would have impacted our lives. We don’t think of the potential challenges that might have come with these particular decisions, how they would have affected other aspects of our life.
It leads us to all sorts of destructive behaviors that help us cope with the pain from overeating to abusing drugs to simply spending all our time staring at one screen or another to distract us from our thoughts.
Focusing on the future also comes with a whole set of problems, even when that focus is ‘positive.’ We worry about a variety of potential outcomes to our current problem to which we feel extremely resistant. Worry about not getting what we want leads us to make choices out of fear, choices that are light years away from being in our best interest, like getting back together with your shitty ex-boyfriend because what if someone better doesn’t come along?
We’re always trying to figure out ‘how’ we’ll get what we want, ‘how’ we’ll get to where we want to be, and in most cases, we can’t really do that, at least not to the degree our mind would like. It wants to see every freaking step, it wants to control every aspect. Good luck with that. And being fueled by a deep fear we won’t get what we want, this inability to figure it all out makes for a very specifically unpleasant type of tension.
The ‘positive’ focus can be a problem too because it tends to relegate the present moment to a mere stepping stone to some other point in the future. We’re always trying to get somewhere else; where we are now will never really be good enough.
The future is always ‘better’ because there, we’ll have this or that thing, we’ll be happier then. All our visualizing, and other energy work to effect change in the future, has an undercurrent of tension and anxiety, again, because we’re antsy to get somewhere else other than where we are now.
It’s one thing to look forward to things in the future we hope to see in our life, it’s another to always want to be thinking about these things because we don’t like where we are now, and we don’t want to deal with the feelings. It’s okay to want to bring certain things into your life, but it’s another to miss out on all the good that you have now because your mind thinks everything in the future will surely be ‘better.’
Considering the ‘now’ is the only thing that’s real, that’s where all our power is from an energy perspective. The past isn’t real–it was a series of ‘now’s’ that already passed. The future as we see it, isn’t real either. Five minutes, one month or one year from now will just be another ‘now.’
In the immediate moment, everything is always ‘okay.’ If we were to really tune into this immediate moment , like this literal NOW, there’s rarely any true problem or issue, and if there is, we’re not really ‘worrying’ about it, we’re just dealing with it because it’s right in front of our face.
You don’t worry about things that are in the process of happening–it may be causing certain negative feelings but this is a very different experience than worrying about something that hasn’t happened yet, that may NEVER happen, and again, you just deal with it.
Most of what we’re worrying about is in what we think of as the ‘future.’ You’re worrying about the bills due in two weeks, the doctor’s appointment at the end of the month or whether you’ll have enough money to retire in 20 years.
So how do we exist more in the present moment, and stop living almost constantly in the past and future?
Understanding and Making Peace with Your Mind
The first thing we want to realize is our mind will never stop doing the shit it does. This really isn’t a problem so long as we make the conscious effort not to get too wrapped up, and emotionally invested in, said’ shit.’ It won’t be a problem if we give up our insistence on listening and deferring to it, which is just mere habit.
Your mind has no power in the present moment, which is why it doesn’t like you trying to stay there. None of its bullshit serves you there; its mode of operating has no use there. When you’re in a space of greater presence and awareness, you see its games, you see its nonsense, and it loses its power, it loses its grip on you.
When you are simply in the present, enjoying the moment, or letting it be what it is if you’re not enjoying it, what is there for your mind to do? Very little.
This scares the crap out of your mind because it threatens its survival; it threatens to dismantle the belief system and self-image it created, and therefore is very attached to.
That its beliefs and perspectives make you miserable, and screw with your life in countless ways, is of no consequence to your mind. Whether your’re happy, emotionally healtlhy and all that jazz…couldn’t give a fuck.
If you realize all that crap isn’t you, and anchor yourself more strongly to the part of you that’s observing all this mental chatter, and the emotions that result from it, you don’t get sucked in. The volume gets turned down dramatically. What was once at the forefront of your mind screaming for your attention–and getting it each and every time–feels more distant and muted.
When your thoughts are traveling back to the past, or projecting into the future, not all of you goes along for the ride anymore. You’re more rooted in the present moment, where again, everything is usually A-OK. You focus more on what you’re doing in the present moment, whether it’s washing the dishes, going for a walk or having a conversation with a friend.
When you’re intensely present in the now, all that past-and-future-oriented mind chatter just dies down, it doesn’t grab your attention. When you find yourself going there, you shut it down more quickly and easily.
You see the pain this way of thinking brings you, and you start reaching a point where you see the insanity of engaging with your mind in a way that triggers and feeds it. We’re kind of addicted to this pain, and the addiction wanes.
It ultimately comes down to making the conscious choice to immerse yourself more in the present moment, even when you don’t like it. Accept ‘what is’ in the immediate moment.
Making Peace with Where You Are Now
This is a non-negotiable for living more in the ‘now,’ for cultivating an energy friendly to the changes you want to see in your life. The only reason we have such problems remaining in the ‘now’ is because we have all sorts of problems with what’s happening ‘now.’
We can recognize a challenging circumstance, like financial issues, for example, but it only becomes a ‘problem’ when we let our mind label it as such, and rustle up all these unpleasant emotions. It’s only a ‘problem’ when we agree with our mind as such, and we believe the story it’s telling about what’s happening.
We’re intensely resisting ‘what is’ and somehow your mind thinks this helps matters. But remember the Universe is not responding to your wanting, your needing, or your dissatisfaction with your life. It’s responding to your dominant energy in a neutral, clinical, mechanical, dispassionate, disinterested way.
If you understand, and are WILLING to accept a few crucial truths, living in the present moment will be much easier.
The first one is…your circumstances are not causing your negative feelings. They’re triggering something deep inside that was already there. They’re pushing a button. Your reactions to what’s happening are not materializing out of thin air. There is some belief, some perspective, some view of yourself, some sort of ‘programming’ that is being ‘activated.’ There is some sort of emotional ‘conditioning’ that has formed over your life and dictates your reactions to certain events without your conscious participation at all.
The second is that your mind is telling a story about these circumstances that feels really shitty, that is almost 100 percent guaranteed to be complete bullshit. It’s drawing all sorts of conclusions it has no business drawing based on a very limited set of ‘data’,’ based on an extremely limited understanding of energy and the true nature of reality. Its belief system is built on a foundation of deep, deep fear about pretty much everything.
The third is realizing your unwanted circumstances are just neutral feedback of your dominant thoughts, feelings, beliefs and ways of focusing. THAT’S IT. This ties into the second issue of the fucked-up, untrue story. I can almost guarantee the reasons your mind thinks why what’s happening is happening are dead wrong. If you see your circumstances as this neutral feedback, you stop getting so bent out of shape about them. You realize you have total power to change them by way of changing the contents of your inner world.
If the energy changes, your circumstances have NO CHOICE but to change. The key here though is being open to how this all unfolds, suspending judgment of manifestations your mind wants to label ‘bad,’ and being willing to see how they may be serving you, and trusting things happen in the perfect time. How is this perfect time determined you ask? No fucking clue…just know it does.
Gotta Deal with Your Shit
This might be my most common section heading, but I talk about this a lot with good reason. So sorry, not sorry as they say. It’s our biggest issue. The only reason are problems are ‘problems’ is because they make us feel a way we don’t want to feel. The only reason we have such fear and anxiety surrounding getting our ‘stuff’ is because we are looking to them to take away all our crappy feelings. If we don’t get them, we don’t get to feel better, and that juts makes us feel even worse.
If we deal with our shit, we’ll feel better in the present moment. If we’re feeling better in the present moment, we’re not as anxious for things to change as quickly as possible, because again, that desire for change is largely stemming from our desire to make our shitty feelings go away. If we’re less anxious about things changing as quickly as possible, the ‘now’ becomes much more bearable, and enjoyable.
So you have to be honest about the energy driving your desires–why do you want what you want so badly? The more attached you are, the more shit you’re looking for the manifestation to fix–no two ways about it. If you keep trying to manifest from a space of minimizing pain, the present moment and all its power, will always elude you; you’ll never be able to cultivate trust and faith in the process because your mind will always be in the mode of trying to figure things out, manipulate, control, strategize and troubleshoot.
When it really starts to sink in the lack of this thing or that thing isn’t the true cause of our negative feelings, therefore getting them isn’t the answer to getting rid of them, we’re not in such a mad rush to get them, we can fucking relax for a moment.
We’ll certainly still think about the future; we’ll still want certain things, we’ll still work towards certain goals. That’s all fine and good.
But we’ll stop operating from the space, at least primarily, of thinking all this stuff needs to happen before we can feel better, before we can feel whole and complete. We’ll change the value we’ve been assigning to these ‘wants.’ ;the ‘need’ starts dissipating because we buy less into the delusion these things have any real power to influence our happiness and well-being.
Living more in the present moment means the joy we get from an action is the reward in and of itself because we’re not focusing as much on the ‘result’ or ‘outcome.’ We’re doing things for our business for example, because they’re fun and we feel passionate about it, not just a means to an end, a way to get something from someone else, to get money or recognition. In the moment they feel really good, and if that’s where the bulk of our attention is, this is perfectly good enough.
Your mind makes a great case for why you don’t get to feel better until your circumstances change, and from the space it operates, these arguments make good sense. But the space from which you are trying to operate now, they don’t hold an ounce of water.
Your mind is basically holding your happiness hostage…you can stop it from doing that. But it requires you to make the conscious choice to reject its nonsense not just once, but over and over again. The more you do it, the easier it gets, the more momentum you build behind the energy and ways of thinking, being and feeling that serve you.
Your Turn
What did you think of the post? Anything resonate in particular? How do you live more in the present moment? Looking forward to your comments as always.
Have a question you think would make a good blog post? Submit it here.
Want to learn how to ‘want’ without ‘needing?’ I’ll bet you do! Check out my new call series starting April 18th. Because of the importance of this topic, I felt inspired to offer a ‘pay what you choose’ option so everyone who wants to join can do so. Check it out here.

Very helpful. Thanks. This could have been written for me.
You are very welcome. Glad you enjoyed it!
Yet again Kelli….GOLD!! Thank you!
Thanks Pam! Glad you enjoyed it
That is the best piece of writing I have ever read on the true power of now. I think I’ll be reading this every day for a while. Thanks a million for your excellent podcast as well. Cheers to you and yours!
Hi Una
Thanks so much for your comment…I am glad it was so impactful. From an energy perspective, there is great power in ‘now!’ And great peace too, which is what we ultimately want!
Heya again!
Reread again a couple of days ago. Still getting more from it. One of the things that stands out about ‘the power of now’ in general is that it isn’t a measure of time. It isn’t a second or a nanosecond, it isn’t porridge, toast, or a pear (stole that last silly bit from KitH), it just is. I love the hiking analogy below. Partly because I love hiking, and mostly because it brings focus to the forefront. Really immersing yourself in NOW. Now is a beautiful paradox to me: single pointed focus plus infinity. Thanks again!
Hi Una
Thanks for such a wonderful comment. You are so right about it not being ‘time.’ It’s the best place to be!
I just got back from a 5 day hiking tour in Peru – Salkantay Trek in the Andes Mountains – and up until this trip I’ve been telling myself to chill out, relax and just live in the now. Let me say that saying this to yourself is not what moves the energy. You actually have to practice it in order to get the momentum of it moving!
Let me explain….when facing the mountain trails on this hike at 14,000 + feet of elevation it was literally only look down at the path right in front of you, concentrate on your feet moving forward, don’t look too far ahead or you will get discouraged at how high the next incline is, don’t look too far to the left or right because it is a sheer drop off of the side of the mountain and definitely don’t look behind you to see where everyone else is; set your own pace.
Each step I took I used the mantra “I’m only concerned with the step right NOW” or “every step is a sure step” to keep me motivated and focused.
And while this is a physical representation of living in the NOW, since I’ve gotten off that mountain, I’ve realized that it applies in my spiritual/vibrational world too! I really wasn’t as relaxed or chill about the things I wanted as I pretended to be. But if I look down at my path, stay focused on my NOW, then I don’t get worried or overly anxious about the next step; it will unfold when the time is right and when I get to the top it has not actually been the big deal I was making it out to be when I was at the bottom of the hill.
So now I keep telling myself to remember my path, my NOW. Everything will work itself out in due time.
Hi Tiffany
I always love reading your comments…such wisdom and insight there. I love what you said about making that realization between what we say, what we may want to be, what we may intellectually understand and what we are actually BEING. It’s the second thing that really shows us where we stand inside, how much we have accepted these ideas,etc… Our life is our energy manifest…all we do is influenced by something internal. Many people overlook this crucial and very simple means of evaluating whether they have made any inner change. Any issue ‘getting in our way’ energetically can always be rectified…we created it so we can change it. The only real problem is if we aren’t being honest about it because then this change is impossible. You are doing fabulous and I love this analogy!
Tiffany, this is the best explanation of living in the now that I’ve read in ages. The weird thing is that this morning I was trying on hiking shoes in a camping shop…I’m not a hiker but was looking at something comfy to walk the dog.
And I love this blog post as well.
Hello Kelli,
thank you for the helpful post!
I like the idea of living in the ”now”. The truth is for example when i try to do it i see how my mind starts fighting against that, i start feeling tension inside and some kind of fear….i think its exactly what you’re explaining that usually happens….and i think as well that unfortunately the world we are living in and its conditions wont let us do that 100% ….somehow we will always have to think how this or that think will serve us in the future….cause the world is developing ( in a good or bad direction ) and we have to keep moving with it…,
I am trying as well to always think from what kind of energetic space i want to do this or that…and here i have big trouble cause its hard to define it….
Do you have any tips how we can make this easier ? Should we ask ourselves something specific so we can define it ?
Kind Regards,
Sandy
Hi Sandy
I see a common theme in your comments and questions…you seem to be identifying with your mind particularly strongly in ways that don’t serve you–this just isn’t you, it’s a lot of us–and still are kind of fighting for these perspectives and thinking it’s ‘right.’ You also seem to be aware this is a problem which is good…if you really make a conscious choice to stop doing this, a lot of the confusion you seem to feel will go away; you won’t always be looking for logical explanations and ‘actions’ to help you accomplish these things…they can’t be accomplished on this level. You need to start connecting with your inner world more and trusting what you find there.
Hey Kelli ,
Thank you for your answer. Yes other people have also told me that I’m “ a lot in my head” , but I really really don’t understand what they mean and how to stop it….the truth is it’s very hard for me to define which voice I’m hearing inside, which voice is pushing me to do certain actions or to want certain things…my ego or my soul.
I didn’t understood what you mean with “ it just isn’t you – it’s all of us “ ?
And you mean stop being so much in my head?
Thanks once again!