{"id":635,"date":"2014-07-28T06:17:48","date_gmt":"2014-07-28T10:17:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/blog\/?p=635"},"modified":"2021-08-02T05:08:07","modified_gmt":"2021-08-02T05:08:07","slug":"calgon-take-away-coping-stresses-daily-life-part-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/calgon-take-away-coping-stresses-daily-life-part-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Calgon, Take Me Away: Coping with the Stresses of Daily Life Part 2"},"content":{"rendered":"

Hello again. Welcome to part two of my musings on how to reduce stress in everyday life.\u00a0 Decided to just jump right in today…enjoy! <\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t Resist, Accept<\/span><\/h2>\n

One area in which I am particularly interested when it comes to things of a \u2018self-improvement\u2019 nature is Buddhism. While it is considered a religion, its core tenets have nothing to do with belief in a certain God. Its primary focus is on purifying the mind, being a happier person, living in a way that promotes well-being, and finding effective ways to deal with the suffering that is part and parcel of the human experience.<\/span><\/p>\n

Everything starts in the mind, and I was definitely interested in learning about ways to make it stronger, less polluted, and more of a friend than foe. The Buddha was quite the smart cookie, and his teachings can benefit anyone, regardless of their religious belief, or lack thereof.<\/span><\/p>\n

He astutely observed the human tendency to crave the good stuff, and be averse to the bad stuff. Not too hard to figure out why we would operate in such a manner\u2014after all, we like feeling good and don\u2019t like feeling badly.<\/span><\/p>\n

This, however, causes us quite a bit of suffering does it not? Something happens, and it makes us feel stressed, angry or some other crappy emotion. And our aversion to these feelings only makes us feel worse. Not only are we upset about whatever situation triggered this feeling, we feel badly about feeling badly. Our dislike for these feelings just intensifies everything.<\/span><\/p>\n

But, there is a way around this. We can work on accepting moments for what they are. Sure, we may still be super-pissed, annoyed, stressed, frustrated, bewildered or what not; we may still have a very strong preference for a different scenario to be playing out in the moment. But, when we are more accepting, and not resisting the feelings these moments produces, we experience a major shift. That extra layer of emotion that comes from being upset we are upset is removed. <\/em><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

This one can take practice because we are so conditioned to respond in certain ways\u2014but, like I mentioned in my first post about learning to respond and not react<\/a>, we can change that. These reactions are not encoded into our DNA, they are simply the result of living on auto-pilot, and never making a conscious effort to change.<\/span><\/p>\n

Take Pleasure in the Little Things<\/span><\/h2>\n

It is never hard to conjure up negative feelings, or put our attention on the things we don\u2019t like or don\u2019t want to be happening. Sometimes we have to make a bit of an effort to shift our mindset and perspective to make us feel better. Being happy can seem really hard sometimes, right? What\u2019s up with that?<\/span><\/p>\n

One of the best ways I have found to reduce my stress, and just feel better overall is taking pleasure in lots of the little things in life that make me feel some sort of positive emotion. Traveling has really helped me with this.<\/span><\/p>\n

I absolutely love taking a nice hot shower\u2014I love how I feel so relaxed and clean after. When I am in it, I really focus on the water hitting my body, and it soothes me. This appreciation developed after traveling around Europe many years ago, and feeling gross and grimy after spending all night on a train.<\/span><\/p>\n

Between being a vegetarian, and being weird about food in various ways, traveling can be challenging sometimes. There are moments when I just really want certain types of foods, or wish the grocery store was more like America, where I can easily choose from amongst a dozen different types of hummus, or 25 brands of cereal. <\/span><\/p>\n

But, no matter where I am, I usually find at least a few things I like, or solid restaurants. And, this makes me feel truly happy, and I really try to focus in on the moment when I\u2019m eating and the pleasure I get from it.<\/span><\/p>\n

As I type this, I have two super-affectionate cats that seem to love sitting in my lap when I am working on my computer. It is a bit cumbersome to type, but their cuteness overwhelms me , and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Animals are great for melting stress, and all those other unpleasant feelings.<\/span><\/p>\n

Right now, think about all the little things in your daily life that evoke some sort of positive emotion in you. Make an effort to really zero in on those feelings when they occur; try to be in those moments fully as they are happening. Over time, this tuning in will come more naturally, and you will feel better and better throughout the day.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Meditate<\/span><\/h2>\n

On one hand, I believe there is no one best way to improve ourselves, be happier and all that jazz\u2014different things work for different people. But, on the other hand, I truly believe that meditation is the<\/em><\/strong> best way.<\/span><\/p>\n

Like I mentioned earlier, everything starts in the mind, and we have so much control over it. But, claiming this control is the challenge. It is kind of like a wild monkey, but it can be tamed. Sometimes–okay, most times–it doesn\u2019t feel like this though\u2014it seems like we’re being ruled by our thoughts and emotions, and are just hapless victims.<\/span><\/p>\n

Nothing could be further from the truth, however. It is just a matter of expanding our awareness, and tuning into what is happening. And, meditation is the most effective way to do this.<\/span><\/p>\n

I have been meditating for many years now, and I can say without a doubt it has been the most powerful tool for improving my life by leaps and bounds.<\/span><\/p>\n

When we meditate, we strengthen this space between our pure essence, and all the crazy thoughts and emotions that we experience on a daily basis. It makes you realize that you are not these things, they are separate from you. <\/em><\/strong>When we make this profound realization, it can dramatically alter how we live. It is almost like becoming a third-party observer to what is going on in your mind.<\/span><\/p>\n

Meditation allows you to tune into what is happening in your mind without attachment and judgment, and in the absence of these things, our negative emotions have much less power. We don\u2019t get as wrapped up in them. And, when we are not as wrapped up in them, they feel less intense, and pass more quickly.<\/span><\/p>\n

This practice will also help you tune into the fact our feelings are in a constant state of flux throughout the day. And when this idea of impermanence begins to trickle down from merely an intellectual understanding, to something you feel on an emotional level, you will react much differently to these feelings.<\/span><\/p>\n

Knowing the feelings will pass, you don\u2019t get as invested. You will handle them better\u2014you will be less likely to do and say things you know you shouldn\u2019t, or don\u2019t really want to, in an effort to make them go away as quickly as possible. You will be able to sit with them better. You will become more comfortable with being uncomfortable.<\/span><\/p>\n

I think many people are turned off from the idea of meditating because it is seen as a \u2018spiritual\u2019 practice, and that can make some people uncomfortable. They don\u2019t want to become one of those \u2018weird\u2019 people who talk about loving everyone, and all that other \u2018hippy dippy\u2019 stuff.<\/span><\/p>\n

And, while this practice is surely a foundation of many spiritual practices, at its core, it is highly practical in nature. It is an effective tool for reducing stress, and gaining better control of our mind, thoughts and feelings. I think that is something that most people crave.<\/span><\/p>\n

I have written a couple of posts about meditation that you can find here<\/a> and here<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

I think they are really helpful for anyone who is just starting out with meditation, or is toying with the idea of starting<\/span>, so I highly suggest reading them if you have even the slightest interest in learning more. <\/span><\/p>\n

So, give it a serious try\u2014it will change your life, I promise you that.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hope you enjoyed, and hope to see you back here Wednesday to read whatever it is I decide to write!<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hello again. Welcome to part two of my musings on how to reduce stress in everyday life.\u00a0 Decided to just jump right in today…enjoy! Don\u2019t Resist, Accept One area in which I am particularly interested when it comes to things of a \u2018self-improvement\u2019 nature is Buddhism. While it is considered a religion, its core tenets […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[22],"tags":[19,13,21,70],"class_list":["post-635","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-happiness","tag-acceptance","tag-challenges","tag-coping","tag-stress"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/635","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=635"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/635\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=635"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=635"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=635"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}