{"id":7818,"date":"2020-10-12T15:18:17","date_gmt":"2020-10-12T19:18:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/blog\/?p=7818"},"modified":"2021-07-30T06:11:37","modified_gmt":"2021-07-30T06:11:37","slug":"law-of-attraction-once-i-deal-with-my-ick-do-the-good-feelings-automatically-come","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/law-of-attraction-once-i-deal-with-my-ick-do-the-good-feelings-automatically-come\/","title":{"rendered":"Law of Attraction: Once I Deal with My \u2018Ick\u2019 Do the Good Feelings Automatically Come?"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n

Hello Kelli! I had a quick question: “After going through the ick and all the resistance, will we naturally feel better or I have to try to feel better?”<\/em><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Yes you will naturally feel better. Post Over.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Just kidding. I know the mind needs a bit more to go off of.\u00a0 There are a lot of nuances to personal growth work and energetic transformation that need a bit of teasing out to more fully understand how it all works. Things that seem very simple and straightforward become anything but once the good old mind gets involved in the process.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Why It is Automatic<\/h4>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

If you clean a dirty window what are you left with? Gleaming, shiny, clear glass. This is the natural state of the window. We didn\u2019t have to do anything to create the gleam, the shine, the sparkle, the clarity.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We just had to clean off the crap making it look all gross and dirty.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

The same thing with our emotional state. The main problem really isn\u2019t a lack of positive emotion and happiness per se…there is just lots of negative emotion dominating and making it hard to get in touch with feelings that are part of our natural state of being.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We don\u2019t come into the world sad, anxious, bitter, angry, fearful, frustrated, depressed or resentful. Look at little kids and how happy they are–they aren\u2019t trying to be that way. They aren\u2019t consciously trying to cultivate positive emotion. They just haven\u2019t been touched too deeply by the crappy programming and the like that starts piling on as we get older.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Our mind has grossly misinterpreted most of our life experiences, and the resulting stories, narrative, conclusions and decisions felt really badly and are at the root of all our negative feelings.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We have a lot of beliefs about ourselves and how the world works that make us feel disempowered and stuck, that make us believe things we want aren\u2019t possible, and to think we can never have all this stuff that our mind thinks we need to be happy…well, that feels pretty terrible right?\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We have zero tolerance for negative feelings and we do everything we can to try and avoid dealing with them. Most of our personal growth works becomes a hunt for all sorts of \u2018work arounds\u2019 so we can get happy and get our \u2018stuff\u2019 without ever having to deal with any of that crap.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

And all those feelings, all that energy, just stays stuck, it keeps dominating us. And then we wonder why all our efforts to \u2018raise our vibration,\u2019 to more consistently feel more positive feelings always falls flat. We can\u2019t seem to get a handle on this whole \u2018happiness\u2019 thing which just makes us feel 1,000 times worse.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

So, yeah, if you deal with all your \u2018ick\u2019 feeling better is a natural byproduct without a doubt.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Your negative feelings didn\u2019t come out of nowhere—all your mind chatter has some sort of emotional component and since most of the chatter is shit, you will feel like shit in turn! So once you start questioning the validity of that chatter, and see none of it is true, the feelings start automatically transforming because that is where they were coming from.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Once you let yourself really deal with your negative emotions, engage in brutal honesty about how you feel and why you feel that way, the energetic shift is huge. The emotional component of the beliefs and perspectives you consciously opt for instead feel wonderful–joy, peace, security, trust, faith, self-love. It\u2019s all automatic.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

The reason \u2018feeling better\u2019 seems so hard for most of us is because we do all we can to avoid dealing with what\u2019s making us feel badly. The harder you are \u2018trying\u2019 to feel better, the more crap there you are swimming upstream against.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Achieving a real, genuine sense of well-being in and of itself isn\u2019t the \u2018hard\u2019 part of the personal growth journey, it isn\u2019t something that requires \u2018effort\u2019. The willingness to deal with everything keeping us out of that space is what\u2019s challenging but if we accept it\u2019s challenging, it will feel less so.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

If we are finally willing to admit we have no choice but to deal with our \u2018stuff\u2019 realizing that is the only real barrier to energetically aligning with more desired circumstances, and actually feeling genuinely happier, you\u2019ll just do it.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

It will suck sometimes but you\u2019ll see it isn\u2019t that bad. You\u2019ll see the process can\u2019t actually hurt you, that you can\u2019t get \u2018stuck\u2019 in the feelings, that feeling them is the way through them.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

So yes, essentially it is an automatic process since the presence of the negative feelings is the actual problem, not any \u2018deficiency\u2019 in positive ones. But given the reality of human nature and the various tendencies of the mind, we need to understand\u2026\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

How It Isn\u2019t Automatic\u00a0<\/h4>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

There is a\u00a0 10 day meditation retreat I have done several times over the years. There is no talking. No internet. No phones. You are basically cut off from the outside world.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

While there were times where I certainly felt agitated ,and wanted to run screaming out of the meditation hall because I felt I couldn\u2019t sit there quietly for one more freaking second,\u00a0 for the most part, I experienced a sense of peace, a quietness of the mind that I never had in the \u2018real world.\u2019\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

And it\u2019s easy to see why. I wasn\u2019t absorbing anyone\u2019s negativity, no having to listen to anyone complain, no having to engage in discussions about low-energy topics that would trigger my fear and other \u2018ick.\u2019 I couldn\u2019t do any complaining of my own, indulge any of my mind\u2019s nonsense.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

No exposure to news or anything else that would sully my mind and energy.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Essentially I wasn\u2019t receiving any sort of external output that would disrupt my internal world in any way. I wasn\u2019t having any experiences that would challenge my positive thinking and sense of peace. There was nothing undermining that energy, nothing chipping away at it.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

But these aren\u2019t the conditions in which most of us find ourselves. We aren\u2019t shut away from the world, devoting our lives to spiritual growth and nothing more.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Most of us aren\u2019t enlightened beings who can continue to exist in the world without ever getting caught up in the nonsense.\u00a0 We will be \u2018in\u2019 the world\u2019 and \u2018of\u2019 it as well.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We are constantly getting sucked into the illusion. There are lots of powerful negative energies and beliefs on the collective level of humanity that you likely have bought into to some degree.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We have desires and with that will come attachments; there may always be that part of us that believes we must manifest certain things to be happy.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

There may be a part of us who will always believe certain elements of our past have done permanent damage to us psychologically and emotionally, leaving some black mark on our existence for as long as we live.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We have this ego\/mind part of us that is very powerful and has been running the show for quite some time.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

There are all manner of external \u2018saboteurs\u2019 that can undermine our efforts to be a truly emotionally healthy, happy person, both big and small.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Everything from the news to an encounter with a rude service person to rocky relationships with family members to television shows to the political party in power\u2026.the list could go on and on.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

So with all these \u2018threats\u2019 to our emotional well-being, and efforts to truly, deeply, genuinely embrace certain beliefs and ways of thinking, most of us are probably going to need to consciously and actively \u2018manage\u2019 our feelings.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We’ll need to do things that help nurture and protect the more beneficial energies we are looking to cultivate, that reduce our stress and keep us in a more positive frame of mind.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

And how we go about accomplishing this is a very unique, individual journey.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

What do you need to subtract from your life? Watch the news too much? Spend too much time watching reality shows full of ridiculous people you just love to hate? A toxic friendship? Drinking too much to cope with stress? Stretched yourself too thin with a variety of commitments, leaving too little time for yourself?\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

What do you need to add? Do you need to exercise more? Do you need to do things to manage a health condition better? Do you need to find more positive people with whom to surround yourself? Do you need to start meditating or engage in other tools that will help manage stress more effectively?\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

What are your major \u2018triggers?\u2019 right now for emotional \u2018ick?\u2019 A family member who pulls you into one emotional crisis after another, completely draining you? A relationship with a serious lack of boundaries that has you bending over backwards to meet their endless demands?\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Feeling resentful for not having enough time for yourself? Committing to something you don\u2019t actually want to do, don\u2019t have the energy for?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

If all the emotional transformation essentially comes from within by way of conscious choice about what we believe, conscious effort to embrace certain beliefs and really try and \u2018activate\u2019 the energy they bring us, by way of allowing our negative feelings so they don\u2019t build up, then the variety of tools and techniques available to us aren\u2019t technically necessary.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

But most of us are going to need some support, a way to deliberately activate certain energies so they gain real strength and momentum. So for most of us, things like meditation, affirmations and the like will be a very important and helpful part of our journey, of our \u2018vibe management.\u2019 Doing these sorts of things helps keep the \u2018bad\u2019 energies at bay, helps weaken them.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Most of us have things going on in our life that will challenge our well-being and we\u2019ll probably have to make certain changes, and make certain decisions, that would interfere with our effort, that create energies that undermine what we are trying to do.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

We have likely fallen into some bad habits that need changing; we may be spending our time in ways that aren\u2019t serving us and we need to do something about that.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

So, while essentially we don\u2019t need to \u2018do\u2019 anything to feel better, while it is something that naturally occurs when we deal with the \u2018crap\u2019 obscuring all the positive feelings that comprise our natural state, the reality of our human experience means certain changes and actions are often necessary to support these inner transformations, to keep that energy dominant.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Your Turn<\/h4>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

What did you think of the post? Anything resonate in particular? What helps you support your internal transformations?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

W<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Links of Interest<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Work With Me<\/a><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Courses<\/a><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Coaching Call Library<\/a><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Support My Work<\/a><\/p>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hello Kelli! I had a quick question: “After going through the ick and all the resistance, will we naturally feel better or I have to try to feel better?” Yes you will naturally feel better. Post Over. Just kidding. I know the mind needs a bit more to go off of.\u00a0 There are a lot […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9846,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[40],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7818","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-law-of-attraction"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7818","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7818"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7818\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9846"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7818"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7818"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7818"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}