{"id":12498,"date":"2023-11-06T16:44:05","date_gmt":"2023-11-06T16:44:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/?p=12498"},"modified":"2023-11-06T16:44:05","modified_gmt":"2023-11-06T16:44:05","slug":"law-of-attraction-ive-stopped-taking-bad-feeling-action-so-why-havent-things-changed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/law-of-attraction-ive-stopped-taking-bad-feeling-action-so-why-havent-things-changed\/","title":{"rendered":"Law of Attraction: I\u2019ve Stopped Taking Bad Feeling Action So Why Haven\u2019t Things Changed?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Hi Kelli!\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

I read a lot about how it\u2019s important to do things that feel good to manifest what you want. I had been taking a lot of bad-feeling actions to reach my goals and have tried to do less of those things and take more \u2018inspired\u2019 action. But things are still the same. What are your thoughts on that?\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/h4>\n

Actions Are Level of Effect\u00a0<\/span><\/h4>\n

Everything we do is motivated by something happening within us, whether it is a \u2018positive\u2019 action or a \u2018negative\u2019 action. The \u2018doing\u2019 is preceded by something happening in our mind. We aren\u2019t just mindlessly taking random actions out of nowhere. In this sense all action is \u2018inspired\u2019 action.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0So while it certainly seems that action is the level of \u2018cause\u2019 it is actually on the level of \u2018effect.\u2019\u00a0 This can be hard to fully grasp because it very much appears to be the opposite. We do X and Y appears to happen. But whatever result we are getting is due to our state of mind.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Business is a good example of this. You can have people who work their asses off and take massive amounts of action, yet still struggle to see \u2018success\u2019 as the world defines it. Then there are people who appear to do very little and reap massive results. If action were the true level of \u2018cause\u2019 we would see the opposite.<\/span><\/p>\n

If action were the true level of cause, then anyone following the blueprint some business guru gives to grow their business, would get the same exact results as she did. But this is often not the case.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Some of the biggest shifts I have seen in my own business came after periods of taking actions that didn\u2019t feel good, getting sick of \u2018doing,\u2019 letting up all the negative feelings that were motivating the actions, and then not doing much of anything. That I was seeing the most results when I was doing the least, and feeling the best, was a very powerful experience for me. I really saw first hand it can\u2019t be about the action. How could it be when the most movement appeared to happen when I wasn\u2019t doing much of anything?<\/span><\/p>\n

All the \u2018work\u2019 we do in the realm of personal development is another good example, especially as it relates to \u2018manifestation.\u2019 If action were the true level of cause, then people doing the most affirmations, the most programs, the most of this tool or or that technique, would have the most \u2018stuff,\u2019 would see the most \u2018success.\u2019 And we all know that definitely isn\u2019t the case. In fact, the people who \u2018do\u2019 the most often seem to \u2018struggle\u2019 the most.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And if what is happening in the mind is the true level of \u2018cause\u2019 all\u00a0 this makes perfect sense. The more effort people expend on trying to \u2018manifest,\u2019 the more icky energy they\u00a0 have lying at the root of the desire, the more \u2018stuff\u2019 they are looking for the manifestation to fix, the more desperate they feel to acquire it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The Real Problem<\/span><\/h4>\n

If action isn\u2019t the true level of \u2018cause\u2019 then simply refraining from bad-feeling actions won\u2019t make a big difference. The action isn\u2019t really isn\u2019t our concern, it is the energy from which we are taking it. The bad-feeling action is merely a symptom of the real problem, which is what is happening in your mind, what is making you feel compelled to do things that don\u2019t feel good.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Of course, stepping back from bad-feeling action, with the understanding it is not serving you, is a tremendous step in the right direction. You are removing a lot of negativity from your life that would otherwise be generated from taking the action that strengthens and reinforces the attachment to whatever outcome you are seeking. A true, sincere willingness to do this shows a real faith and trust in the process, even if the amounts of this faith and trust are small in the beginning.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But in order to see real movement in your life, you need to look at the negativity deep inside that is motivating you to do things that don\u2019t feel very good. The only reason we would spend our time doing things that feel bad is if we were very emotionally attached to getting whatever it is we believe we will get as a result of these actions.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And that \u2018attachment\u2019 is never coming from a good place emotionally. The more strongly we want something in the outside world, the more pain we have inside that we believe the \u2018thing\u2019 will fix.\u00a0 The more attached we feel to getting something, the more painful the story we have around its absence.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Remember that terms like \u2018energy\u2019 and \u2018vibration\u2019 are just fancy words for feelings, and simply refraining from bad-feeling actions does nothing to address the feelings motivating them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

If spending hours a day swiping on dating apps was becoming so depressing and demoralizing, you decided to step away, you definitely made a good decision.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But if you don\u2019t address the root cause of why you were doing that, whether you are just so sick of being single, you are older and worry you\u2019ll miss out on having kids, or your ex has a new relationship so you best get one too, your experience in this area of your life will continue to be the same, at least for the most part.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

You have to explore why you are so attached to getting a relationship. You have to explore the fears you have around not having one now of not getting one in the future. Is it fear of being alone? Fear of being judged? Fear of people feeling sorry for you? Fear that all the bad things you think about yourself must obviously be true?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

You have to explore the story you have around your single status, the story you have around these fears and decide if this is the story you are sticking with. Does being single really mean there is something wrong with you? Does not having kids mean you will never have a truly fulfilling life? Do you think whether being married or not implies any inherent \u2018good\u2019 or \u2018bad\u2019 qualities in a person?<\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t be afraid of honestly exploring all of this. I know you really don\u2019t want to. I know you would much prefer to just figure out \u2018how\u2019 to get what you want and the manifestations will take care of the feelings. But they really won\u2019t. I promise you that. <\/span><\/p>\n

The egoic mind is very powerful and we can certainly create from that level without doing a deep dive into our mind. But those manifestations are not very satisfying. And for some people, there is just too much \u2018stuff\u2019 there to create from this more surface level. I know that may sound disheartening but if you believe you fall into this category, it is actually a good thing.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Creating a Less Tense Relationship with Action<\/span><\/h4>\n

How action fits into all this \u2018work\u2019 often proves to be a great source of tension for people for a number of reasons. First, we have a pretty deeply ingrained belief that action is the level of \u2018cause\u2019 so there is always the worry we aren\u2019t doing the \u2018right\u2019 things or enough things.<\/span><\/p>\n

Secondly, it is also pretty deeply ingrained that we only deserve money and other \u2018good\u2019 things if we work hard to earn them. We see our worth in what we do or contribute, not what we are. So while the idea of the Universe, God or Spirit taking care of us, and all we need to do is work on our mindset and emotional state, sounds nice, and we would like to believe it is true, in reality we are actually quite uncomfortable with it. We are not quite sure that is how it works. It seems like a risky proposition.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Everything we want in the external world is driven by some sort of negative feeling inside\u2013lack, not feeling good enough, wanting to \u2018prove\u2019 something to ourselves or others,etc.–and if we believe the only way we can feel better is to get certain things and change our circumstances in very specific ways, there will be a lot of fear around not getting them, and this fear will lead to a strong need to control. And the need to control will clearly manifest through action and \u2018doing.\u2019\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

So for most of us, the belief in the need to take action will remain pretty strong, and that\u2019s okay. The key is just understanding what is really happening, what is really responsible for your results or the lack thereof. Remember that changing the outside is not what will really make you happy, so going about doing that in a way that feels really bad hardly seems worth it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Do your best to take actions from a space of simply wanting to do something because it is enjoyable, not because you are simply trying to get something. The good feeling ideally should be its own reward. Don\u2019t hold everything you want so dear and precious. Don\u2019t take everything so seriously.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Just be aware of what is happening in your mind as you go about the pursuit of various goals, and keep reminding yourself about the true level of \u2018cause.\u2019 If you are doing something that feels really bad, then something is \u2018off\u2019 inside or the action wouldn\u2019t feel that way. You wouldn\u2019t be making yourself do something that you may have zero desire to do, but you believe you must to get a specific result, unless there was a strong attachment to a particular outcome. And remember that attachment is never coming from a good place.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

If a part of you believes that being on dating apps is an important avenue for meeting people, then be on them. But don\u2019t get too attached to this one way of connecting. It\u2019s not the end all be all. In theory, they seem like a great way to meet people, but the reality is often very different for people. Remember that for thousands of years, people were meeting and getting married without the internet.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

If you think taking certain actions for your business is important, then take them. Just don\u2019t confuse \u2018source\u2019 and \u2018channels.\u2019 Spirit is your true source of money and clients, not your Instagram account or your email list. So don\u2019t spend hours and hours of your time trying to build some arbitrary number of followers or subscribers if it doesn\u2019t really feel good.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

To truly develop a more harmonious relationship with action, which I think is a highly worthwhile endeavor, you need to be open to exploring your mind more deeply, being honest about what you find there, and be open to healing beliefs and thoughts responsible for this tense relationship. If in reality we are still going to be doing plenty of \u2018doing\u2019 in various respects, it makes good sense to do whatever we can to make that reality a more enjoyable, less stressful one.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/h4>\n

<\/h4>\n

The Answer Will Always Be Going Within<\/span><\/h4>\n

No matter where you are struggling in your life, no matter which areas the problems are showing up, the first and most important step will always be going within. The true, lasting answer will never be external to you. It will never be action; it will never be relying on anyone else to be a different way or to do something differently.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Manifestation is not an action-based process. While action is certainly a manifestation of energy and can influence the course of events, it will never be the crux of the process.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

If you ever think you must be doing something \u2018wrong\u2019, that you are not seeing certain results because you are not taking the \u2018right\u2019 actions, that will never be true. While refraining from energetically \u2018unfriendly\u2019 actions is certainly a good thing, that does not address the underlying energy that was motivating them. Taking the \u2018bad feeling\u2019 action wasn\u2019t a true problem in and of itself. It wasn\u2019t the \u2018cause\u2019 of the lack of results or any problems that may have resulted from doing these things.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The only reason we ask the type of questions this post is answering is because there is something inside of us that we are looking to make \u2018better\u2019 through manipulating the external world. We have a very strong attachment to getting certain things, and we want to make sure we are doing everything \u2018right.\u2019 <\/span><\/p>\n

We are desperate to get rid of all those uncomfortable feelings, and if we believe the only way to accomplish that is figuring out how to get all the stuff we think we want, the stakes become extremely high. And with those high stakes, come a lot of tension, anxiety, fear and an extremely strong need to control everything.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When we are willing to look at the real problem\u2013which is in our minds and not the current state of our life and what we have or don\u2019t have\u2013the stakes don\u2019t feel as high. We don\u2019t feel as much pressure to change the outside. <\/span><\/p>\n

We understand more deeply that it isn\u2019t the answer. And with that understanding, if we are honestly still left with some preferences for things to be a certain way\u2013getting a relationship, moving, finding a better paying job\u2013we will pursue these goals in a much more relaxed fashion.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

By doing that inner work, we will have made significant changes to our state of \u2018being.\u2019 And I have always said the \u2018being\u2019 paves the way for the \u2018doing.\u2019 You will just get a sense of when to take action and when to not, you will get a sense of what specific actions to take and which ones to avoid.<\/span><\/p>\n

You will no longer be operating from that mode of always feeling like it is up to you to figure everything out and constantly plotting each and every step, each and every move.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Your ego\/human\/personality self will have its preferences, it will believe it has certain needs, and you will tend to all that. But you won\u2019t take it all so seriously anymore because you see all these desires for what they really are, and have a better understanding of their limits in terms of enhancing your emotional well being. <\/span><\/p>\n

When you are no longer looking to all these things to \u2018fix\u2019 your deep emotional issues, you will enjoy the money, the travel, the relationship or whatever else a lot more.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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Hi Kelli!\u00a0 I read a lot about how it\u2019s important to do things that feel good to manifest what you want. I had been taking a lot of bad-feeling actions to reach my goals and have tried to do less of those things and take more \u2018inspired\u2019 action. But things are still the same. What […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":12505,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[40],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12498","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-law-of-attraction"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12498","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12498"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12498\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12506,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12498\/revisions\/12506"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12505"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12498"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12498"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.livelifemadetoorder.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12498"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}