Ryan and I were having a conversation with a fellow traveling couple today, and it had me reflecting on my journey to living the life I want to live, and some issues that popped up for me over the last few months that challenged me.

When we get into personal development ,and the law of attraction in particular, on some level, I think we have an expectation that we can somehow create this perfect life and become this perfect person.

We’ll find a way to transcend any unwanted emotion and somehow prevent anything ‘unwanted’ from ever happening again. We achieve these states of feeling all is right with the world and they can become addicting. We think maybe we have finally ‘made it,’ only to have something unwanted happen or to wake up feeling depressed for no reason.

And not only are we feeling badly, we feel badly about feeling badly–we develop an aversion to these moments and then feel like we have to try even harder to ‘get happy’ and get rid of them.

It’s not the unwanted that is causing us so much suffering, it is how we are viewing it, it is all the self-judgment we heap on ourselves for not handling it ‘better’ or for still dealing with things we think we should have moved past by now, given all our ‘work’ and all the wisdom we have amassed.

We get this idea that these things aren’t ‘supposed’ to be happening or that negative emotion is ‘bad.’

But as I always like to remind everyone, we are human. We will be constantly navigating between this aspect of ourselves and ‘big’ us who knows we are enveloped in love and support from the Universe, knows who we really are and knows what we are capable of. That is all part of the game.

We really want to try to  remember  anything happening to us is just showing us something. It is giving us an opportunity to step more into who we really are, and chip away a bit more at the illusion and the erroneous conclusions our mind has made about who we are and ‘how it is.’

The bigger the shitstorm, the bigger the opportunity. The more resistance you are dealing with, the more you are being invited to release.

Imagine if just for a moment, everything that is happening right now is exactly what is supposed to be happening? Imagine that nothing has gone wrong.

Be willing to consider the possibility that the change you are desiring, or the thing you want to attract is not the solution to your current problem, or the key to feeling better about what is happening right now.

How much easier would it be to detach from this manifestation? How much less pain would you feel because of its absence?

If what is happening right now is exactly what is supposed to be happening, how much easier would it be to deal with? How much easier would it be to figure out what it is showing you and what opportunity is being presented to you?

Instead of trying to make yourself feel better, how about just letting yourself feel whatever you are feeling, knowing that is a linchpin in healing whatever is happening?

Once we start dealing with our feelings, we don’t have to be ‘shown’ them as much anymore in the form of manifestations we tend not to like very much, but need to experience because those buttons still need to be pushed.

Do what you can to feel better, but know that there is nothing wrong with how you are feeling now. Don’t try to force anything. Don’t judge yourself or berate yourself for not being ‘better at life.’

Don’t think for one second that things can’t get better and that you must resign yourself to whatever is happening now…that is so not true.

You can have whatever it is you want, but be willing to concede that whatever your mind is declaring is just a fraction of what is possible and may not be the best representation.

Be willing to consider maybe it’s not supposed to be here yet–not because something beyond you is holding it back for some reason, but because there is still stuff that needs to be done before you can enjoy this thing in all its glory, because something even better may be in the works.

Hope you enjoyed that. What did you think of the post? Are you going through a rough patch? Anything resonate with you in particular? Any advice you would give?

Also, don’t forget to sign up for class number 3 in the Manifesting Like a Mofo Series:

Get Everything by Wanting Nothing: How to Stop Creating from Ego 

Taking place November 1st 3 PM Eastern Time. Everyone gets access to the recording so don’t worry if you can’t make it live.

Also, check out my interview on This Weird Thing Called Life podcast: Your Life Your Way. Lots of inspiration and lots of practical tips.